Leaving the church of Dave Miscavige

Another Texan takes the high road

Honestly, I won’t dignify that organization with the word Scientology.

I recall when going to an org was just fun. My friends were there, it was just a great place to be. There was no regging for anything but the bridge and it was done with ARC from the reg and was done to get you up the bridge. It was honest, it was good.

Fast forward to today.

Quite a difference, huh?

Now, essentially one individual has complete control of the only workable spiritual technology in existence, which is parceled out in such a way that only a tiny percentage of the population is able to avail themselves of it, due to of all things, the size of their wallet.

With that in mind give me a flash answer, what word comes to mind?

Yea, me too.

It seems very odd that of all the things I consume in this life, all the services and goods that pass before me in this existence, that I am to believe that I can ONLY receive spiritual gains from the good ol’ Church of Dave. It’s almost like he is insisting upon a monopoly on the delivery of LRH tech.

Not only that, but one would be lead to believe that only the squirrelyist of squirrels would dare leave the C of D and help his fellows out. Perhaps “squirrel” really means not sending Dave his cut of the action. Of course there are real squirrels out there, but they are easy to spot, easy to check up on. What bugs me is the use of the term to describe anyone not toeing the line, not in the herd, or “part of the group” regardless of the quality of the delivery.

With Marty, I’ve had the privilege of picking up the cans with one hell of a standard auditor on the other end. The difference between what he delivered to me and the herky-jerky crap-o-rama that I was getting from orgs is frankly unbelievable. Marty simply got me through what I needed to do as A to B as one could imagine and I cant help but think as LRH intended.

So a big thanks to Marty and Mosey. Things just are so much better in my life because you, and others like you, gave me an option outside the Church of Dave. And for showing me the new form of the delivery of LRH’s tech, and let me just say I loved every minute of it!

You know, I can’t help but think that as a consequence of our best people being driven out, Dave hasn’t enriched the field with some fantastic auditors, administrators and really the most competent people on the planet. So thanks, we can sure use them in the independent movement.

Just in case there is any doubt in anyone’s mind. I am out of the church, am an Independent Scientologist and I will be continuing on the road to total freedom.

With that settled and as a complete aside, I’ve noticed on this blog a tendency to express one’s thoughts and feelings in the form of a video of favorite or appropriate performances. Why not? We are dealing with the stuff of life and living. From the realization of betrayal to the exuberance of a great session. This is where the artists live.

So here’s mine, for Marty, Mosey and all Independents,

First a definition:

Shambhala (also spelled Shambala or Shamballa) is a mythical kingdom hidden somewhere in Inner Asia. It gradually came to be seen as a fabulous kingdom whose reality is visionary or spiritual as much as physical or geographic.

The words [chorus omitted]:

Wash away my troubles, wash away my pain
With the rain in Shambala
Wash away my sorrow, wash away my shame
With the rain in Shambala
Everyone is helpful, everyone is kind
On the road to Shambala
Everyone is lucky, everyone is so kind
On the road to Shambala
How does your light shine, in the halls of Shambala?
How does your light shine, in the halls of Shambala?

I can tell my sister by the flowers in her eyes
On the road to Shambala
I can tell my brother by the flowers in his eyes
On the road to Shambala
How does your light shine, in the halls of Shambala?
How does your light shine, in the halls of Shambala?


And of course the link:



Byron O. Dawson

Aka: Pissed Wizard

191 responses to “Leaving the church of Dave Miscavige

  1. Hiya, Bryan,

    Looking forward to meeting you in Texas come July Fourth. And looking forward to seeing Marty and Mosey and Mike and Christie and Sam and Jim and Natalie and Veritas and sooo many other of my friends. Can hardly wait! It will be here before we know it.

    Just Me

  2. Simon Bolivar

    -1 but…… on Miscavige side 🙂

  3. I love seeing all these new people — Byron, Bryan, Brian, Bryon — it’s all good so welcome! Also, I really dig the bell-bottoms in the video.

  4. martyrathbun09

    killer b’s.

  5. Bryon — welcome and THANKS for the Shambhala video — I never put two and two together.

    Shambhala (the song) and Shambhala the place.

    Now I am a practicing Shambhala Buddhist (one of the lineages from Tibet).

    Still I never put those two together.

    Dense. Very dense.

    Probably why it took as long as it did for me to leave dm inc 🙂

    Very happy that you are happy!!


  6. Independent Scientologist


    No question that the most capable Scientologists on the planet are in the independent movement. And that’s where we need them to be!

    I also remember when Scientology as practiced in the church was (mostly) lighthearted and fun. I am glad to have those qualities back in my life with the group of independents that are gathering around my wife and I.

    – Ron Matlock

  7. Bryan, you’re gonna love this crowd … and Sarge (I hope you can make it this year) and Tony and Marie-Joe and Brad and Tom (both of ‘em) and Linda and Karen and Bruce and Mike and Steve and Lucy and Haydn and Tiziano and Jamie and Jack and Kathy and Jackie and Silvia and Shannon and Hiro and … oh, heck, you know who you all are!

  8. Uh, uh … Byron! Got it now!

  9. Byron – In your honor – when only the best will do:

  10. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
    Me too!

  11. Congratulations Brian! Oh and one more thing……Thanks for reminding me how much I love Three Dog Night! 🙂

  12. Byron — Welcome to the free world!

    I too recall the orgs of my childhood as places where people wanted to be. Just to hang with friends and like-minded people.

