I tried to walk in your shoes on Saturday.
The honor of acting as the father of Christie at her wedding was bestowed upon me.
Christie may have chosen me for this privilege because I remind her so much of you. She has told me as much on many occasions over the past four years that I have known her. Just about every time I flip a song, she says with her inimitable smile, ‘my dad and I used to listen to that.’ From Bob Marley to Van Morrison, it seems you and I ride to a similar rhythm.
Several times Christie has come to me for life counsel that one would normally reach out to a father for. And when it is done she often reminisces with a glimmer in her eye that that is exactly how you would have handled it. Ironically, when such nostalgic moments turn into tears it seems I even console her in a similar way that you used to.
I want to thank you for giving me fulfilling learning and growing opportunities. My only potential child was aborted in compliance with the firm policy of the priesthood of your church that I served most of my adult life in. But because of your chosen absence I have been graced with the chance to come in touch with a bit of perhaps humankind’s greatest developmental growth experience: parenting. I have not had to shed the blood, sweat and tears you have in bringing children through birth, childhood, adolescence and into adulthood. Instead, I have been given the opportunity to temporarily substitute for you for one graduate of yours of that evolution.
I gave Christie away on Saturday with no doubts or reservations whatsoever. As noted, apparently I have walked through life with a similar perspective to yours. Based on the accumulation of whatever wisdom I’ve been able to retain during that journey, I can assure you there is no finer man to be found than her husband Michael John Rinder. He is a man of conscience molded in a crucible of adversity that few are adventurous enough to ever experience. Few have lived a life of such selfless devotion and weathered as many vicissitudes as Mike. And of those few, I am unaware of any who came out the back end with so much love, hope and tolerance as Mike. You could not find a better father for your grandchildren.
Your grandchildren are the living proof of what I am trying to convey to you. At fourteen months of age, Jack is a veritable lighthouse. I think anyone who has been in his presence will agree. He lights up every space he enters. Shane, all of six years old, is as intelligent, mature, and at the same time insouciant, as any child I have known.
And at the center of this family, the sun that nourishes it with life-giving light, of course, is the Queen of the Slipstream – your daughter Christie King Rinder.
Thank you for letting me know and be part of this incredible family.
I want you to know that I still abide by our shared team sports ethos. I recognize and accept that I am merely a lowly substitute. I am doing my best to simply not let the comfortable lead you – the star – created slip away while you starters catch your breath.
There is an old proverb that says, your home is where your heart is. When you find it in your heart to come home I will gladly step aside and be the first (of thousands) to celebrate you.
As always. Very Classy Marty.
Everyone at this wonderful wedding looked radiant.
BUT — Christie took the prize as most elegant and gorgeous bride.
In one of the more beautiful dresses I’ve ever seen!!
Very well said Marty!!We all came back to shine and we are doing it!! thanks Marty and Mike you are a great example love you..
Thank you Marty. You have me in tears.
ThankYOU my friend.
You have served the role of Christie’s father with such grace and dignity and love over these past 4 years, I can find no adequate words to thank you. I won’t gush on, it would be unbecoming and I know you find it somewhat uncomfortable. But let me sum it up in a few words — you and Mosey are the best friends we could possibly have and we are extremely fortunate to know you.
I hope that sometime down the road (and may it not be too long) we can both sit down with Eddie and Liz and share our “Christie stories” as she has shared so many with us about them.
I’ve been in the same shoes as you for various different but similar reasons. I love what you wrote because those were the thoughts that I had. Thank goodness that the real father of the bride was able to eventually slip back into his role as I stepped back into the shadows and he was able to enjoy his daughter and son in law for the remaining years of his life. Thanks for sharing this story. It brought tears and memories for a similar soul.
Thank you Christie.
It’s enough to make even the most cynical old critics cry.
Ah! Pure human love and decency! This is the most powerful post I have ever read here Marty.
Above the fray of all this crazy lack of understanding, that is ubiquitous in this psychological and spiritual incubation chamber called leaving behind only way mindsets, there, is the picture of beauty, smiles of love and natural freedom not afforded to those still in the darkness of false beliefs.
Out of all the posts ever posted on any of these sites anywhere, this one post is the shining example of moving up a little higher.
Secret onlookers who want to break away from the mental and emotional prison, please look at these indicators. Does this look like people becoming a solid rock?
Do these look like evil SPs?
Do these look like world destroyers?
Can you be so unfortunate in perception that you could remake this scene of beauty into something ugly?
Somewhere deep inside you know. You know that what you see here is goodness, love and truth.
How long will you deny youself these very same things?
Be bold, know what you know, think for yourself, be who you really are and not what your fears dictate.
