I’ve never met anyone who met Hy Levy who didn’t like him. I feel the same way. Hy took the time to write a fairly lengthy account of his decades in the church. He provides a very interesting look at the internal workings of the Flag Service Organization in particular. While longer than most posts, I think it is well worth the read. Welcome Hy! It is great to have you with us.
My name is Hy Levy.
I was staff at FSO for almost 24 years and routed out in June 2009. I have been “under the radar” since then but now I have decided to take a stand, as my silence has helped to support the current DM regime too long.
Here is my story. I hope it doesn’t bore you. It wasn’t boring living it.
I got into Scientology in 1974 when a San Francisco Org Foundation staff member, who was moonlighting where I worked, gave me a contact assist when I injured myself on a piece of old equipment that malfunctioned.
She saw I was in pain and asked if she could do something that might help.
I said “YES!!!ANYTHING!!”. She gave me a contact assist that produced results in seconds that I couldn’t explain with all my knowledge of the physical sciences.
I was a computer programmer at the time and was very MEST oriented (not in terms of accumulated MEST as I had almost none) in my view of life. Everything was explained by the physical sciences. I was raised an orthodox Jew but had stopped practicing years before and had NO belief in anything spiritual. I felt the only answers were in the physical universe where you could see, touch, feel or measure them quantitatively. Nothing else had any meaning or value.
The results of the contact assist changed all that. It was something I couldn’t explain with everything I knew. My finger had been caught in the gear chain of a machine and was cut and bleeding. I was in extreme pain. Within 30 seconds the bleeding stopped and the pain was gone. What the hell was that?? It shattered my stable data about life and explaining all things in a material sense.
This staff member asked if I had ever heard of Scientology. I hadn’t so she didn’t have to handle any antagonism or anything. I asked, almost as if I was repeating a patter in a drill, “Where can I find out more about this?”. She directed me to the local org (SFO). I took a personality test, had it evaluated and that was it.
The Div 6 reg tried to sell me the comm course, which was $ 25 at the time. Being fully materialistically oriented, I “knew” that you couldn’t get anything of any value for $ 25. So I said “What else you got?”. The reg told me about HQS. I asked how much and was told $ 100. I was making about $ 125 a week at the time (before taxes) so to me this was significant money. I said “I’ll take it!”.
I started course. The staff member who gave me the touch assist to begin with was the Foundation Div 6 Word Clearer. My first night on course, after a short amount of time studying, she pulled me over for word clearing. This care along with the word clearing tech was amazing.
I continued studying and a day or so later the sup asked me if would be willing to be a pc for another student. I was amazed at my good fortune. I considered it an incredible gift that somehow I was being given by whatever good luck the Gods had granted me. I of course said “YES!!”. (Much later on I realized the student needed a pc that was not in the middle of any other auditing to do his practical on.)
At that time HQS required that you deliver a full battery of objectives to another student. We were running a process that required the pc to alternately touch an object in the room and then a body part, over and over. My student auditor had me touch my arm and then a table, my arm again then the table again. Something “strange” started to happen and I must have had an odd look on my face as the auditor asked “What’s happening?”. I really was puzzled myself as to what was happening. I could only describe it in a way that didn’t even make sense to me at first. I told him, “Well, you see, I touch the table and I know how far away the table is because I know how long my arm is. But the table is somehow much further away. But I know it isn’t because I can reach it with my arm.” I babbled on about this for a moment or two and then I went into shock. “I” was on the ceiling looking down at the table. I had never heard of the concept of exteriorization and as I explained earlier I was completely oriented to MEST explanations for things. It took me a moment to realize that something I could not explain in physical terms was happening. I was exterior. With perception. I then thought back to a time period in my childhood where this had happened but no one knew what I was experiencing and I was scared because everything looked so far away. At that time I ran around the house almost crying, looking at familiar things but that were now not where they should have been relative to where “I” was. My Mother simply calmed me down by whatever means Mothers have for doing these things. It worked and the problem went away. It was that day in that auditing session when I realized what had occurred. I had gone exterior with perception.
Well this was a whole new ball game!
I continued on course and within 2 weeks of my finding out about Scientology, a Sea Org recruiter came to my local org. I spoke with her at length. She explained to me what the Sea Org was and the commitment involved. This didn’t bother me. She explained about being acknowledged and validated for work when it was well done. This was my “go button”. I felt I could be happy sweeping floors as long as I was validated when I did a good job (and I still feel this way to this day).
I signed up and quit my job and drove from San Francisco to LA to join the Sea Org. I will fast forward a bit here. I got married in the Sea Org. My wife and I were not happy with the way things turned out to be (I had been in just under 2 years) and we devised a plan to blow and did so. This may have been due to o/w’s but I also had had some bad experiences with ethics conditions being misapplied and how things were in general. For whatever reason we left.
About 4 years later my wife and I separated and divorced. Up to that time we were paying on our freeloader debts what we could. We didn’t have much money but each week we sent a payment of $ 10 each towards our debts. One day we saw we had made over 100 payments each, still had a long way to go to pay our debts (like another $3000 for myself alone) and then looked at what it would take to pay for the Bridge once we were done with the freeloader bill. We went into overwhelm at the thought and gave up and stopped making payments. Some time after that we separated and divorced for reasons having nothing to do with Scientology).
I was totally disconnected from the Church and making a decent living by then. I was contacted by an FSM who said there was a program being run that reduced an ex-SO members debt based on years of service. This really indicated to me and once again my “go button” of being validated and acknowledged for work well done was pushed. My debt was still about $3000. This program reduced it to about $2000. I immediately went to the New York Org (I was living in Brooklyn at the time), paid my debt in full, took the amnesty that existed at the time (this was around 1980), and then paid for my Bridge up to Clear as well.
We will fast forward again here. I made it to Dianetic Clear, went to ASHO and AOLA to do my OT Preps, Eligibility, OT I-V (doing 3 L’s along the way) and then to Flag for OT VI and VII. Along the way I had miracle wins regarding blowing a full blown case of arthritis (at age 28 this was pretty severe and affected every joint in my body) as well as a very painful infection that had recurred about every 6 months for about 8 years (and for which doctors said there was no lasting cure). So I was definitely getting gains from my auditing.
While I was at Flag I was once again recruited to join the Sea Org at FSO (it was known that I had blown the S.O. before but somehow we got around this). I had other out-quals for FSO staff so had to petition the GO for OK to join staff (this was 1985). This was accepted. I completed OT VI and went home with my materials to start auditing on OT VII while doing my “Project Prepare” to come back to FSO as staff.
When I got home, having been at Flag for about 6 months, I had no money, no job and had to move fast to just be able to survive. I exactly applied the conditions (a subject I had no problem with at that time but which later became a nightmare with the various misapplications that occurred). Within 3 weeks I got a job working for a guy who, last time I had seen him, hated my guts. For some reason he was able to put this aside and hired me. This was a short term contract as a computer programmer which at least paid the bills. This contract was for a possible project that never really got off the ground and lasted only a month.
By that time, my former client that I had before I went to Flag, and who had said that they couldn’t re-hire me when I came back due to budget cuts, etc., contacted me. They were in trouble on a large project and told me to “name my price”. Wow, I thought, this OT VII stuff really works (along with proper application of conditions and the little admin and finance policies I knew and used).
Meanwhile I began waffling about activating my S.O. Contract. I was then making about $ 15,000 a month (in 1985 that was like a King’s ransom), finally decided to re-join the S.O. at FSO and did so in November 1985.