    Casa Tejas is that today.

  13. Killer b’s. 🙂
    Gonna have to start calling myself Idle Org again at this rate!

    Hey Byron. You had me sold at the Three Dog Night, baby! Good stuff. Very apropos. To a classic rock drummer like myself it’s pure heaven.

    But, more importantly, thanks for taking a stand and speaking out, fellow killer b!

  14. Byron,
    Welcome to the Indies! Thanks for the Video and clearing my MU on it, heard the song countless times in the past.

  15. Did you know Mickie McMeel was one of their drummers? Currently still in dm inc., I believe. Started at CCLA early 70’s — already was gone from Three Dog Night.

    A very nice guy.


  16. Yo, Bryan and Byron,
    Long time ago I had one date with Mickey McMeel, a Three Dog Night drummer. Nice guy. We went to a movie at Grauman’s Chinese Theatre. He was, I think, a Scientologist.
    Which reminds me, I also had a date once with Trey Lotz (hi, Trey!). As everyone knows, Trey is a super nice guy. I still remember … we went to that wonderful old Los Feliz Italian restaurant (Ristorante Palermo?) with the old guys who sung Italian opera.
    It’s such a small town.

  17. one of those who see

    Hi Byron,
    wonderful picture of two keyed out guys!!! Auditor and PC, the way it should be. Big smile on my face!!
    I too remember hanging at the mission where I got into Scientology and not wanting to leave. Recently reconnected with an old tech terminal from those days. Wonderful. We’ve been talking for hours. After one of the phone calls I told him it was great to be back in the theta universe with him again! He felt the same way. And it is like that on this blog too. Out of the DM machine and into the theta.
    Have fun Byron and thanks so much for your statement!
    Hugs accross the miles to both of you.

  18. I have total reality on the whole squirrel thing being thrown around. I was told “make sure you don’t have Tiziano Lugli on your Facebook either, he’s a squirrel” and I knew damn well that this DSA didn’t know Tiziano or even heard of him. I’m completely disgusted how people inside CofM do 100% the opposite of what LRH said about look don’t listen. Their motto is “Listen to Cob, no need to look.” Puke.

  19. Tony DePhillips


  20. Marty, I broke a rib laughing ….

    And now as I recover, I’ll mention there are a few Toms here, though. Not the turkey types!

  21. Welcome Byron! I too remember and miss the days where it was fun to be at the org.

  22. I knew him as Michael in the mid-90’s in LA while I was on lines. Wonderful being!

  23. Tony DePhillips

    Welcome Byron to the Indies!!
    Found a different version of Shamballa which could be viewed as an analogy of getting out of the cult of dave. A bit scary at first then it is a whole lot of fun!!

  24. Byron,
    Howdy and welcome from West Texas! I loved your write up and song choice.
    Hope to see you at the Bar-B-Que in July. ml, Laura

  25. Cindy Pinsonnault

    Hi Byron! Love what you wrote. Love the song. And yay! for Texas – I think you might have put us back in the lead again!

  26. Yvonne Schick

    Dear Byron,

    Very well done on your decision and announcement. Enjoy your new life. There is quite a result to be attained from the de-PTSing process of leaving DM’s group. You will enjoy.

    Thank you also for the well chosen musical selection. There is still nothing that compares with the classics from the 60’s & 70’s in my book.

    ml, Yvonne

  27. Hi Ron and Michelle and our other Cincinnati friends,

    I agree.

    We will carry on!

    ML, Tom Gallagher

  28. Freedom Fighter

    Wahoo!! Another Texan has escaped the walls of DeMonology!! VWD and welcome!

    What many on the inside don’t realize is that those walls aren’t as formidable as they think they are. One only needs to make the decision to be either on the side of LRH or on the side of he who, through much slight of hand and smoke and mirros, has made them think the path they are headed down is the road to total freedom.

    Just ask yourself, “am I truly doing better now than I was doing 5, 10, 15, 20 years ago?” or “am I where I thought I would be by now?” If the answer is no, I got news for you: the problem isn’t you. The problem is the path you’ve been lead down. LRH laid out the path very specifically and very succinctly. If you’re still in the Church of Miscavige, you’re on the wrong path.

  29. Awesome! More Texans!

    Between the Texans and the Northwesterners, we’re getting these guys surrounded!

    By the way, thanks for the 3 Dog Night. I echo my friends here. I, too, had hair and a tan like that once! That song came out when I was very heavily involved with my mission, and it always brings back fond memories of spreading my wings as a human and as an auditor.

  30. martyrathbun09

    Tom Toms

  31. Dear Byron Dawson,

    Thank you for such a succinct, Cliff Notes style of written thoughts that reflect my own views. So much so that I feel a LFBD

    The photo above of you and Marty when blown up says it all.

    I need to make a reservation.


    Respectfully yours, Tom Gallagher

  32. You’re fun.

  33. Tony Dephillips

    Wild horses couldn’t keep us away.

  34. Welcome Byron! Looking forward to meeting you at the 2011 Indy Celebration. Holy moly we’re gearing up for a party the size of Texas!!!!

  35. Hi Byron! Welcome and thank you for taking a stand! 🙂 🙂
    Now, send me your email address so I can send you an invitation for the 4th of July party – 2011indyday@hushmail.com. Thanks, man.

  36. Scott Campbell

    Hey Pissed Wizard,

    Welcome. Wizards are always useful and interesting (if somewhat mischievous) kind of beings.