The spiritual life is supposed to be about happiness. Just look at these peope! Just look!
Beautiful words Marty. It looks like you all had a wonderful time. I’m hoping too that Eddie makes his way back home.
Beautiful. Pure theta. Thank You.
Beautiful – congratulations to you all.
I second the sentiment! I came very close to losing my daddy a few years ago to illness and can not imagine what life would be like without him. You have handled your situation with your dad with such grace, I am awed by you! I remember your first visit to see Marty and was taken by how strong you were then….and now…even stronger! You are my sister and we adore you and Mike, Shane and my Mr. Jack! ❤ ❤
1. you are an amazing writer.
I want you to teach me how to write.
2. You are setting an outstanding example of a homo novus.
Only by that means can people set a respectable example, where even some enemies should respect.
There are two ways to establish a reputation.
One is to be praised by noble men,
and the other is to be accused by rogues.
It is however best to secure the first,
because it is always accompanied by the latter.
Charles Caleb Colton. Paraphrased
For more words of wisdom visit:
Thank you Mosey. You are the best sister a girl could have.
That letter was beautiful, and filled with nothing but love and respect.
PS Keep up all your great work .
That was beautiful!
It brought tears to my eye.
Well said, Marty.
Wait a second. This is beginning to sound like Chinatown: sister? mother? sister? mother?
Pingback: An Open Letter to Eddie King | Mike Rinder's Blog
I feel the love and joy ,That’s why I respect you Marty!
Lovely. Best of happiness and ARC to all.
A beautiful message which i sure hope will be received by the addressee.Wishing a long and exquisite life to the Rinder family.
Wait a minute, are we talking about the Eddie King who played fullback at Tailback U. (USC) and tried out for the Green Bay Packers back in the day and worked at the Pasadena Mission in the mid-70s? That Eddie King?
First, great letter, Marty. Very well said. I hope the it reaches the target.
Christy… beautiful! You’re dress is outstanding! Cute pic with the whole family, Jack on your hip. Sweet!
Mike, you lucky guy! Take good care of her. 😉
Y’all take care of each other!
Marty, you are the most beautiful soul I have ever met. Thank you for caring!
Not only did he try out, he played for the Green Bay Packers.
Reblogged this on 31 Factors.
Beautiful, just beautiful.
Marty, your letter to Eddie is very touching. It brought tears to my eyes. I am happy for Christy and Mike to have you in their lives.
To Eddie I would say that the responsibility of a parent to a child never ends. Nobody can tell you to drop that responsibility. I know of fathers and mothers that while on their death bed made sure their adult child is well taken care of. You, abandoned your child just because some SP told you so. That is beyond criminal.
Wow, Marty! That one tapped thousands on the shoulder.
Christie, I sincerely pray that you and your dad are reunited soon. What joy is his for the taking. 🙂
Calling people ‘criminals’ isn’t likely to impinge in the way you might be intending. Nor does calling the founder of their religion an ‘SP.’
I love weddings ! you all look so happy.
I hope your letter reaches them.
Marty, this is both heartwrenching and uplifting, at the same time. Christie is fortunate to have you in her life, but I have to believe that at some point her father will come to his senses and realize what a treasure he is letting slip through his fingers.
Beautiful. I have tears. Congratulations to you all ❤ xxx
Marty, what a beautiful letter to Eddie King. I hope they see the light and reunite with their beautiful daughter, son in law and grandkids. What a beautiful and theta wedding! Loved the pictures. I cried when I read your letter.
Marty. thank you for a piece of writing filled with love and wisdom, and for performing such a valuable role for someone who very much deserves it. I can only hope that Eddie and Liz read your open letter and respond in the way of loving parents.
I feel like getting on a plane, flying to Texas to hug you. I knew Christie before she joined the Sea Org-as a teenager. Because of your Blog, I was able to get back in comm with her. Thank you for being there for her. The picture of you walking her down the aisle brought tears to my eyes – Marty gets to be a Dad. It has brought me peace to know she has Mike and you in her corner. I didn’t know her parents. How sad for them to miss this occasion and time with their wonderful Daughter and Grandchildren. And I’m sure they would love Mike too. Enforced Disconnection is evil. Lets all postulate that her parents can rise above this and realize the truth. They are slaves and freedom awaits. I hope the phone rings soon, Christie. Love you.
I have never been a guest to a more beautiful wedding. When Christie started down the winding path to the ceremony platform, besides noting how absolutely gorgeous she looked my first thought was how very appropriate it was that she was walking that path with Marty. In her father’s unfortunate absence, Marty filled the shoes perfectly.
Wonderful words Marty, you are a poet warrior of the old school.