I was FSO staff until I routed out on June 25, 2009.
I have detailed some of my experiences leading up to this to make it clear that I was a winning Scientologist who had gotten many benefits from the application of Scientology to my life.
My first post was as a D of P in the NOTS HGC. As I had been in computers for many years, I had a love for all things technical. I was only a level 0 auditor and really had no strong aspirations to become an auditor. I had NO CLUE what a D of P actually did, but I learned as fast as I could. I made really stupid mistakes in the beginning, but I had a wonderful C/S that was my junior who crammed me beautifully on each thing I did wrong. I learned a lot from those crams…things that to this day still stand me in good stead.
Being technical (computer-wise) yet having no Scientology tech training to speak of and having to run a number of NOTS auditors, interview PC’s, etc. etc. I decided that the only way to really know what was going on and what I should be doing was to read the NOTS pack. That’s right. A Level 0 auditor studying NOTS. As I was on OT VII, access to these materials was not an issue (especially as I was the D of P). I burned the midnight oil, studying late at night and during meal breaks. I found the material fascinating. It also made me better able to understand difficulties my auditors might be having and also to interview my PC’s better (I had an interviewer who worked under me, but I did the more searching, “case cracking” type interviews myself).
All sounds great right? So where did things go wrong? There were many incidents along the way and I will recount them as I recall them, not necessarily in the order in which they happened.
I took pride in my post. My stats were not always the best, but I did everything possible to make my PC’s win and to handle things when they weren’t. One of my auditors commented to me once that I was the best “interview D of P” he had ever seen. Not everyone agreed with my approach to the post. I felt, as D of P, my main function, as LRH laid out, was to be a “traffic cop”. To me that meant doing anything to keep the results going the way they should. Understanding my auditors and keeping them winning. Taking care of my PC’s and handling them well. Some of my seniors, looking at my stats of Well Done auditing hours, felt I should be tougher on my auditors. I was supposed to yell at them, run them hard, etc. I really couldn’t bring myself to do that on a regular basis, although I did fall prey to that more than I care to remember. I am not proud of that part of my history.
To illustrate the divergent views I held relative to my seniors about how to do my post, I will relate one incident. This was in the late 80’s or maybe even 1990. I had found an old pack of hand typed transcripts of talks given by LRH. One I vividly recall was titled “LRH Talk to SNR C/S 1970”. Here, among other things, LRH described a hat of the D of P in interviewing PC’s to get to the bottom of any difficulties they were having in their auditing. It required use of the meter, following up on reads and pulling strings so the C/S could unravel where things had gone wrong. I loved this lecture. One day, I had a PC who was in major case trouble. I went over with the C/S what they wanted to know, was given a set of questions from the C/S and the latitude to use the references I knew to get the product. It was a long interview. About 2 hours if memory serves me. By the end of the interview the PC was very relieved and I felt I had gotten the product the C/S wanted. The interview’s purpose was not to crack the case, but to find out what no one could figure out as to what was going on with the case. I got that product, as later confirmed by the C/S and how well their auditing went after that.
When I came out of the interview, a senior org exec was waiting for me, fuming that I had been in an interview that long. She called it “squirrel” and was incensed that I had left the HGC “unmanned” for so long a time. She demanded to know what reference I was applying. In fact, she was really saying there was no reference and that I was a “squirrel”. When I tried to give her the exact reference that was from LRH that covered what I did, she wouldn’t hear of it and ripped my face off.
This, along with other incidents, was what caused me to feel I didn’t belong there any longer.
Then there was the time, in about 1991 I think, when the org was under heavy ethics. It was announced that each day at lunch muster an individual would be sent to the RPF. This was insane and reminiscent of some kind of NAZI purge. Each day we would go to muster, knowing someone, anyone, it could even be you, would find out they were being sent to the RPF. This was for anything that ran the gamut of the ethics book codes from errors, on up. After seeing the kinds of insignificant reasons that a person was sent, each person then went into terror knowing any mistake they made could be a reason for being sent to the RPF. And you wouldn’t know about it or have a clue until it was announced to the whole crew at muster that day. The person was then carted off by security then and there to the RPF. You can imagine what the atmosphere was like.
Even with all this evidence that things were not as they should be in a Scientology org, I, as did most other staff members, just buckled down and resolved to do their jobs so perfectly that they could not be the subject of such handling.
In 1993, while I was still a D of P, we had just moved into a newly renovated space in the Sand Castle. I was told I was getting a new auditor, who was formerly staff at Int, and that I had “better have a line up for him” (of pc’s to audit). In those days the most unconscionable overt a D of P could commit was to have an idle auditor who didn’t have a PC. PC volume was a bit light at the time so I couldn’t take any existing pc’s from any other auditor’s line up. I was committed to the fact that I would solve this problem so that everyone would be happy with me. As I was told this in the morning, with the implications that the auditor could arrive any minute, I began assigning new pc’s as they arrived to his line up. I had gotten I think 3 real pc’s arrived, through their interviews, folders programmed and ready to go. Still the auditor had not shown up. At this time there was also a new rule that any pc who did not go in session that day, FOR ANY REASON, had to be reported to DM who was there at the base with a whole INT mission.
As the day wore on and the auditor did not show up (I had no control over this as he was a “gift” from DM to FSO), the PC’s I had assigned started complaining about not having gone in session. With the rule that all pc’s had to go in session or else, I began to get worried.
Finally Marc Ingber, who I believe was CO CMO INT at that time was in my HGC and was asking for the number of PC’s who had not gone in session. I was a bit self-destructive at this point, and rather than not include some pc’s in the count that maybe I could have validly excluded, I counted every pc who had not gone in session, and I mean EVERY PC. I think the number was something like 22. Even 1 PC would have been cause for a dressing down, but 22?? So, of course he looked at the scheduling board and saw that I had a line up for this new auditor with 3 pc’s on his line up, none of whom had gone in session. He ripped my face off for assigning pc’s to this auditor when he “hasn’t even routed onto lines as FSO staff” (a new concept I had never heard of in my almost 8 years at FSO) and wasn’t even my staff yet. In my feeble defense I said something like “It wasn’t my intention to keep those pc’s from going in session”. His response was “I’m not here to discuss your case!!!” (I guess this was alluding to some kind of FPRD tech to do with intentions, not what I was at all trying to communicate). This little interaction only served to push the wedge in deeper to separate my views from those of my seniors and INT management. Damned if you do and damned if you don’t was a phrase that came to mind.
Then there was the time when Big League Sales’s (a book recommended by LRH for reg training and was on all Pro Reg Course checksheets) use of how to handle “bird dogs” got me in trouble.
A “bird dog” is anyone who gives a sales person a lead on a prospect who later buys something. It was a tool, according to BLS, that was vital to a sales person’s production. It even spelled out that they were to be given monetary rewards whenever someone they “bird dogged” to a sales person (reg) paid for something.
This was a system that was “in” at FSO and sanctioned all up and down the line. The reges each week would keep track of these “bird dogs”, a specific percentage was used for the commission amount they were paid, a PO was submitted with the specifics of the cycles involved and the money was paid to the reg who then presented it to the “bird dog”. All above board and represented for exactly what it was. As a D of P, my pc’s needed to re-sign. It was something that was survival for my HGC as I then had more pc’s to audit and the auditor’s were not then idle as a result. I got very good at this. I didn’t do it for the commissions, nor did I even keep track or expect it. It was kind of forced on me by the reges. I admit I didn’t object to it and enjoyed the bit of extra money it gave me. I am merely trying to state that I did not instigate it nor did I even go after it. It was just the system that was used.