    Here’s some rock and roll for ya’.

  37. Scott Campbell

    Les try tha again.

  38. Here’s a favorite.
    (for independent minded folks that is)

  39. Gonna need a bigger lake……

  40. The Killer B’s. Love it.

    Byron- I dig your message. Great Pic too. Love the Texas vibe. It radiates freedom, games, and self determinsim.

    All the best,


  41. Welcome, sir Byron.

    I do appreciate the sensation of another freed Operatin’ Texan coming out to play!

    Fantastic choice of song. It was the second song that ever spoke to me in some kind of spiritual fashion. The first was “Spirit in the Sky”.

    Bruce Pratt

  42. The Palermo was still there last year while the building was undergoing remodeling…

  43. But I’ll bet LA is in the unknown lead for the most wanna-be Indies! LOL

  44. I just want to add “luv to ya’ll”

  45. Ingrid smith

    Is there some smart water in Texas? I’m beginning to have a whole new respect for that part of the country. Welcome to the party Byron!

  46. Tony DePhillips

  47. Pissed Wizard

    I already feel right at home, its a wizard thing…
    And don’t worry everyone gets to say/spell my name a couple times, before I get….

  48. Pissed Wizard

    I can honestly say Ive never been likened to an insect before.

  49. Pissed Wizard

    Thank you so much for the warm welcome, these are really the best people on the planet.

  50. Pissed Wizard

    Thank you so much! Another Queen fan!
    This is so cool. Im feeling less pissed all the time.

  51. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks, I like them too. Use to listen to them all the time.

  52. Pissed Wizard

    Thank you, look forward to meeting you and the other independents in July.

  53. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks for the welcome, glad you like the video.

  54. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks for the great ack. Once out everything is so effortless and fun again. Hugs right back at ya.

  55. JM.. Wasn’t it Salerno’s… West side of road south of Los Feliz Blvd, on Hillhurst? One of several popular places the org culture frequented back in the 70s. House of Pies anyone? Ha!

  56. Pissed Wizard

    I really like that, think Ill print it on T – shirts or something.
    But lets turn it around “Don’t Look, just listen (to COB)”

  57. Pissed Wizard


  58. Pissed Wizard

    That was great! Thanks Tony!
    Hey I sort of get a memory of your name as I read it.
    Were you ever in San Diego?

  59. Pissed Wizard

    Thank you ‘mam, I will certainly be at the BBQ.

  60. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks Cindy, whats the score?

  61. Pissed Wizard

    Yvonne, thank you so much for your ack. I had some time ago noticed that the many in the C of D actually liked seeing people at effect and enjoyed creating a suppressive environment. Just being off those lines can make a huge resurgence in case I am sure.

    As far as the music goes, your tastes are as refined as my own 🙂

  62. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks FF!
    I could not agree with you more.

  63. Those Texans sure know how to stand tall. Welcome BYRON.
    The way you write your name you could be considered a bit Irish too.
    Now, that ain’t all bad either. Good on saying it like it is.

  64. Thank you, Byron O. Dawson!

  65. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks! Glad you liked the selection. We wont discuss my hair during that time, my daughter may read this thing.

  66. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks Tom!
    I try to make stuff I wouldnt mind reading, the problem is I cant write worth a darn.
    Anyway get onto your next step, or get cleaned up or whatever.
    Find a good auditor and go for it, you already know how great Marty is. But whoever you go to, he/she has GOT to be better than the C of D’s guys!

  67. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks Shannon, party?
    Toga, toga, toga, toga…..

  68. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks! Already sent you an email.
    Look forward to meeting you and yours.

  69. Pissed Wizard

    Thank you Scott.
    I perceive that you have crossed paths with my brethren.
    Fear not, well ok, fear just a little. But you are right we are extreamly useful.

    Thanks for the extra rock, there’s no such thing as too much ROCK AND ROLL

  70. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks Brian,
    Good to hear you liked the post.

  71. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks FT!
    Do you mean Lord Byron?
    English poet 22 January 1788 – 19 April 1824, um, just a thought.

    Anyway I like the Operating (sorry) Operatin’ Texan bit.

    And its good to know you guys like Three Dog Night, I truely feel at home here.

  72. Pissed Wizard

    Just one more thing folks, I’d like to thank and acknowledge my wonderful wife Yolanda for staying sane when I wasn’t. For keeping going when I couldn’t. For all the countless things that she did to get me through the unending crap that life sometimes seems to enjoy throwing at me.

    Thank you so much.

  73. Look out DM!
    Coming through!

  74. Bryon,

    Awesome song, I had never heard Shambhala before despite being familiar with Three Dog Night. Welcome to freedom!


  75. Well done Byron!

    Having worked with you and being your friend for 20 years I would describe you as a wise, self determined “wizard” and one of the most competent people I ever met.

    I’m really glad to see you had the chance to visit Marty (another power house)
    and you are on a roll. Enjoy!

  76. Oops, I meant Byron … looks as if I wasn’t the first to make that mistake either.

  77. Byron,
    You said “Im feeling less pissed all the time.” That was one of my many wins working with Marty. When I went there I was really pissed at some people. When I left my more pan-determined viewpoint allowed me a little more compassion. I never expected that! Anyway, I don’t want to mushy up the blog but, I’m really happy for you! ml, Laura

  78. Laura Ann,

    Mushy is good. Isn’t that when a solidity begins to dissolve?