Marty, thank you for being there for Mike and Christie. Having some idea of the obstacles that had to be overcome to make this glorious event happen, I am so happy that you could give Christie away for this momentous occasion! A wonderful win for all of us! May all of you continue to Flourish and Prosper as we keep moving up a little higher!
Catherine Von Ach
Beautiful. Beautiful. Beautiful.
What a beautiful post and what great comments have followed. Yours are always one of the first things I read while pawing through my emails, and this one really made my day. And “Celebrate Me Home” is one of my all-time favorite songs and so appropriate. What a wonderful event for friends to attend and be inspired by. I could ramble on for a long time! Purrrrr-rr-r-r……
Oh I do sincerely hope Mr. King sees this!
I shed a few tears myself…
Ya know Marty… Chirstie is not the only one to benefit from your effortless paternal skills.
In the few conversations we have had over the years you have helped me, shown me more love and been more of a Father than my own by many miles.
You are a natural Marty. Always authentic, always compassionate and always interested. I know no better ingredients for a parent.
You set a high bar to emulate.
Me and my own son are very grateful.
And a humongous congratulations to Christine and Mike! Wonderful news indeed…😊😊😊
Marty, this is beautiful and touching.
Your theta and aura shine through in what you write.
Marty, please, can you do something about the previous post?
That one wasn’t so theta.
Christie and Mike, I do regret Tami and I mised it.
We’ll make up the damage when we soon meet.
It is such joy to witness the love and harmony of your family.
What a beautiful take on life. The bride shines so beautifully and the whole family is just a pleasure to observe. This powerful message is very capable of defrosting true believers. I certainly wish that.
My God Marty, that was so beautifully stated. You are like no other and I am so happy to know you!!! XOXO
Thanks Dani. On the last post, the ball is your court. That you are so bent out of shape about my having quoted your group’s attacks upon me and my wife indicates to me Scientology is still holding your conscience in pawn.
Beautifully said, Marty. I wholeheartedly hope it reaches Eddie King and that he reads it.
Congratulations to Christie and Mike. All good wishes to you and your family!
Very high toned statements and my strongest postulates that this message arrives by Mr. King.
And what a wonderful Family!
Christie a wonderful bride, Mike, as always, the gentlemen he is. And the kids. 🙂
Blessings from Europe.
Yes Christie, i second that emotion.
If your father is the same person who used to be
the cramming officer at old ASHO in 1975, I must
say he was the best. And Liz used to be a superb
auditor. Good for you that you now have Marty
there plus a very good husband. And what beautiful
Equal parts bittersweet. Christie is very blessed to have you in her corner. I am sorry to hear of your situation regarding forced abortion. It’s one of the more heinous things about Corp Scientology. I am happy you get to experience the joys of being asked to step in for an absent father. Everyone looks so happy. Congrats to Mike, Christie and family!! Many happy years to come. The pictures of the children are beyond words in how precious they are.
Mr. King, if you somehow get to read this, please think hard about what you are missing not being a part of this beautiful family. You have a lot of support waiting for you if you choose to join in.
Marty, I am very glad that you chose to write this – it is exactly what is needed, and I am sure that he will get the message by some channel. I bet there is someone out there who is “Under the radar” who can pass a message to Eddie King who will print this piece and pass it along to him. (You know who you are – please do this…) I cannot think of a more Theta message for him to receive.
Fantastic photo’s. Beautiful words. I wish the family and friends a wonderful future.
I’d like to second all of the “beautiful” comments on here.
Then I guess I’m just dumb.
I still do not know of any “your group’s attacks”. I never attacked, never was an accomplice to any attack. Never even knew of an attack.
MS2 is not about you and I don’t know of any action of MS2 to hurt you or Mosey. We just want to get together to do Scientology.
It’s OK for you, and many other friends, to not join. You may enrich your life and continue your spiritual pursuit as you understand it.
Tami and I love Mosey and you and will always respect your choices. But I may differ with you on how we, “the Indie movement” should procceed.
And it may move on in many routes and these should dovetail and need not clash.
yUp, tears here. Wonderful sentiments Marty. Nothing is so touching as an OT can share when he decides to.
Yeah, he told me he was one of the last cuts. Man, that must be where Christie gets her moxie.
Not calling the founder SP. I don’t think he was. However, dm is.
Watch your manners around her – she can throw down one hell of a clotheline tackle on the offensive inclined.
Has Tommy Davis inhabited your fingers? I’m ending this discussion on this forum. Amazing how the MS2 crowd can try to turn a wedding into a funeral.
Well, to those who read my book and gave it much credence you are.
That was beautiful Marty. Just beautiful.