One day, an admin person from the reg office came to ask me, regarding a list of pc’s who paid the prior week, which ones I was responsible for so they could calculate the commissions. When the person was in the HGC, Bitty Miscavige (not sure of her post at the time, but somewhere high up in CMO INT) was there also and she asked her what she was doing there. She explained very matter-of-factly why she was there. Bitty turned to me and said in a VERY angry tone of voice “If I get one more report about you I will personally route you to the RPF!!!!” Up to that time I was not in any ethics trouble so this was a bit of a “skipped gradient” regarding ethics. I was terrified at the time.
At this time there was also a heavy ethics atmosphere at the base (again this was around ’91 – ’93 time period) and each night the entire crew went to a briefing where COB detailed the items that were discovered that day about out-ethics on the base. That night the subject was me. I was named as if I was doing something illegal, out-ethics and off-policy and as if it was something I was hiding that had now been exposed. It was made into such a crime that the gasps from the rest of the crew were loudly audible at the mention of the heinous out-ethics I was involved in. It was as if I was the only person doing this and as if it was all very hush-hush and a secret (all reges did this with other staff and especially D of P’s). At the end DM gave an “amnesty” to cover anyone else who might have been involved in this. This was the end of the “bird dog system”, a system prominently displayed in BLS, the book LRH chose to make the “bible” on how to successfully reg (ref LRH ED 236 INT where he specifies that the why for low GI was the lack of use of the tech in this book).
The next day, DM came to my HGC. He purposely bumped into me, in a “playful” but meaning sort of way, and said “It’s not good to have withholds from me.” In my feeble effort to defend myself I said “Sir, it wasn’t a withhold and was known about by everybody.” His response was “I (emphasized) didn’t know about it!”. That ended any attempt I might make to clear up my name on that score.
Around November 1993 I was told by HCO that a new reg was needed in Dept 6 and that I had been chosen. My previous meager experience as a reg consisted of a failed Flag World Tour stint in 1987 which ended with me doing mest work on the decks just to destimulate from it (while I make no excuses for my failure on this post, there were many reasons for it and all of them could be covered under off-policy and out-tech situations that existed with regard to the tour at the time).
Understandably, because of my last experience as a reg, I wanted no part of this posting. In the end I finally acquiesced and moved to that post. Surprisingly, to me anyway, I did quite well as a reg and at one point during the time from 1993 to 2009 when I routed out, I was even the number 2 reg for the year.
Life as a reg was the best and the worst depending on how the stats were. To his credit, when Harvey Jacques took over as Dir Reg (previously working doing big book deals for Bridge), he did a lot to establish the area. He had very little help but built his own area according to many basic policies (hatting, esto ing, cramming, videoing reges to improve their “reg tech”, etc). He took the department to heights it had never seen before. Many of those years were very pleasant. When the GI was great we were treated like Kings, but when it was down we were treated just as severely the opposite.
Rather than detail all the outpoints one could look at over those years I will fast forward a bit.
I’m not sure what year it actually started, but at one point Int events became a very big deal. They were, however, engramic for the reges. Up until that time I actually enjoyed going to events as a staff member. They were uptone and a time for reviewing all our accomplishments in recent months.
When the change occurred, it could all be summed up under the subject of “quotas”. There was always something to sell, some new release and the quotas given were astronomical to say the least. The usual “no one secures until all quotas are met” became the order of the day. We tried various ways to handle this so it was livable, and one time we even succeeded in making our quota BEFORE the event (always a dream, but realized in actuality almost never). That was a joy, to be able to just watch the event and enjoy the after event festivities knowing all our quotas were met.
The bulk of the time was like “Night of the Living Dead”. Many times, if you were behind quota, you were told to work through the event, selling on the phone to people in other time zones and that you would “see the event later” (which often didn’t happen). In any event, the after event evolutions became more and more gruesome. We would see the people after the event and try to make the quota. When that failed, around midnight or so, we would then get on the phones and call the west coast where it was 3 hours earlier, then Australia, Europe, etc. This went on until we made the quota (which almost never happened as the quotas themselves were unrealistic) or until someone figured out a way to present what we had done as a “highest ever event release” and would get us OK to go home. Usually about 3 am.
Now you would think that would be enough to make a horror movie out of. But there was more. As I mentioned earlier, our only hope to get home at some decent hour was to do “pre-event sales” like starting a day before the event. You had to be very careful as the release was supposed to be a secret until it was announced. Often we would sell the release without telling the public what it was, only that “You will definitely want it!!”. One time an Int exec came to us the afternoon of the event day and said “You are of course not selling any of the release until after the event, right?” with the implication that doing that would be out-ethics. Hell, what other way could we even hope to make anything like the quotas that were set!! So now we were on a “withhold” from Int execs as to what we were doing. It was like some sadistic game where you had your hands tied, tape over your mouth, and you were expected to produce. Like there was absolutely NO reality (like an arcx assessment) about what it took to do these release evolutions.
Well as bad as that was, by the end of the week that the event occurred in, things got back to normal and we could just do our posts again (until the next event).
This all changed when the Basics were released. For me this was the beginning of the end that led to me routing out. The Basics release was the “release event that never ended”. The intensity of this release was about 100 times that of a normal release….and it just kept going. In fact it continued until the day I left (and is probably still going on).
I was a bit of a “black sheep” on this evolution, and this actually got to be well known. The pressure to sell was beyond anything I had seen in my more than 2 decades at the FSO. The quota’s themselves fostered criminality since a staff member HAD to make their quota OR ELSE. So they did anything and everything needed in order to “report” that they had made a sale. Some of the illegal things that occurred during this period were:
Debitting money for books from account without authorization
Repackaging started packages of intensives to make money available for books (a practice that up until this time was considered a gross financial irregularity if a reg ever did this).
“Finding” unused hours in PC folders that could be re recreditted to the account and would be IF they donated a portion toward Basics (this ended up being the scam of all scams which put back on account money that didn’t exist at all and actually cost the org hundreds of thousands of dollars as they were debiting money that wasn’t there for books that then had to be paid to the book account from current income. Shooting themselves in the foot comes to mind as a phrase).
Scams like promising the person that if they buy the many Basics packages being demanded that “someone else will sell them for you and put the money back on your account” (in the instances I got to know about on this, every one of those was an outright lie).
Arranging for one person to loan another person the money for buying several Basics packages just to “bridge” the money until that person got their money and paid them back.
This is a practice forbidden by policy, I believe HCO PL “Handling of Refunds and Bounced Checks” Finance series 3-1R, I think. Any reg caught doing this in the past was crucified literally for doing so. I witnessed this being done openly by non-reg personnel (as all staff were regging for the Basics now, almost full time). The worst one I remember was when an MAA got another new FSO staff member who had money to loan someone they didn’t know, something like $ 17,000 (maybe it was even more) for Basics, to be repaid by a specified time. That time came and went and no money was forthcoming. This was finally resolved when a scathing report was written to the RTC MAA and then she did get her money back.
For me there were many aspects to this evolution that disgusted me. It is hard to say what was the worst. Definitely near the top of the list was the “dog eat dog” attitude that staff then had between each other. It was like a constant war going on. Fighting over public to reg for Basics, doing underhanded things (like the D of P asking to see the person for a “D of P Interview” which was actually a Basics reg cycle).