  79. Welcome Byron, job well done!

  80. Sarno’s, I think it was. Actually on Vermont, south of Los Feliz, as I remember. The customers would sometimes stand up during dinner and sing opera.

    Up the street a few blocks was Palermos. Best pizza anywhere around, in my opinion.

    A frequent libs destination for me.


  81. Byron,

    Considering the tendency of that group to alter definitions for the benefit of its leader, maybe we should just call it “The Animal Farm.” Orwell sure had an insight into what DM wants Scientology to become. If he had understood Scientology, maybe “1984” would have been even more horrific.


    ps: when were you in San Diego?

  82. I think the UK gets that prize.

  83. Hey, Byron … Welcome to the Independents! Nice photo, writeup and song. Also, great ack of your wife. Lots of “B” names coming out recently so I’ll probably remember you best by your handle, Pissed Wizard. And, you may call me H.

  84. Friend of Ron


    Thanks for standing up and speaking out!

    I also recall when going to an org was just fun, full of friends and a great place to be.

    In my first org, Munich 1973, Div 6 was so packed on the weekends that you could not find a chair to sit on.

    In my last org, OC 2010, Div 6 was so empty that I could pick any chair I wanted as I was the only one on course most of the nights.

    The THEN with LRH in the Church of Scientology
    The NOW with “dear fuehrer” in the Church of MissSavage

    And here we are creating the THEN again and a whole new NOW……:)

  85. Byron, welcome to the Independents. Great to see you here and I enjoyed your story. Thanks for speaking out.

  86. Welcome Byron, Glad to have you with us. Yes, the good old days. We’ll have them back again soon.

    ML Tom

  87. Bulletproof,
    Small world, I worked at Sarno’s as a waitress in the early 70’s. The food was really good!

  88. OUT,
    Yes, you are right. ml, Laura

  89. TroubleShooter

    Cob has so successfully created an atmosphere wherein questioning HIM and his actions is equal to betraying LRH. The nerve of that little #*cker. The one thing that I never suspected, cob at the helm of destroying Scientology. I take no comfort in knowing that better men than I remain blinded by his artful manipulations and forked tongue.

    I’ve realized that the spinny effects I’ve felt as I’ve withdrawn from the suppression is as great as it is because of the importance and significance that I put into my nearly three decades since arriving on the road LRH laid out. I’d reached a destination long sought.

    My reaction as I’ve observed is connected to his suppressive efforts – still PTS to him to some extent. He’s created a trap where leaving it is rigged with booby traps where purpose and self-confidence are strained beyond limits for many. One can either kill themselves (mostly figuratively) with the self-listing on non-standard listing questions – e.g. Why did this happen? What’s wrong with me? Why am I so stupid? What did I do wrong? Why can’t someone stop him? Why does he get away with it? Why is my goodness and purpose so weak that his evil wins? Why am I so evil that I see him as evil? Who are the real bad guys? Why are the VIIs, VIIIs and SO members following him so willing to be told not to look? Why can’t they see how far away from LRH policy the church has gone? Though I know better than to take these up with myself I have had them flicker in and out of my space like flies. These questions, my life in the church, it’s sometimes like the flame is about to flicker out that I was wrong when I felt like the end of my search and beginning of my purpose had been found in the first place.

    I can observe the sad effect in play but it doesn’t bring me any FN. Haven’t I already invested enough of my life to something that feels like it’s over?

    Then there’s a new posting on Marty’s blog like Byron’s or a comment that inspires or data learned that blows a little more charge and I think there’s no way I’m going to leave this game – fuck him and all the robots…some real uptoned anger or antagonism kicks in.

    I read pc wins like yours Byron and I smile and the peaceful feeling of knowing that I did find what I was looking for that the group I was looking for is becoming more clearly defined and is emerging. Then my space gets bigger again and the flicker becomes the flame.

    It’s true that this roller coaster is in part due to the fact that I haven’t fully disconnected myself from that which cob has perverted. That he has perverted is clear to me. That I won’t give him or his perversion of LRH’s intention power to wreak any further destruction in my life prevents me from coming out. It’s complicated. Something not being confronted for sure but I haven’t found my solution yet to take my life fully back again without damages that I’m not going to allow. That’s my duty now.

    Thanks for listening. Byron thanks for the light and breezy of your wins and Marty I’m doing the best I can with what I’ve got.

  90. Tony DePhillips

    Yes I was on staff there for a couple of years. I was there in the early 80’s. I know Larry Hanson (dropped his body), Chuck and Ann Lindsay, Ruth Knudson, Marty Herack. Any of those names ring a bell?

  91. Tony DePhillips

    I think Seattle still holds the title…Lol.
    Marty are you keeping track of the “birthday game standings?” 🙂

  92. Mr. Wizard: by any chance are you related to Tim the Enchanter ?

    Michael A. Hobson

  93. (Leaked from Int…)

    Religious Technology Center
    Office of Chairman of the Board

    COB Directive
    To: Everyone
    Confidential***High Security


    The Blind are still leading the Blind, no one is getting it, stats are down worldwide, parishioners are leaving left and right, celebrities are blowing, my suits are wearing out, therefore the following goes into effect immediately if not sooner:

    1. All staff and parishioners are to sign the “I Renounce Marty” pledge.

    2. After recalculating the time necessary to Clear the planet, the Sea Org contract is hereby lengthened to Five Billion Years.