And fitting for the beautiful Rinder family. I did shed a happy tear or two.
I got it. I have read the book and gave it much credence. I must admit, when I wrote the comment, I did not think about it that way, but I can see it now. I should have written explicitly dm.
As for LRH. I have read your book. I duplicated it, and I believe it’s a credible record. I have a theory of what happened with him. Once I crystallize it in my mind, I will put it in writing.
Ok, thanks man.
Dani please, Marty was very specific in his post about the insults hurled at him and Mosey by some of the eleven. I tried not to take sides, but having read it again, I must tell you, I would be very suspicious about people who treated my auditor that way.
When I witnessed who was giving Christie away as they walked down the aisle, my first thought was, PERFECT. Having 3 beautiful grandchildren I can attest to Mr. King that he needs to get exterior to his enforced decisions and take a look at Christie’s Face Book page where he will find awesome photo’s of very important members of his family. Next he should pick up the phone and make amends.
Marty…your message to Mr. King brought an oversized old crusty Irishman to his knees with sobbing tears…Your best post ever.
That was a great open letter written by someone who truly loves Christie as so many who know her have come to see is an irresistible thing to feel. I believe the truth of what you wrote Marty found it’s way to him and he’ll be compelled to see what’s so clear – family, people, friends, relationships, love are the reason any of the tech matters at all. Without those things being cared for what good is any of it.
We love you guys Mike and Christie and wish you long and happy lives together.
I was with Christie the day of her birth, best friend with the divine Liz King and Eddie King – what a beautiful tribute from Marty – I pray for Divine Intervention that Eddie and Liz will reconnect with this beautiful family –
Beautifully written Marty. I saw how loved you were at this wedding by the guests. So much for the silly rumors re you and the Indies.
It was a fairy tale wedding. Memorable.
Very moving. Wonderful.
George M. White
Beauty and poignancy all in one brief breath.
My best wishes to all! Mike and Christie, thanks for sharing this.
I wish I could put all my love and admiration and mooshy-gooshy feelings into words. I am so happy for all the happiness! 🙂
This was a wonderful fulfillment of something long awaited! Beautiful bride, beautiful kids, great groom, storybook stuff! Congrats all.
Your message Marty is full of LOVE.
PERHAPS one day that will be what will count again in our lives.
We really wish Eddie ( and Liz) to be back home soon.
As you noted … our home is where your heart is….
No heart where they are now.
As you have already said before Marty, “We take care of our own”. More evidence as to what a civilized and caring group of people the lot of us are and always have been.
If everyone would realize that once you step away from the Church it is not incumbent upon any of us to have enemies anymore, the lot of us would have a great group of friends spilled all across the planet.
It is really a burden gone to park your enemies at the Church and leave them there when you walk out. One has no more obligations to hate attack harm or suppress others once they depart from that culture.
Really great to see a group of friends together wishing well for one another.
One thing that we all took with us from the Scientology, a lot of good friends.
I’ll summarize MS2:
We are going to take a failed business model but we’re going to make it better.
In short, good luck because you’re going to need it.
God bless you Marty Rathbun, you are a wonderful human being.
Erudite, heartfelt, poignant.
Brothers in arms. And sisters.
Thank you for sharing your momentous ceremony with us all.
Beautifully and eloquently written as you always do. Congrats to everyone!
Mike, Christie, Marty, and Monique, thanx for sharing! I’m misty eyed and feeling like an “old softie” in my middle age.
Classy as always.
Sometimes I wonder if I wasted 30 years of my life promoting Scientology, particularly in the latter years. There were adventures good and bad. But if I gained anything from it, it is connecting with people like Mike, Christie and yourself.
I also want to acknowledge you for all the work you have put into your posts, despite everything. Just know that there are many people out here who have read them and many that you have helped move on up a little higher. That a few elect you to be their leader, executioner or op-term doesn’t come close to the thousands who have been helped by you.
Without the work that you did at the outset with your forum, none of what came later would exist.
Enjoyed your last book as well..
Keep on keeping on.
Very powerful, very touching and very healing. Not only what you said, but perhaps more importantly what you did. This is the type of thing that ripples across the Dynamics.
Thanks for sharing.
Tears of joy!
That was excellent, Pal! I’ve got tears in one eye and a twinkle in the other! Doug
Marty, you are eloquence itself.. And you look terrific! I’m so happy about this wedding.
Mark — took the words right out of my mouth….
I saw that movie Marty. I know the scene. Where Jack Nicholson asks Faey Dunawaye who the girl was she went to see and she said “She’s my sister and my daughter!”. 🙂 I didn’t like that movie too much. Christie looks really stunning in that white gown, and Mike RInder is a handsome daddy. What more can I say. 🙂
++++1 maybe even a thousand,,,
I second that.