The staff descended on the public almost like a pack of wolves when they arrived at the Base. Many times they took them off the official arrival line onto service and sequestered them in another location until they got the basics they wanted.
The public I regged on a regular basis must have sensed that I was not part of that scene (probably because I was not hounding them constantly for Basics but just did my post) and they sometimes came to me about their mishandlings and I did what could to set things right for them when they did.
At one point due to all these shenanigans, I estimated I was spending between 30 and 50% of my time simply handling accounts that were screwed up due to unauthorized Basics debits. Not to mention trying to reg the public for their service while they were already upset about their account. (Most of the time the account problems weren’t even known about until they were in my office, doing a normal reg interview for services and I would then go to look at the account. That would often be the first time anyone knew there was a problem. Guess how hard that made my job!)
Now, add to all this the major push on IAS, Ideal Orgs, Superpower, etc and boy was my life as a reg becoming miserable. I really managed to stay away from all this stuff (not to say that I didn’t reg for IAS, which I did as I did have a quota on that as well), so when I tried to reg someone for service (the real and only reason regging existed to begin with) I was met with “Gee, I’d love to buy that package but I just donated $ XX,000 to (IAS, Basics, Superpower, Ideal Orgs)”. I also ran into the fact that public who protested making those donations as they had to pay for their Bridge and couldn’t do both were basically told that buying their Bridge was a first dynamic activity and it was implied they were out-ethics to do so. Huh? The whole reason the org was there was to deliver training and processing, so paying for it was out-ethics? Did somebody lose sight of the purpose of Scientology?? This is nuts!! Then no one should ever do the Bridge based on that.
Very early on in this Basics evolution (around say Sept/Oct 2007), my junior, who really hated the long hours, started doing (unbeknownst to anyone) off-policy things to “make the quota” so we could go home on time. Well, I have to admit, at first I was very happy about this as I could just do my post while she handled the Basics quotas.
I then noticed some outpoints in some of the things she was doing and tried bringing this up to my seniors. They “looked into it” and said they all looked fine. At this point I only noted some minor things that looked a bit off, I still had no idea of the kind of things they later discovered.
It was discovered that she, in collusion with Treasury, had agreed to repackage a public’s intensives and debit Basics from them. When the public later came to Flag and discovered this, she was livid. The account did get fixed, but upon investigation it was found my junior had done this type of thing to the tune of about $80,000. She was, correctly in my opinion, sent to the RPF.
Due to the fact that I now had no junior, I was given an OK to not have a Basics quota as I couldn’t do all of my normal post production plus a Basics quota without even having an assistant (all other reges had an assistant and some had 2 as this was found to increase the income tremendously by this simple little action of having an assistant).
So, I continued to do my post. Other staff started to notice that I “didn’t do Basics” and I began to be ostracized a bit. Many staff on key posts were too busy making their Basics quota to do their own normal post. This included posts like D of P, MAA, Cashier. This made my job harder as trying to re-sign HGC pc’s, which was something a Dept 6 reg does as his primary income source, became very difficult as the D of P was not available because he was in a “Basics interview” (for sometimes hours at a time) or “Basics are flapping” so he couldn’t talk, etc. Pretty crazy that the normal org functions suffered as a result of this evolution.
In addition, as I didn’t have mutual out ruds with other staff and their illegal and criminal handling of Basics (not all staff were this way, but those doing a high volume of Basics sales were quite often involved in financial irregularites), I became a whistle blower of sorts and therefore very unpopular.
The area I became most unpopular in was the MAA office. I uncovered and wrote reports on all the financial irregularities that came across my plate. Realize also that I wasn’t going around looking for this stuff, this was just what I tripped over in doing my normal post. It included the already mentioned debiting of accounts without authorization, repackaging intensive/training packages to use money for books, taking and invoicing checks that were KNOWN to not be covered by funds (mostly written under duress to do so even though they didn’t have the money), threatening off-policy ethics actions if they didn’t donate and some stuff that defied my imagination like having a person from Italy write a “counter check” on a Bank of America account in Euro currency with no account number!!
I even received a veiled threat from a senior MAA when I wrote a KR on one of his juniors. I felt like I was an FBI plant in a mafia operation and I was about to have my cover blown. It was pretty scary actually.
Just for the record, so you don’t hear about it elsewhere, early on during this evolution, in November 2007, I did something really stupid. I blew. Where did I go? Crazy, but I went to Las Vegas. Why? Also crazy. I had some money and thought maybe I could run it up into a more sizeable amount at the tables. Yes it was nuts. I admit that. I was nuts by then in a sense. I don’t even recall the specific incident that set me off to do that. How I left the base without being seen was another trick. In the midst of this insane act, I also felt bad about leaving my post in the middle of a week. Being on GI lines, you “confirm” money once the public agrees to pay even if the logistics take another day or 2. So, since I blew on Saturday morning, I had money confirmed that needed to be gotten in. I also had reg cycles in progress that should be followed up on. So, while on the plane, I wrote all this up in great detail. If I recall it was something like 9 pages of details. When I got to Las Vegas and found a hotel, I asked them to fax it to Flag at midnight their time and asked for the fax to not show the number it had come from.
Well I guess they didn’t or couldn’t do that and that is how they found me. The next morning I got up very early and went out. When I got back mid morning, 2 FSO staff were waiting for me at the hotel. They were doing the “blow drill”. They also made it clear to me that they don’t do this for everybody and implied I should be honored that they were sent to get me. I got that the order came from RTC. After many hours of talking I agreed to return to “route out properly” and was told it would take about a week.
It was 19 months later when I finished my routing form and got final OK to go. During that time I did something else very strange. Usually, when someone is on a “Leaving Staff Routing Form” they do MEST work while getting their sec check, ethics handlings, etc. My senior at the time asked me to stay on post until they could get a replacement for me. At the time I was regging $ 200,000 (on a bad week) to $ 300,000 or even $ 350,000 on a good week, so this was a loss of income no one wanted to have to deal with. I had no problem with this as I actually liked my post and felt I helped my public in many ways other reges couldn’t or didn’t due to my background and experience as a D of P. It was a bit odd though, as only a few staff knew my real situation, so I was on a withhold from other staff as to my current scene.
So, I worked as a reg while doing my leaving sec check, the attempt to do the TRD on me (which failed miserably as they wanted me to run as enemy lines those things I had written in KR’s and when I pointed that out they dropped it) and other actions which went nowhere. My original auditor, I found out much later, was going through his own ethics situation at the time, so even though we had gotten onto the end ruds, we ended up doing a whole other sec check since his auditing was suspect.
There finally was a replacement gotten for me but it took some time before he got up to any decent level of production. As well, I took this time period to do several hat write-ups that were specific to how the lines on that post ran at the Flag AO where I worked. Finally, when I completed all that, I told my MAA that at the end of the following week I would no longer be on post but would do MEST work only. At the end of that week I routed myself to security and began doing MEST work at the Hacienda.
I actually look back on that period as a pleasant experience. The MEST work itself was therapeutic, but I also didn’t have the insanity of the quotas, pressure, yelling and screaming that I had as a daily regimen while on post as a reg. I voluntarily worked harder than any security guard could have ordered me to and I got to be well liked at the Hacienda as I did all the exterior cleaning of the entire property (scrubbing, sweeping, carting debris, etc) as well as many of the interior common spaces (fitness center, crew lounges, canteen, etc). I even amazed the security guards by cleaning areas that had not been cleaned in years and did it so well some of them thought I had repainted these areas!!