    3. There’s been no change in anything by putting public through the Basics, so after completing Objectives everyone is ordered onto the Revamp Rundown consisting of:

    a. Going outside and being body-routed back in.
    b. Watch all the intro videos.
    c. Becoming aghast at the prices.
    d. Re-do Basic Books, this time clay-demoing each and every word in every book three times.
    e. Lengthy and grueling Sec Check.
    f. Six month checks for all public on any level or service.

    4. All empty chairs in course rooms are to be removed as soon as the Sup says, “Start”.

    5. The use of pork in any manner, including the word ‘pork’, pork rinds, bacon, bacon-cheeseburgers, pork ribs, pork roast, ham, black pudding, pigs ear, Slim Jims, hot dogs, salami, bologna, sausage, pepperoni, pork pate, head cheese or watching Porky Pig cartoons are hereby banned from use in all Scientology as it has been found to be offensive to members of the Nation of Islam.

    6. So as to be on the same terms as the rest of us, a Public RPF is hereby put into effect, mandatory for any ethics infraction of any kind by anyone at any level.

    7. Public objections to the Public RPF will be met by assigning the complainer to the Public RPF’s RPF whereupon they are to be stationed inside the restroom at attention holding a hand towel when they are not cleaning.

    8. Objections to the Public RPF’s RPF will be met by assigning the culprits to the Public RPF’s RPF’s RPF whereby they are to be stationed dressed as a gnome at the front door and their sole duty is to act as a doorstop.

    9. All female Sea Org members are to shave their heads bald immediately as a symbolic gesture of compliance. RTC females are to have the RTC lightning bolts tattooed on the sides of their heads.

    10. Armed guards are to be posted around the stage at all my events, with a scope spotter and sniper inside the pillars in case an attack is made on me.

    11. Anything and everything that Marty Rathbun or Mike Rinder touched at the Int Base is to be torn down, burned and reconstructed as it has been discovered that their left over DNA residue causes inexplicable enturbulation.

    12. Everyone is to be sec-checked immediately as per the following:

    a. Are you planning on leaving and joining the Independents?
    b. Do you use the word, ‘Independent’?
    c. Do you know anyone named ‘Marty’?
    d. Has anyone contacted you about anything?
    e. If you were allowed to think for yourself, what would you be thinking?
    f. Could anyone accuse you of thinking disloyally about COB or Tom Cruise?
    g. Are you jealous of COB? Why not?
    h. Do you wish you were COB?
    i. Do you owe the IRS any money?
    j. Do you have any money or assets you’ve failed to disclose?

    13. A new Church Credit Union is hereby established whereby all public, old and new, are to be loaned the money for their next service as long as they’ve depleted all their assets. Proof required. Interest rate is 65% APR, minimum monthly payment to be 92% of the person’s income with penalties for late payments or failure to include a thank you note to COB with each payment.

    14. For the month of April, public who donate their children to the Sea Org will be given their next service at no charge.

    15. Rescuing blown Scientologists from the grips of the Independents and getting them back into the Church for handling qualifies for a reward of their choice of seats in the Academy and a free demo kit.

    16. It is now forbidden for anyone in the Sea Org to remain named ‘Marty’ or ‘Trey’. A 24 hour TM is in effect for their names to be changed.

    17. Anyone found snickering at COB’s new Simon Bolivar uniform is to be instantly found guilty of mutiny.

    18. The phonetic sound ‘mike’ is no longer allowed to be uttered in the Gold studios.

    19. The phonetic sound ‘tray’ is no longer allowed to be voiced in any mess hall or canteen in any Sea Org org.

    20. Staff discovered objecting to this program are to be banished to the org in Plymouth, England. Any public found objecting are to clay demo the entirety of the Simon Bolivar policy letter three times with final checkout by RTC via Skype.


  94. TroubleShooter,
    We’ve all been there and are there to greater or lesser degree.
    You should know that it does get better.
    In fact, I’d say you are a zillion times stronger now for knowing what you know and confronting what you are confronting.
    I know it’s hard to see that while in the middle, but it is true.
    Reach out to people you know are safe. Connect up as much as possible.
    And keep the faith brother. (or sister lol)

  95. Kathy Braceland

    A big warm hello and welcome Byron! All that wonderful fun stuff you talked about is right here.

  96. Pissed Wizard

    Yes Tony, I remember all of them, I was PCO there for a while.

  97. TS
    That little flicker turned into a roaring flame for a moment there!
    Keep that flame alive and take comfort in the fact that you have many many friends here and we totally get what you are saying.

  98. Very nice to meet ya, Byron! 🙂
    Must be some deeper meaning to all my exes live in Texas…

  99. Oh snap! Luv that sec check…has me line charging and VVGIs! 😆

  100. Thanks for sharing this comment, TS. I wish to assure you (and reassure you) that you are definitely not alone in your observations and what you believe to be true. After reading your comment, I take comfort in knowing I also am not alone. Thank you … H

  101. theo Sismanides

    Byron, you are good. I read your post. It’s to the point. Yes, you got it. So many good administrators, auditors and players out here. This is THE point. I am so happy seeing you next to Marty with your hat on!!!

    This is the place where Scientology gets to be Free!! And we are becoming more and more! Thanks for standing out!

  102. TS — you’re a brother or sister in arms.

    Thanks for writing. That was impinging. The thought of you going all sudden gave me chills — the good kind.

    Wise fella, generally respected in these parts, did comment upon the fact that gradients are necessary for problem definition and solution. Good comment. Seems you understand that too.