MS2: Mgmt of Corp Scn, second string (light & Ltd.). Can’t seem to get anything DONE.
Beautiful sentiments Marty.
It gave me hope that my wife Karry’s dad and the rest of her family will someday reunite with us. Karry also had that special relationship with her dad. He was also a very loving and devoted grandfather, taking time out of his busy schedule to come to our home weekly to teach his two granddaughters classical music appreciation. It was something that our whole family looked forward to and had great fun with every week.
Hopefully someday these families will come to their senses and realize that they will not (and indeed cannot) forfeit their eternity for daring to disobey the Church of Scientology’s despicable dictates.
I admire Christie and my wife Karry greatly for their strenghth of character in enduring this trial. I admire you for being there for Christie when she needs a “dad”.
I knew Eddie only briefly when by luck we were in the same place for a few months in the 70’s,. But he was one of my favorite people at that time — a really good guy. It ‘s a crime that he and Christie, and of course so many others, were separated. I hope he somehow comes to realize that he can have both real Scientology AND his daughter by joining her out here.
Very classy. Beautiful! Thanks so much for doing this and for telling the story. I really appreciate it.
Beautiful Words, true words. honest words.
I wish they cut through the fog
so the sun can warm all hearts.
Eloquent and moving. Your story is clearly far from over.
Yeah, it looks like ms2 is an exercise in futility.
Marty – that was very nicely said – with lots of love.
It is heart warming that you guys all take good care of each other and the love between you is great!
Congrats Mike and Christy – may you be blessed always with these good friends!
You have been through so much together that the bonds are very strong. You all deserve to have good, long lives surrounded by lots of loving and caring family and friends!!
Very moving and uplifting blog post. Thanks for sharing. 🙂
We’ve never met though I heard a lot about you over the years. I left much earlier than you, early 80s. I read your letter to Eddie and was astounded at the level of deep emotion, forgiveness and just plain love you exhibited. It’s an honour itself just to have been permitted to read it. As my forebears would put it, “You’re a Mensch!”
Hi Lars – Yes, the people you describe are my parents. He was an amazing cramming officer and wore that hat in many other ways too. Thanks for the kind wishes.
Oh my goodness! I used to know Liz, she was Burgess back in the early 70’s at Hawaii Org. She was a good auditor. This must be so hard for her. She was attractive and Christie resembles her.
Dan, I didn’t know that you knew my Dad. He played for Green Bay and also played for the Saints for a bit too. A very competitive guy, didn’t ever let us kids win. We had to fight for it.
Love you Grandpa Jack.
So true Gayle.
The pictures really are worth a thousand words
Love Peace and Happiness
Marty, you wrote a heart warming letter, and the pictures were beautiful.
I don’t know Christie or Mike personally, but I wish them continued happiness and strength.
That made me cry.
So happy for you people!!!
Damn. I gotta confess, Mosey accuses me of that too. I really look forward to meeting this cat.
I gotta say that I think an open letter to Christie’s Dad is a less than brilliant move if the purpose is an attempt to reunite Christie with her Dad. Seems more of an attempt to publicly embarrass the Dad than bring about a reconciliation. IMHO this is something that would have been better handled by creating a back channel.
If you knew the efforts Christie, Mike and I have made over the past four years you wouldn’t likely come to such an uninformed judgment.
Kevin: I don’t agree. Nothing, IMHO, in Marty’s open letter could be misunderstood as an attempt at public embarrassment.
In fact, what Marty did was to show how similar he might be to Eddie King – so much so that Christie often compares him to her Dad.
Actually Kevin, I find that what Marty has been doing and continues to do on his blog – with his book recommendations, with his utter unwillingness to launch into snapping terminals … etc., is to be an example to each of us that we are MUCH MORE similar than we are different.
We all bleed red blood.
We all weep salty tears.
We all are fooled by our egos and thus defend ourselves to the detriment of our lives — that pass us by as we stand on a corner pointing fingers.
It’s a new day … we would all do well to start with being thankful we are alive … and decide to watch our minds … see the fixations … listen to the harping and indignation and then …
Decide to change. Bit by bit.
How exactly do you create a back channel with a scientologist ‘in good standing’ who has bought into the party line that ‘those willing to say what is true for them’ are suppressive people?
Of course I am uninformed as to the actions taken in the past at reconciliation but I don’t see that your open letter helps in that effort one bit.