Well, I got through all my sec checking and ethics handling and finally got the OK to go and routed out via security.
As a comment, my MAA kept trying to get me to do my conditions or at least start on them. I had a BIG problem with that. First, I didn’t think I needed to do them. I had made 100’s of millions of dollars (not an exaggeration) for the FSO as a reg from Nov 1993 to about April 2009. Why would I need to do conditions? How many other people on the planet could say that? A few. Strange but that was how I felt. The second reason that I told the MAA was, how could I come out of Treason without deciding to stay? Didn’t make sense that I could come out of “Treason” and still be leaving. My thought process sort of locked up on that one.
In any case I finally did route out.
I am rebuilding my life now and it is going very well. I felt PTS to the FSO before I decided to leave and now I feel freer than I have in 25 years. I had earlier been in computers before joining the S.O. in 1985. I tried other things, made a bit of money but nothing really viable. I then decided to take a stab at getting back into that industry. Well, in the past 25 years in computers, EVERYTHING changed. The internet was a fledgling idea back in 1985 and not widely used. Today it IS how computer networking is done. Well, I was self taught to begin with in 1970 when I started, so I figured I could do it again. In March of this year I started studying in earnest. I then got a small job and then another etc. Now I am making a decent living and I am well respected by my clients. In fact I use an LRH datum having to do with the re-sign line in the HGC to measure my quality of delivery. LRH basically says if a PC refuses to re-sign there is out-tech on the case and it is Qual’s job to discover what it is and correct it. There is even a whole line devoted to just this one fact.
Well in what I am doing now I feel this applies. If I don’t get repeat business from my clients then I consider that I have failed to give them a quality product that they are happy with. So far I’m batting a thousand as all of my clients have re-signed for more and/or have originated glowing referrals to friends of theirs which resulted in more work for me. I accomplish this by applying another simple datum from LRH from HCO PL “Conditions of Exchange”. I apply “exchange in abundance” in all my dealings with my clients and that is something they have never seen before and it is received very well.
I am happy to be counted as an Independent Scientologist and consider I am in the ranks of many I respect, including, but not limited to, Marty and Mike.
I also want to thank Marty for his help in bringing me to this point. I had concerns and he took the time to really help me through them so I could openly announce where I stand.
I made a couple of posts earlier under the name “John Gault” as that was a character of author Ayn Rand that symbolized to me the kind of person who does not tolerate suppression of any kind.
I’m glad to be out in the open and possibly some of you know me. Now we can openly be in touch.
OMG Hy!!!! Please contact me, Marty will give you my address!!! I send you xoxoxxxoxoxo!!!!
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Hy Levy….one of the nicest people I worked with at the FSO and loved by the public he dealt with.
I am so happy to know that you are free of the insanity and being successful in your new life. Welcome!!
It would be good to talk with you…please email me: email@example.com
ML, Eileen (Haworth) Clark
oops, sorry, gave the wrong email address:
correct is: firstname.lastname@example.org
Welcome Hy! I am totally proud to have you in the Independents’ field! Wow, I loved your story, every bit of it. I’ve been a DofP and seems like you were an awesome one. I’ve been a registrar…you were awesome at that too! I totally self-trained to do my work via computer/internet to create the ideal job for myself.
You obviously can do whatever in the hell you want to and do it well. 🙂
I am so happy to meet you and I hope we meet one day.
Meet you one day in person. 🙂
Hy…. Welcome!! So glad to see you here. You are about to discover a whole new world of REAL Scientology. Independent Scientology is like the good old days — genuine people who are interested in more than your bank account.
OMG! This is quite a shock! This is HUGE!!!! You look awesome! Glad you are doing well & enjoying your freedom!
Now I know what they mean when you ask where is “so and so” & the answer is: “he is on a medical handling”. That’s what I was told when I asked about Steve Kemper & that’s what I was told when I ask about you
;-). Now you’re both out of the SO. Hope Steve follows your footsteps & shows his smily face here soon too 🙂
Sending you big hugs from Seattle, Marie-Joe DePhillips 🙂
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This is Tony DePhillips.
I always liked you and now I know why. I am so proud to count you as a friend. I hardly know what to say…
Hy was my Dof P and Reg while I was on Solo Nots. He was the BEST..
We had a a couple petty ARCX’s but I never knew the shit you were confronting. I am so happy for you Hy!!!
Now THIS is going to cause some fur to fly for sure!!
Did your wife leave too? Something tells me she didn’t but I could be wrong.
I would love to have a get together with you someday soon and do our own little debrief. 🙂
Wow!! You made my night Hy and you too Marty.. Man Marty you have a high confront of randomity my man!!!
Now I know who John Gault is!! 🙂
Oh, I wanted to add that I totally agree that for all the $$$$$$$$$$$ you made Flag you’re a super VIP!!!! It’s like they think that the Pimp that beats & abuses his best whore should assign her a condition of treason when she says “NO MORE”!!! ROTFLMAO
Sorry for the analogy, I hope you don’t take offense. I obviously don’t think you’re a whore but this is totally absurd.
You and I know one another way back.You are welsome to connect. Fit the puzzles together.
Your post was one of the best I have ever seen in these times.
Hy – Willkommen to the wild and fun world of the Independent Scientologist. Your wins are our wins. You will find us a pan determined group of very independent beings. Glad to have you along with us on the journey.
You were always one of my favorite staff members at FSO. Welcome to the sunny side!
We know exactly what you mean about the unlawful debiting of Flag accounts for the Basics and the repackaging of intensives to create “nonexistent” money to use for Basics packages. It happened to us to a shocking extent. We asked how that could possibly be okay but Paul Miller said it was completely approved from above. I assume he’s elsewhere by now.
OMG!!!! Thank you for being as always an incredible leader and coming out as an Independant. I am sooooo happy that you are doing well. I appreciate that you tell of your wins. Many people speak of the negatives that they experieced in the Church and not so many speak of the wins. I really loved receiving a D of P from you. I did not realize until a year ago, what suppression you were under at FSO. If I would have known, I would have complained a little less when I had to pay up.
Thank you for caring for all of us public and your many years of service.
PS You will be surprised on who is reading this and whom is out but under the radar. Please contact me through Marty.
Welcome to the Indi Field. And thank you for your stories. I always liked you when I came to Flag.
Welcome, Hy. Just one small point of briefing here in the Independent Church of Scientology, there is a lot of stuff that goes on and services that are delivered but very little money is involved. This may take a bit of time to get used to but the gains are much better this way, as I am sure you will find out.
I remember you from 1996 when I was down there on the Solo NOTs evolution. Thanks for the very even-handed relating of your story and all the best in this next chapter of your life.
Hy Levy??? I nearly fainted when I saw your name! Oh…so fun to re-connect with old friends. You were my D of P at Flag in the 90’s…what a nightmare.
I don’t need to set the stage—you were there! Congratulations!!! Welcome and thanks for coming out from “under the radar”. It helps SO many people when you do that. 🙂 If you want to chat—give me a call, or e-mail me at
email@example.com (was Tory Bezazian when you knew me. Now X-Husband still “in”, re-married. Sad, but true).
Happy Holidays to you, and ALL 🙂
Burbank, CA (818) 588-3044
After that many years in the Sea Org what does one do with one’s self?