    The net is here. We have triage too, especially, but by no means exclusively, in Texas.

    Bruce Pratt

  103. Tony Dephillips

    I think I remember you now. Is it possible that one time when you got some new tennis shoes that you said” I just got some new tires? ” That’s obscure I realize but I can remember you saying that. I was in the Navy till 1980 and I married Judy Flaig whowas on staff also.

  104. From the 9 July 1963 “The Free Being” lecture:

    “The point I am making here-the point I am making here is the use of intelligence with force can maintain a freedom of action, and so on, without racking up a new bank, without racking up new overts, without the war again turning entirely against one.
    There’s never been a lasting or intelligent society of free beings. You say, how could you have a society of free beings? Well, in the first place, you can’t do without a society of free beings. That is to say, it’s all very well for everybody to be totally on his own, but look where this gets everybody. It gets everybody downscale in the long run so that it doesn’t work. ….” – LRH

    The point being, there is no need to expend Karma points committing O\W’s on DM. At the end of the day, what would you have salvaged anyway? Better yet is to learn the tech of Freeing Beings, and applying it to those who actually want it….

  105. The flow out of the DM orgs and into the pro-LRH indy field continues. I was away for a vacation and in that short time I see two new stellar beings have joined – Byron, and I just read about Mike Roiger, former Senior C/S at Flag who left recently and whose story is found on Thoughtful’s blog.

    I always never could find a good reason to be back from a vacation. Events like these are the exception.

    What great news!


  106. Very well done Bryan!!
    Welcome to our big family!!

    Silvia Kusada

  107. Nice post, TS. Really liked it. Also sounds like your back is up!

  108. one of those who see


  109. Great new A-J Check, applies to all Kool Aid drinkers, not just staff!

  110. one of those who see

    Hi Byron,
    Here is 3 Dog Night’s cover of “Easy to Be Hard” from “Hair”
    Very appropriate lyrics to the scene in the Church as well.

  111. I think I’ve had that one! 😉

  112. Pissed Wizard

    Hi Ingrid! thanks, good to be here.
    As far as smart water goes…. well… it seems to me that there is a great deal of smarts hanging around this blog.

  113. Just Me, I’ll be there or be square. Love

  114. Pissed Wizard

    Funny you should mention the Irish, I most certainly am, right Marty?
    And thanks, you all make me feel so welcome!

  115. Pissed Wizard

    You are most welcome, what does you nick mean?

  116. Pissed Wizard

    Ha! Oh man that’s good, you are a girl after my own heart!!!

  117. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks Rob! Everyone here is so kind 🙂

  118. Byron, the phenomena you speak of is what Electra called “The Cog Tax” in a 1991 essay that was posted online anonymously.

    Part 1: http://www.freezoneearth.org/electra/exm01.html
    Part 2: http://www.freezoneearth.org/electra/exm02.html

  119. Pissed Wizard

    Hey Mat!

    How goes everything?
    Yolanda says hello.

    Actually Ive got to tell you, that when we found out you got declared, it was the outpoint that broke the camel’s back. That is to say when I found out, the thinking was never “what did Mat do?” it was “what asshole declared Mat”. That was it, I had to know what was going on. So really again it was little Dave that got so nuts that he sent up yet another flare telling people something was really wrong with the church. I saw it and so did many other people.

    Just don’t let this go to your head:)


  120. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks Erwin!

  121. one of those who see

    oops. I wrote “Very appropriate lyrics to the scene in the Church as well.”
    I should have written:
    Where “Shambhala” is for the Indies. Beautiful.

    “Easy to be Hard” tells of the scene in the Church. Where dedicated Sea Org staff are invalidated and degraded, RPFed for years, separated from Family. Where declares and horrific forced disconnections are happening. Where the state of clear is invalidated. Where people who are not illegal pc’s are told NO you can not get auditing here etc…

    What a beautiful voice the lead singer has.

  122. Pissed Wizard


    I was in the Animal Farm for 9 years, thought in nowhere near the intensity that Marty and many others experienced it. I just saw outpoint after outpoint. The redefinition of terms was certainly there, there was also a redefinition of policy made by omitting context. My favorite example is “the public know us by our mest”, which is used to reg donations for the Idle Orgs, but is really from a PL where LRH is appealing to staff to keep their orgs clean, as in swept and dusted.

    I was in SD from ’79 to ’84.


  123. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks H,

    This really seems to be such a great group to be in. I will certainly be keeping the nick here.

  124. Bryon, sir.
    I did not mistype — I’ve been known to butcher the language from time to time.

    That other fellow is a luminary of a different sort and while there are some similarities, a primary difference is you will attend 4 July festivities.


  125. Pissed Wizard


    As I told Marty, guess its about time to take my fair share of the heat.

    And you are so right about how empty the orgs are. I just got a story about an old friend’s 2D going into the org for the first time. He was starting on his basics, as directed, he liked it and was doing the Dianetics course. Then before he even had much in the way of wins, they were asking him about how much money he had and if he had credit cards. He never returned. This is not made up, this happened. I would imagine it happens quite a bit.

    And if you go down to the Dallas org, you know the one that just won the birthday game, and count bodies, you may well be amazed at their absence.

  126. Pissed Wizard

    My pleasure Carol.

  127. Pissed Wizard


    Thanks, its good to be here.
    The early days were really great and I treasure them.
    But when all is said and done, we will look back at this point in time and think to ourselves: yea thats when it all started, those were days…

  128. OTDT,

    Aside being hilarious, these two were especially chilling because they sum up so much of what is wrong:

    “e. If you were allowed to think for yourself, what would you be thinking?”