In any event, my comment was directly due to my recently reading about the heroic, almost superhuman, efforts of Elihu Washburne, the US Ambassador to France, during the Siege of Paris in 1870 and the subsequent Paris Commune. After reading about this man of upmost integrity and perseverance, one realizes real diplomacy is totally lacking in our current world.
I don’t recall LRH ever writing about diplomacy which is probably why the major players on both sides of the War of Scientology are dug into their trenches, with no peace in site. As in all wars, it is the rank and file, on both sides, who really suffer.
As the saying goes, “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”
Kevin, You worry too much! Be happy:)
Do you have a son named Brandon?
Ok, Kevin. I accept that I was wrong in your judgment.
THIS is how it’s suppose to be….Love….Hope and forgiveness. 🙂
I do not know but that, among other actions, is what good diplomats do.
I say this with all sincerity, I do suck at diplomacy.
Yes and I think it’s fair to say that back channels assisted our reunification which, now that I think of it, probably also prompted by comment.
Absolutely beautiful, Marty. Christie was breathtaking. The ceremony an affirmation of life, hope, love and joy. The 3rd time through your post, my eyes are still leaking some substance.
It was great seeing you Dave. Nobody holds a candle to you as a bartender.
A diplomat is born!
Wait a minute… You said you suck at diplomacy!
What a wedding gift. That could be some of your best writing, Marty. Absolutely beautiful piece.
Beautiful, moving words. You got us all teary-eyed here. Just beautiful.
Do I detect a hint of pride in that statement?
From Wikipedia: “Diplomacy is the art and practice of conducting negotiations between representatives of groups or states.”
A lot of innocent people on both sides of this war have been harmed. Those who were never involved in Scientology (such as relatives) are caught in the cross fire. I’m not pointing a finger and singling out any of the major players. I’m pointing my finger at all the major players.
The only solution is a diplomatic one. Everything else is just posturing.
Christ, what do I gotta do to get you to stop busting my balls?
Not possible Marty. Kevin likes to be a contrarian and try to stir people up. He is pretty arrogant about his assertions.He lives down the street from us, backed out of meeting a few times, but likes to publicly criticize our efforts to resolve this situation without knowing anything about what has been done. He is entitled to his opinion, but I find his comments to be somewhat hypocritical. I am happy he reconnected with Brendan, he is a wonderful guy who was at our wedding. His daughter however, remains in the Sea Org 2 miles away from him and he has not managed to reconnect with her.
Thanks Mike. GO – like OSA – indoctrination can be a hell of a monkey to wrestle off one’s back.
As the granddaughter of a career diplomat — and one of the builders of the League of Nations — you, Kevin, have a woefully dreamy-eyed view of diplomacy.
In case you missed it — most diplomats are trained. And thus they build a network of “good ole boys” — and where they went to school matters.
Diplomacy is many things, not the least an ability to throw a “to die” for party where liquor flows along with secrets.
My father was able to enter the United States BECAUSE of the friendship my grandfather had with someone VERY highly placed in an alphabet soup agency. My father’s sin was to have been young and reckless sitting out the war in Switzerland with other axis young men — and a beacon for trouble.
In any case, it wasn’t my grandfather’s ability at diplomacy that got a visa for my dad — it was his wide net of friends across the pond.
THAT is primarily what diplomacy is. Any books to the contrary are just window dressing.
I believe it is friends and family ultimately that will save the day — it’s up to us to widen our net of friends.
THIS is something everyone of us could do and I believe should do. Eventually one friend will know someone well who can then talk to them on and on …
Eventually everyone COULD be a friend.
This is what Marty is saying — as far as I can hear. His own willingness to BE a friend. Regardless.
I have to say, besides the beautiful sentiment, that this was probably the best writing I have ever read of yours Marty. It was poetic and loaded with high truth. It was if you were exterior to the Human race and were communicating from another plane. Very excellent communication.
Mike: It is with great disappointment to see you write publicly about our private communications, the same private communications in which you were very understanding about why I decided not to attend parties you invited me to. You have my sincere hope that Marty’s letter helps reunite Christie with her Dad.
Kevin — you were the one who decided to publicly criticize Marty (and by association, me and Christie). I disclosed nothing about any conversations. What I don’t understand is your desire to criticize what others are attempting to do to get their families back together. Your efforts to do anything about the overall situation seems limited to commenting from the sidelines with an air of superiority. I find that even more disappointing. You are a smart guy and you could potentially do something to change the scene that I know you do not agree with. Something that is, other than proferring your opinion about how the efforts of others are inadequate or incompetent.
Marty, your tribute is heart warming, life affirming and beautiful.
Congrats to Christie and Mike!