Especially after being the Director of Processing in the NOT’s Hubbard Guidance Center.
I don’t want to give away too much details about myself, it is best to keep OSA guessing, and they are, but when I first arrived to the NOT’s HGC at Flag there was a sign hanging over the door, electric sign, that said “The Incredible NOT’s HGC”. I went out to the beach and I heard some guy sitting next to me in the sun laughing, he was laughing “The Incredible NOT’s HGC”. It was very funny. The HGC was located all the way at the end of the walk past all the cabanas under the balcony outside the West Auditorium.
You seem like an amazing person. Life is sometimes more case blowing than even “The Incredible NOT’s HGC”.
Your story is yet one more tale of the massive betrayal of the church on its public and its staff. Beautifully told, it made me sad that you were not validated for everything you did. Please accept my most sincere validation for the years of life and devotion you gave them. But especially, accept my validation for being strong and bright enough to not tolerate the insanity, out-tech and out-ethics any longer.
You are going to make lots of new friends here. Please count me among them.
Welcome Hy! Great to see you on this side of the fence.
Welcome out! I never met you, but I’m sure I know many people who have. 🙂
WOW!!! This is great to have You with us Independents. You should remember me from the time I’ve worked at FSO. Big hug, Ignazio Tidu.
I remember you from your DofP time, Hy. I was one of those pre-OTs who had a will of his own. 🙂 I remember your laughter. Good memories for me.
What a pleasure to see you here and read your story. Fantastic. I wish you all the best!
Wow!! Hy!!!! I am blown away now and Christmas is complete.
Hy aka John Gault (always good to know who is behind an Internet name – mine will come in due course too 🙂 – though we’ve never met I believe it was you my CO talked about in another Cont to the entire crew (so, I “know” you of sorts).
Your story reads like the story of a decent guy who tried to be a decent guy in a madhouse to which, I believe, many of us can relate too only too well. Every one of these stories expose more and more facets of a church gone mad, destroying itself from within and by “command intention”.
Congratulations and I tip my hat to you.
Question: is it true that SO staff are given a “Second Statistic” (in addition to their post statistic) that has to do with “Reg Quotas” (Basics). Heard about it but don’t know whether this is a general practice.
Also, would you care to publish your e-mail address (most preferably, in my case, a hushmail account).
Sorry Marty, this comment should NOT be a reply to Mary Jo’s but a separate entry. Please make it a separate comment if you can.
Hy, I was smiling up to my ears today when I saw this post…
you know me very well.
I’m so happy you are out and free, I guess you left shortly after my last squirrel cycle at Flag…
Very well done. Out here we have Scientology and we are free!!
lots of love.
Feel free to contact me at any time!!
I read it to the part of selling the basics. Need to read later the rest of your story. Have to work now, but want to comment on selling the basic. By the way very interesting story you tell.
It had been a big mistake to let all staff sell the basics. Up until that action I never got a call from any staff or reg. After I went out mid 90ies. Not from my home org and not from any FSO reg or whomever. Then got a call every day. From staff I knew, from UK from Int. First I had been a bit pissed about these many calls but then I did see a chance to get in comm with the caller. I used it to audit them a bit over the phone. Or if a nasty caller I put some nasty stuff back. I think all that had a little effect in the minds of the caller. And if it had as the final result that a staff or SO member started to think over his situation I had won. Consider how many SO members have a chance to talk to “normal” people like me?
And they had to call every day.
I think back now and feel that this did have an effect some of the callers.
Congratulations on your stand for freedom & personal integrity- very inspiring. As my reg at the FSO over the years, you were always an Island of Sanity in what was supposed to be the “Friendliest Place in the Whole” World, but, sadly, had become just the reverse, due to the Cabbage regime’s influence, especially in later years.
You always granted me incredible beingness during our interviews, despite the palpable air of terror in the Sandcastle corridors outside your office. Yes, you regged me for many thousands of dollars, but I could tell you genuinely cared about me as an individual, and never pushed beyond reason, as so often happens in the C of M today.
Your courage has inspired me to make this, my first post, although I’ve been reading this blog for months, as a “secret apostate”. I know its the first step for me to fully announce as you have, when I feel I can.
Your announcement is very meaningful to me, as you are so widely known in the world of Scientology, it could have seemed easier or wiser to remain underground, but you have gone ahead and done it!
I’m certain that your action will encourage many others like myself -who know you for the warm and competent being that you are- to do the same.
Geez! I just went exterior! The starshine is rather nice above the clouds, tonight! This communicatin’s stuff’s rather powerful!
And let me add my love & thanks to Marty, Mike and all the others of you who make this blog so wonderfully alive.
Thank you Hy Levy!!! I red your story through tears in my eyes!!! It is so great to see you out, free and happy.
I’m reading Martys blog (thanks a lot Marty) since Mai this year!
My be you remember me, my be not – I crossed your way in 1995/1996 as AssistantBridgeConsultant at FH! The times when everything was ok and the Division Two FSO got highly commended as LRH Birthday Game Winners!!! I ever was very proud I was – for a short time – part of the best team on this planet. This times are gone inside the “church”. Enjoy your new live as Independent Hy you deserve to be treated like a King ever!!!
To me, the D of P is one of the most important persons in the HGC.
You are one of them.
Welcome and keep doing quality work outside the Sea Org.
Leaving the SO is a big step, but going public will free you in ways that are completely unexpected. Your comm lines will open up again and your willingness to create will expand tenfold.
Very well done on retraining yourself on technological matters.
You have a lot to contribute to the world of independent Scientology. If there is anything I can do to assist you, please let me know.
David St Lawrence
There was always an element of care and humanity to you and the way you did your job. I am glad to see you out, unshackled, and breathing fresh air.
Wow and more wow!! I haven’t yet read your story, Hy – but just had to say
hello and welcome. If you need anything, please contact me. Marty will give you my hushmail.com email.
You are/were indeed loved by the public in the FSO – I remember you so well. Always upbeat even under outrageous regging pressure.
Welcome to the wonderful world of freedom!
One quick question … how is Cheryl Licardi (can’t remember her current married name, was married to IAS reg Burt). She was my auditor and friend. I know she was ill back in 1993 but have no news since then.
Back to your story. It’s going to be fascinating and certainly sad.
OK – John Gault/Hy I’ve read your fascinating story!!
And I plum forgot — you were indeed the DofP at the Sandcastle. I was on OTVII at the time and you were in the NOTS HGC, so we didn’t really cross paths too much. I do remember you always were reading – while not on post – walking to the Sandcastle or after staff musters.
So glad that you are doing well and are rebuilding your life. Great!!
Well, I called Carol at 6:20 this morning and asked, “You awake?” No. I said “Well, you are now. Guess who’s front & center on the blog”. HY LEVY!! And we laughed with delight.
Just a couple days ago we’d been wondering where you were and hoping you were out.
Hy, welcome & congratulations. It’s great to see you out, looking good and doing well. Wonderful.
OMG Hi Levy, wow good on you. Well Well Done. I wondered about you and I am really happy for you. I do remember fun times with you on tour and on the base. You look great. I would love to talk with you. WELCOME!
Thanks for your debrief. It rehabbed a few things with me about how highly valued HELP and CARING were in the days of yore. And how we all could endure most anything to exercise those higher purposes to assist our fellow Men (and Women). These ‘x’ factors are sorely missing from the current line-up of offerings from The Church of Reverse Processing, so I am glad to see you out and doing well. Take care, and I hope to see more of you around these parts in the future.