    14. For the month of April, public who donate their children to the Sea Org will be given their next service at no charge.”

    Scary. Another hit for a master satirist. Jonathan Swift, step aside.

  129. Pissed Wizard


    Thanks for taking the time to express what you are going through.
    You already know what you need to do, just find a way to get away from that crap and you’ll be halfway there.
    You have all our best wishes, never give up.


  130. 🙂 All I know is that I had a lot more of it then than I do now!

  131. Pissed Wizard

    (Oh god that’s good, I love that movie!)
    To answer your question, yes, he’s my cousin.

  132. Pissed Wizard

    Thank you so much Slivia 🙂

  133. Great post Byron.
    Good to *MEET * you.

  134. martyrathbun09

    An Irish Texan no less – and you know how I feel about that breed of cat.

  135. “3a Going outside and being body routed back in”
    This had me rolling on the floor. How do you do this??? OMG my side hurt!

  136. Welcome Bryon!
    Yes, I too remember when it was fun to be at the Church. And I also remember actually going up the bridge!
    But your right in that all the truly trained (non squirrel types) are now in the Independent field. Maybe we should send Dave a Thank You note. 🙂

  137. I take exception to #14. Some of us gave our children freely, thinking they would be in the best group on the planet. Sad turn of affairs.

    Now that’s off my mind, yes, it’s funny too.

  138. Oh, it’s for everyone.

  139. Byron,

    Thanks for the compliment.

    Tell Yolanda that I said “HI” back.
    – – – – – – – – –
    For those that have not met Yolanda yet, she is one of the sweetest people you will ever meet. I would describe her as kind and honest


  140. Hey, this post is for OSA to read. Last night a friend of mine had her email hacked and OSA sent all her email contacts a crude email, trying to discredit her or whatever.

    Today I am making sure all my non-Scientologist friends hear about it and the hilarious answer I thought of. Might as well take the opportunity to turn the church’s smear tactics on them. ROFL here.

  141. Pissed Wizard

    thats a sec checking offence you know

  142. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks Kathy, yes it is all here.

  143. TroubleShooter

    Sam, H, FT, JM and Byron,

    Your comm is much appreciated.

  144. TroubleShooter


    I totally agree with you that I’m much better off for knowing what I know and fortunately your advice to reach to people who are safe is possible as I do know a half-dozen who are under-the-radar and done done done with Demonology that I can talk to and then there’s several fully out who have been supportive too. It’s a bit invalidating of my abilities to not just be able to make it work out faster than it is. I’m not a patient person by nature.

    I really appreciate your supportive comment.

  145. martyrathbun09

    You’re not half bad either Mat.

  146. Pissed Wizard

    Ha ha, yes, thanks Tara

  147. LOL. Me too!

  148. (Fresh leak…)

    Religious Technology Center
    Technical Office of COB

    29 March 2011


    1. Do you ever have any thoughts other than those allowed by COB?

    2. Have you ever refused to be a shill in a reg cycle?

    3. Have you ever avoided going to an event?

    4. Have you ever spent money on personal things when you should have donated it to the Church?

    5. Have you ever blamed anyone in the Church for anything?

    6. Do you have any disagreements with COB?

    7. Are you or are you not in awe of Tom Cruise?

    8. Have you ever failed to put others ethics in when they complained about the prices?

    9. Do you complain about the prices?

    10. Have you ever failed to buy the new release at an event?

    11. What makes you think you’re so Clear?

    12. Don’t you feel you still need more objectives?

    13. Do you have any engrams?

    14. Do you still make others wrong?

    15. Are your eyes bad?

    16. How many fingers am I holding up behind my back?

    17. If you were Clear, how could you help COB?

    18. How soon could you improve your IAS status?

    19. Do you ever feel guilty for not donating enough?

    20. Do you know anyone who’s Clearer than you?

    Failure to pass this Clear Check is to result in the PC being put back on NED, after Objectives, after Basic Books, after Ethics Conditions after being thoroughly Sec Checked after increasing their IAS status.


  149. Personally, I love the way this one almost immediately starts with cross orders:

    To: Everyone
    Confidential***High Security



  150. #3 is already on the real list.

  151. And the paragraph at the bottom is called Standard Case Programming.

  152. OTDT, I do not think the new COB program goes far enough. I would amend it to read:

    1. All IAS members in good standing are hereby declared provisional SP’s due to the present statcrash of magnitudes, the likes of which the world has never seen.

    2. Provisional SP’s may reapply for readmission to the group only by donating $1,000,000 per letter to do A-E. A-E consists of five letters: A, B, C, D, E. Therefore, A-E requires a $5,000,00 donation. However, the “COB Forgiveness Package” may be purchased for $2.5 million and A-E bypassed.

    3. All Scientologists who knew Mike and/or Marty at any time on the wholetrack are hereby declared SP’s for all of Eternity and then some.

    4. Beatings, Omitted: Scientologists who know they deserve a COB beating and omitted to receive it are to report for their mandatory beating.