Kevin, by saying: “diplomacy” you said absolutely nothing. Do you have any clear step by step procedure to suggest? If so, please do. Otherwise, you are just playing a devil’s advocate, and your comments are meaningless.
Congrats to Christie & Mike, what a beautiful family!
Lovely, Touching, Heartfelt letter, Marty. Oozing with emotion & theta.
The dichotomy is the sadness it illicited… that in the name of religion- disconnection of families occurs. And, that that same religion espouses one of the more well known tenants of “Communication is the Universal Solvent”.
I just can’t wrap my head around how trained Scientologists simply can’t see, what seems so obvious….
Christie, how wonderful that you have Marty! And, Mosey!
My best wishes to you & Mike.
Lots of love, Midge
Beautifully put Marty. Bravo Sir.
I did not publicly criticize Marty. I publicly questioned the prudence of the open letter.
You did disclose information from our private emails. Specifically that I had agreed to meet you and then decided not to. That’s certainly not information that came from a public discussion nor is it at a big deal. I really could care less. The really disappoint is that you related the information in a pejorative manner whereas in our private conversations you were quite empathetic as to why I declined the invites. That, Mike, was quite disappointing and IMHO beneath you.
While I do prefer to work from the “sidelines” this does not mean I am not getting products. You of all people should know that as several have met with you and/or Marty. And let’s not forget your good friends have a safe place to lay their heads, due in no small degree to my pocketbook.
But back to the open letter. If you and/or Marty want to publicly post such I think you are out of line to attack someone who might question it’s prudence especially when it is done in what I thought was a thoughtful and respectful way.
I believe I have a very different view of this war than Marty or you. And it’s still evolving as I educate myself more and more on history. And from where I see things now I don’t see ANY of the major players actually trying to resolve the war. Everyone is just digging in while more and more innocents are hurt. Such is war.
In closing, I do sincerely hope the letter has a positive effect.
I think the first step is never do anything to make matters worse. I for one, being a thickheaded New York mick, have trouble applying that rule but I did try very hard to do so for a time and whether I got lucky or not I was reunited with my son. I was also able to get communications delivered on a back channel. The communications were not “entheta” in the least. I don’t want to reveal the back channels I used but my suggestion would be to simply review what you know about the person’s communication lines and see if you can find some way to put “theta” communication on the line.
Perhaps Marty’s open letter will be relayed to the dad by someone close him. If so, my wish is that it has the desired effect and I will be quite glad to be wrong (as I often am).
I think the responses here to Kevin have been very diplomatic. He is coming across as the Grinch.
Such love is a wonderful thing.
How beautiful! Best wishes for you all!
DM? Marty listen. “Mr. Miscavige, your hair is so original. What do you use, salad dressing?” 🙂
Sometimes the important thing, indeed in the end the only important thing, is to speak truth. And particularly to speak truth to power. To bear witness.
In addition, this open letter was brilliant diplomacy. DM and the corporate Church of Scientology have made it clear that the only way the odious policy of Disconnection will be ended is if it costs too much, if the PR cost is too high, if they are repeatedly held up to public censor, disdain, and well earned ridicule. Hell, in that regard Marty’s letter was exceptionally high in ARC and diplomatic.
Finally, as Marty noted, you have no idea what efforts Marty, Mike and Christie have made over the past four years to reunite Christie with her father. You speak from ignorance. You assume, without evidence, that Marty’s open letter is the FIRST thing they have done, rather than the last. Yes, quiet diplomacy should usually be the first resort, and I have absolute certainty that it was here. When quiet diplomacy fails, however, the only resort is public diplomacy, and a public plea for human decency.
— Communicator IC
And in closing, I appreciate that you would like to see a positive outcome result from this. I am sure this is true. And that is all that matters in the end.
A very well written clean communication of the situation. With admiration for those concerned and without anything but the truth. Eddie King now has a very beautiful daughter married to a wonderful gentleman. Eddie should be proud of his daughter’s choice. Best wishes to all!!!
Mike: I fully agree with your last post. I wish Christie & you nothing but the best and truly, truly hope both of you are reunited with all your family in the not too distant future. That would put a big mofo smile on my face.
Kevin, I believe that you sincerely would like to see Christi reunite with her parents. I also believe all diplomacy routes have been exhausted. Diplomacy does not always exist. I therefore believe that your comments are inappropriate, as the only purpose it serves is to make people wrong when they are working very hard at making something right.
Well then I have to say you and Katie did a good job with Brendon. His intelligence startled me when at 7 or 8. He worked for me in AOLA Dept 8.
The department was awarded a Power BofI and declare and his work contributed. I’m glad you two are re-united. Please tell him hello from me.