A VERY BIG WELCOME TO YOU HY!!!
Thank you for stepping out and sharing your story. It takes COURAGE!!! VWD!!!!
I went back to read some of the comments I’d missed and had a thought. I wonder if it’s finally dawned on DM that Scn is reforming and continuing, on the outside…………without him. The dwarf isn’t needed or wanted. Hy, I suspect your coming out has put a stake right through his blackened heart.
Hy, Hello from me and my wife, Donna Shannon! We were FSO staff briefly in 2005, and Donna was a DofP in the Solo NOTs area under Linda Thames. I was in the TTC, training up to Cl. IX, and we saw the stuff that was going on at the time and said “no, thanks” and quickly routed out. They said we blew, declared us, expelled us, and disconnected us. OKAY! Just trash two Patrons with honors, OT8 and 7, and turn them into enemies; great idea! Your story was very interesting to me. One event I recall ,related to ‘events’, working past the time when all public had gone home because the quota had not been met. Going into the Lemon Tree for a quick break, getting cold water, a few crackers, and cheese if you were quick, then being told not to sit down, going back out past tables laden with fine foods, fruit, pastries, cold cuts piled high for the public, and thinking ” hmm, so this is how staff are treated!” The staff meetings were also very instructive. Watching Mike Rock and other auditors I knew stood up and belittled in front of 700 staff, and assigned to the “It’s got nothing to do with me club”, was a bit too close to Chinese Communist group justice tactics for my taste. I am glad to hear you are out and doing well. Thank you for your write up of what was going on at FSO. Mike Henderson St. Petersburg, Fl.
My normal greeting, as we were passing at the SC. I always wondered why you looked so distracted, now I know, TY. I sent a friend request at FB which went ignored now I get why, TY! Your announcement will go far-wide and fast to FSO’s public and local field, many, many of us are in good standing, but not in agreement with the current or “recent” scene. So we walk away quietly, being unwilling to have dissconnection orders from family and friends issued. I knew you as a public and as my best reg. Your care factor for the public in front of you was outstanding! I almost fell over when you asked me if I could afford to put so much $$$$$ on such a variety of charge cards, for Rev. auditing. I felt safe and secure doing it, not being fully aware of future consequences. I could see your doubt and reservations, over our outside smoke and coffee 2w/c cycle. It was tough, but I recently paid off all of all those open accts. And I thank You for being You.
Welcome Hy! We embrace you as you embrace freedom … Hallelujah!!
I always loved saying that to you at the Sandcastle when you were reg and at the Fort when you were the D of P. You were the best D of P I ever had because it was obvious that you cared. You were the best reg I ever had because you never tried to hassle, con, trick, pressure, lie or bully me. Just a straight arrow, man.
OK, let’s see how good your memory is. I won’t put too much pressure on you to come up with who I am ’cause I know you’ve had a million public on your lines at Flag over the decades, but you just might remember this one.
You were D of P when I had just finished OT V, all three L’s, sec checks, ethics courses, contributions and all the necessary training including the Solo Nots Auditor training in order to qualify to route onto Solo Nots auditing. But they wouldn’t let me on because of some arbitrary decision on the C/S’s or MAA’s part.
For several weeks I literally camped out in a chair, outside the door of the MAA’s office, reading the entire 10 volume Mission Earth Series, bribing the MAA’s with canteen goodies, petitioning uplines to get onto the Level and getting repeatedly turned down. I was told to go home for a year. Duh?
At any rate, I finally wore them out. The day I was approved, I was sitting in Angie’s restaurant having lunch with a friend when you came in, sat down at the counter and said, “Pass on TR-3!” That was such a good ack it sticks with me to this day. Thank you for that fine quality ack.
PS: If you do figure out who I am, don’t blow my cover, I’m having too much fun remaining anonymous for my own personal reasons right now. I’ll drop you a hint in case the warrantee on your memory has expired, the answer is in the handle I use on this blog.
Hi Hy, I was the Solo I/C FSO when you started as the NOTs Director of Processing in the HGC next door. What a great gift to the Independence Movement to have your arrival especially in this time of year. Welcome, welcome, welcome. It’s amazing how many experienced Tech terminals have declared their independence. The friendliest place in the world is now within the hearts of Independent Scientology. I look forward to meeting you again in person ASAP.
What an amazing story.
What an amazing bunch of beings.
What a story. I may have seen you in the 90’s when I did all the new line ups and GAT internship at Flag. I couldn’t figure how you guys put up with those unreasonable targets and kept going at least once a week without sleep. I’m glad you got yourself out of the madhouse and back on your feet. You’re havingness is incredible; you sold more in one hour than I sell in a whole year, amazing! I see you like to play the big game and I’m sure you can track down the selectees that paid you hundreds of millions for what they (and you) thought would benefit all dynamics. You have a huge ability to get people to push towards pro survival goals, you now only have to make them see what is really pro survival. You’re in for a whole new game! Imagine your selectees, after many years of rollercoaster and financial wreckage, finally making stable case gain again. You don’t even have to ask a commission from anyone that gets his money back, they’ll be so happy to regain their abilities, fight back at their SP and finally get what’s promised; they’ll be so happy to progress towards freedom again, it’ll be worth it. I’m so glad Marty took responsibility for you and that you regained your integrity; VVVVWD to both of you! Enjoy your freedom and have a merry Xmas!
Message to DM, grab on to those rods, your gonna need em now!
I don’t think we have met, that I recall, but I read all of your story in its entirety. It was very well written, and I am so glad you wrote it! Thank you for telling us the whole story. It is very sad that the C of S went so badly off the rails, increasingly so, for such a long period of time that it has now become a criminal organization. For this I think we have to thank the dictatorship mentality fostered by one truly psychotic, suppressive person, Mr. David Miscavige. Imagine how different things would have been if, after the departure of LRH, the C of S had been able to proceed in a reasoned, theta, democratic fashion, with freedom of speech and respect for all, following policy, and rationally setting new policy as it appeared to be needed. The groundwork for doing that was there in existing policy.
Humanity, acting a role in great movements, easily falls under the sway of such suppressives when they are backed by apparent theta or the pain-drive of necessity. Here, Miscavige skillfully transitioned from a huge backing of apparent theta (you can be free) into a totality of pain-drive and control by terror (you will be punished and lose your eternity if you don’t do as I say).
It is now a truly destructive act of magnitude to continue to support the official C of S and its related organizations and groups, whether this is done in the good faith believe that that is the right thing to do or not. It is the exact reverse of what LRH worked for over his lifetime.
Independent Scientologists now represent the Hope of Man.
Thanks again for your contributions.
Hi 40-year, it is good to hear from you. I imagine it is not easy coming to terms with issues discussed on this blog, particular after so many years of dedication to your faith. As a non-scientologist I do not fully understand how challenging that must be. I do want to assure you that you will have plenty of support if you decide to leave the CoS. Taking a stand against the human rights abuses (both physical and emotional) by withdrawing your support will give you a renewed sense of purpose, integrity and will be one more step to ending these abuses.
Warm welcome Hy, I really enjoyed your write up, it give insight into the the daily life of SO staff. Thank you for sharing. Well done on helping to expose the truth.
CL: +1. Your perspective here, never having been a member of the C of M, is very valuable. And you are very right about the support, as you have personally demonstrated.