    5. Sculpted brass busts of COB are being shipped to all Scientologists. The donation is $20,000. All Scientologists are to bow and pray to the COB holy image seven times daily. The COB prayer:

    “Our COB who art in Gold
    David be thy name
    Thy COBness come
    Thy will be done
    In Orgs as it is in Hemet

    “Give us this day our daily beating
    And sec check us for overts
    As we sec check others
    And write KR’s about them to you

    “Lead us not into rationality
    But deliver us from sanity
    For thine is the madness,
    the raging narcissism,
    and the Tom Cruise’s best friend
    forever and ever


  153. Two thumbs up Byron

    You guys on the picture, look so Happy!

  154. Seriously?

  155. OTDT,
    Who the fuck are you? Aaron Sorkin?

  156. No. LOL

  157. OTDT,
    Once again, you’ve nailed it! Just hilarious! What a talent you have – capturing the outpoints with your verbal caricatures. I love your contributions.

  158. Yahoo! Another Texan!

  159. Tony DePhillips

    Hi Tara,
    Could you tell me what “Oh snap!” means? I have seen it used a few times on different blogs now and I have an MU on it.

  160. I love that song, the road to Shambhala … so joyful. As is that photo. Theta is as theta does. 🙂 And isn’t TA the best ‘movement’ ever? 😀

  161. lyrics

    Come my restoration, wash my body clean.
    I’ve been walking a long and crooked path
    Where the walls have fallen
    And broken me in half…

    I’m telling you,
    I will not rest ’til I lay down my head.

    I shall not cry for the blind mind I leave behind.

    I’ll make my way
    Oh it’s gonna be such a beautiful day
    In the house of stone and light
    Oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah
    Let me in, beneath my skin
    Oh oh in the house of stone and light

    It’s been too long my spirit’s been at war

    Come the day I awake the child inside
    In the house of stone and light

    When I go I will o-o-open my eyes
    In the house of stone and light
    I will see you in the house of stone and light

    I’m going inside
    Stone and light
    Looking for a child

    In the house of stone and light…

    I must go there to find my soul, yeah

    – Martin Page

  162. “I shall not cry for the blindman I leave behind.
    When I go in the house of stone and light, yeah
    In the house of stone and light…

    Holy lady show me my soul.
    Tell me of that place where I must surely go.
    Old man waiting at the gates for me
    Give me the wisdom, give me the key!”

  163. Oh snap! Kinda like “you got told” or -A term that seconds the taunting, comeback, and/or verbal abuse of another person.”
    -(exclamatory phrase) a playful indication of surprise, misfortune, or insult popularized by Tracy Morgan of Saturday Night Live, OH SNAP is seemingly derivative of oh no you didn’t where an insulted person, for example a guest of Jerry Springer or often a spunky African American woman contends the insult being made against him/her. While derivative of “oh no you di-int,” OH SNAP has more of an emphasis on playfulness and can be said by people other than those being insulted.

  164. Pissed Wizard

    Unfreakingreal, yes that was me.

  165. Pissed Wizard

    I sit corrected.

  166. Pissed Wizard

    theo, you are so welcome, it’s always a pleasure to be part of a great group

  167. Pissed Wizard

    Thank you so much Centurion, again I am struck by the tone of this group, it really is cool to be here.

  168. Pissed Wizard

    yes pretty good on the positioning, also I have myself seen the dramo they got going, I call it a suppressive can’t have myself

  169. Hi JM,
    That certainly brought back some pleasure moments!
    Good music, good food, and good company.
    What could be better!

  170. Pissed Wizard

    wow… I hadn’t read that before

  171. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks, good to meet you as well!

  172. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks TB, I was considering sending him a nice thank you note but I couldn’t lay my hands on any plutonium

  173. Just as long as you’re not (more) pissed. 🙂

  174. Pissed Wizard

    thetalibre, hey thanks, there’s a reason we look so happy, WE ARE!

  175. Pissed Wizard

    Lucy, shouldnt that be Yeehaa?
    I cant find my dictionary, maybe youre right…

  176. Pissed Wizard

    glad you like the song, an yes indeed TA is the best movement ever

  177. Now, essentially one individual has complete control of the only workable spiritual technology in existence, which is parceled out in such a way that only a tiny percentage of the population is able to avail themselves of it, due to of all things, the size of their wallet.

    I have yet to see any LRH mandate that gives a particular small clique permanent and complete control of all of Scientology.

    Surely they should be subject to group Action, Investigation and Election no different than any other religious & corporate board.

    What makes DM & Cohorts think they own the Subject of Scientology? I doubt LRH issued it to them specifically for regulation.

    Self-Destruction of the Church is measured in statistical terms of Freezone/Independent Expansion.

    This is an overall extremely well-written piece.


  178. Tony Dephillips

    Thanks Tara.
    Excellent explanation.

  179. Pissed Wizard

    You seem to have hit the proverbial nail quite squarely.
    And thanks, I liked writing this bit.

  180. Byron,
    Welcome to the real world. This is the world of OT and the real application of theta-mest theory. Once you withdraw from the impact you are renewed and ready to give life another full go-around.

  181. Ok, this could rival OTDT well done! Especially the squirreled lord prayer!

  182. Oh good one!

  183. It’s good to be in the company of kingpins.

  184. You can’t amend COB Directives. That’s squirrel.

  185. Pissed Wizard

    Thanks SA,
    I do feel very refreshed and ready to play!

  186. Thanks again for the laughing therapy session.

  187. Glad to see you’re out Byron O. Dawson.

  188. Pingback: That feeling of being lost. « SILVIA KUSADA's Blog

  189. Pingback: Ziba Feulner – OT VIII | Der Treffpunkt

  190. Pingback: Proč se církev bojí internetu | independent beings

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