I once told Christie that years ago I was in cramming when Eddie was Cram off. From his point of view I was busing invalidating my own knowing… not acknowleging what I knew. Couldn’t help noting that it was his turn to stop invalidating what he knows.
Cheers to the bride, groom, family and friends 😉
I didn’t even get it from Marty’s post that Christie’s dad had been disconnected from her by his being effect of RCS suppression. Since I was not aware of the personal circumstances, I sort of got the impression that that Mr. King had passed away, that that Marty was standing in, and that the open letter was sort a poetic tribute to him. It wasn’t until I read the replies from people who know these wonderful people personally that I got the picture. And well, OK. I still think that Marty’s post was a respectful tribute to Mr. King who helped bring this wonderful daughter of his into the world.
Mr. King did not attend his wedding due to unfortunate circumstances which we all understand, and there was and is no effort to make him wrong for that.
So, in light of my new understanding, here’s my communication to Mr. King:
“Eddie, I don’t know you personally. I just know that you have a daughter and two grandsons, as well as a new son in law. Family is an important thing, despite what cynical people might say. You’re a tough guy. I don’t think that getting in touch with them, in itself, could cause you any irreparable harm no matter what anybody else says.
…..However, I DO think that NOT doing so might cause you nearly irreparable harm in your own universe. Just my opinion.
OK, I’ll lighten up: One thing that you must consider tis he strong possibility that if you do not assert you grandfatherly influence soon, Mike may just have those boys playing RUGBY instead of football! 🙂
So, here’s hoping that you just go for it, man.
This is way bigger than any super bowl.
Lawrence: If I were siting on a golden Versace couch, feet up on one of my humiliated but willing slaves and tucking into panda burgers prepared by fine chefs, juvenile insults from my defeated foes would only cheer me up.
Think about it from his point of view.
How do you solve two opposites with negotiations,
diplomacy and mediations when you run into brick
walls at every turn? You, Kevin, obviously had some
strong intention there to make it happen with your
son and let happiness prevail for that outcome. This
is the single time I have seen it happen and does not
in any way mean we can make it a generality. Without
doubt Mike, Marty and Christie have tried many many
avenues to get reconciliation to occur with Eddie and
his daughter. They are also quite “high-powered”
terminals which can help but in this case might also
have been detrimental (cannot set an example with
That LRH did not dig into this type of problem is just
not true as he gave us the ARC triangle and I think
Marty has demonstrated over and over he is using
this to the hilt. There was a think tank in Sweden
many years ago which came up with the solution
to the problems in old Russia when the cold war was
raging. The solution was “education”! Duh! Well, this
blog has given us tons of data we can finally think
with and I think this education has helped a lot of
people extricate themselves from superficial
extremes and settle into a road of reason and a
path of what works and is of benefit to all.
So, education, eh? Dag Hammarskjold, UN Sec.
in the 50’s – 60’s could have negotiated a final
peace in the Middle East but for that one obstacle.
As long as the education of those parts of the world
is colored with extreme views, the best diplomat/
negotiator will get nowhere. Same with radical
Little by little I think we are moving a bit higher.
I will add my postulate with those wanting the madness to end. Weddings are always surrounded with hope. Marty, Mosey you seem to be at the right time and place to bring theta to life you are appreciated. ARC Bill Dupree
Nicely said. Although I think footie (Aussie Rules Football) might be more likely than rugby. 😉
I had the same first reaction that you did as I read Marty’s letter, and then came to realize that disconnection was the reason. And I thought the letter was beautifully written, especially considering it was composed by someone who proclaims that he sucks at diplomacy. LOL! 😀
The best part is that there is so much love and happiness in these present circumstances. Mr. King can rest assured that his daughter and his grandchildren are in the best hands.
… and may you walk along the paths of your lives lit by the warm glow of love and humanity.
Criminals are not anyone or anything, the viewpoint of whom, matters to me at all. This learned from a long life of dealing with people like DM. 🙂
Any criminal deserves what they get, just like their victims did. Is that the viewpoint you mean?
Great post. I hope that Christie and Mike will be able to connect with their family soon. I thought you wrote a really thoughtful, touching message.
That top photo is a great one. It sure seems that you and Christie are happy, content, and joyful in the presence of such good friends and family. You can feel it just looking at the picture.
Congratulations to Christie and Mike, and congratulations to you as well!
What a sweet communication. And palehorse is right. Mike already has Shane watching Aussie Rules Football and loving it.
No Marty; you do not suck at diplomacy. You are a warrior poet!
Yep, we both worked at the Pasadena Mission in the mid-70s. Didn’t know him well but I was really impressed. He seemed like a straight shooter and good guy.
This is pretty awesome.