Wow, that was quite a story — and well worth the read! Congrats on holding your integrity during the whole ‘Basics’ regging nightmare. Several things you wrote hit me, but the one that got me in the solar plexus was this:
“I also ran into the fact that public who protested making those donations as they had to pay for their Bridge and couldn’t do both were basically told that buying their Bridge was a first dynamic activity and it was implied they were out-ethics to do so.”
That really does seem to be the current attitude! I was recently talking with a friend who is onlines currently and he said he was ‘unpopular’ at the org because he stopped donating for anything but services — because he’s determined to go up the Bridge. When I mentioned how much of an outpoint that was, he didn’t really see it that way! I told him that it was public paying for services that was supposed to finance Scientology and that these other donations were no where to be found in LRH policy, but he still didn’t agree that it was an outpoint.
By the way, his refusal to pay for anything but services includes no longer loaning staff members money, which I guess he’s being doing regularly, since the staff at the ‘Ideal Saint Hill Size Org’ don’t make nearly enough.
Well Done Hy!
Don’t remember if we worked on any cycles together but I know that you took good care of my people on-lines once there. You always had a good rep with the FSM crowd.
Your ‘coming out’ is HUGE because you are probably one of the most, if not THE most recognizable name to step forward so far that thousands of Public have actually interacted with. The top-of-the-Bridge public.
I know it cannot have been easy to put a bulls eye onto yourself like this and also to overcome what must be a very strong feeling you were betraying your comrades.
These public announcements are powerful tho. So Thank You for your courage and integrity.
Hy Levy!! Wow, Oh Wow! You were both my DofP AND Reg over the years at Flag.
I’d love to personally ack and THANK you for always being that one guy who always seemed to be above the madness as things devolved down the dwindling spiral at Flag. You were the Reg who actually knew when to stop pushing (much appreciated) and you were the DofP who actually LISTENED and CARED. I hope you know that you were widely known and appreciated for your calmness and sanity and high ARC by many public.
Thank you for coming forward. Wow, Oh Wow.
dear levy, Thank you for coming out to tell your story. I’m very glad to here Marty helped and you are now getting grounded out in the world. Your story reminds me of how things went while I was a member (71-98) If all the statt push was eliminated from the orgs, and staff were cared for –sleep, exercise, a bit of time off. We would be doing so much better. Staff would not be in fear, they would not be trying to work tired (which studies have shown makes you mentally “drunk”) And more ARC with each other especially from up lines
to below. I’m glad you have come out from under the radar, I applaud your courage, and thank you for sharing your story.
What an incredible surprise! You were my D of P in the NOTS HGC at Flag! I always felt like you really cared about me; unfortunately, the only one at Flag, on tech lines, that I felt that way about. I have often wondered how you are doing. It is amazing to me that you did so well, for so long, with the conditions that you describe at Flag. It must have been a nightmare. My Flag account was debited without my permission, down to $200, with over $18,000 in illegal debits. I recently got all this straightened out, and received my repayment of $18,500 from the FSO. So, to their credit, they did take the time and the effort to correct it, but I had to sign a waiver and they seemed to be relieved to give me the money. I knew the staff were under tremendous pressure to produce stats for the Basics, and I am sure my account was robbed just so that some poor staff member could go home a few nights and get some sleep. I don’t condone the crimes, but it is unbelievable the pressure and quotas that were put on staff for something that wasn’t even their job. That person is now in the RPF, so is still suffering. I don’t know who it is, but I hope they get out with their sanity, and their health, intact.
But, all that is beside the point. WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME!!!!!!! THE INDEPENDENT SCIENTOLOGY MOVEMENT IS THE MOST INCREDIBLE THING TO HAPPEN!! It is like Scientology was in the early 70’s, when Scientologists actually cared about people and what happens to them. It is about using the tech to better lives, and the money and the bank accounts are an afterthought. Money is secondary; caring about people comes first. The warmth, the humanity, the caring are incomparable. It is the way that Scientology was meant to be. It has the attributes that you demonstrated in all your many years of service, which were given to LRH, and to which I am sure he thanks you. All of us here thank you.
Let us hear from you often! and here’s hoping to see you soon in Texas, doing some chillin’ and grillin’!!!
Catherine Von Ach
Hello Hy! I remember you from FOLO WUS in ’75. I think you were Holly’s communicator. We might’ve even been room mates for a short while. All I can say is that the karmic diversity of each and every person who entered Scientology is as different as the spin of a roulette wheel. Many of us ended up on #33 while others ended up on #23 and some on black, some on red. I think I ended up on the green numbers. Thank you for posting.
Hy, I just wanted to add that I have such reality on the Basics nightmare you spoke of, from a Public view.
I was at Flag, in the middle of a rundown that was going nowhere. After grinding on and on for a few days I got called in for a DofP (not with you, Hy!). I was elated. Finally! Someone was paying attention and I would quit wasting hundreds of dollars per hour.
I walk in and the DofP says “leave the door open.” Then another SO member walks in and closes the door. Turns out, it’s a Reg cycle, two on one. Turns out, I have some hours left over from my last intensive (which are going to be handy for my review cycle I’m thinking). Turns out, that money will buy more books for libraries. Turns out, I’m being amazingly selfish and not looking at the “big picture.” 45 minutes later I’m out of there (somehow), no money donated.
Turns out, that was my last trip to Flag.
Oh, and P.S., I return home to find a third set of Basics arriving on my doorstep. I pull the string and find out that my husband’s auditor decided (unbeknownst to my husband as there was no comm cycle involved) that he “wanted” yet another set, and I guess telepathically, while unconscious, asked for them to be taken off his account.
I wrote a chit, got the money recredited (months later,) and books returned, but it was major dev-t. I can only imagine things are still just as crazy there.
WAO!!!!!!!~ HY I WAS SHOCK BUT IN A GOOD WAY….. WE WORKED IN THE SAME PLACE AO FSO, AND WENT THROUGH SIMILAR THINGS, I’M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU FINALLY GOT THE POINT . YOU LOOK GREAT!!!! AND BELIEVE ME IT WIL GET EVEN BETTER, PTSNES IS A CONDITION I THINK WE ALL HAD WHEN LEAVE SO, BUT OUR KNOWLEDGE AND INTENTION GET US TRHOUGH IT… WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD WHERE SNC IS USED AS LRH INTENDED…. I’M VERY HAPPY TO SAY I KNOW YOU AND I FEELT HONORED TO HAVE YOU AS MY FRIEND……WELCOME A HUNDRED TIMES AND FLORISH AN PROSPER IS WHAT WE DO….
Wow & thanks Hy.
It’s quite the insight you have given as to what it’s really like across the other side of the desk at Flag, I can only imagine it must also be quite the horror of horrors even further down the line these days. So very glad you’ve chosen the way out – welcome & full steam head.
I remember your face from Flag.
Welcome to the Indies! and thank you for speaking out.
“There is a time when silence becomes betrayal” – I recognised this too.
Very well done 😀
A 40-yr~Welcome out! Took me about 10 years to reconnect…and thanks to this blog.
We met once in 1986. I remember the day well. One of the staff members that worked with you was surprised when she discovered I didn’t know who you were. That info was passed around rapidly to other staff who were equally surprised. All of them thought so highly of you and were very proud to be working with you. Your area buzzed with excitement! They insisted we meet and I wasn’t allowed to leave until we did. They all beamed proudly when we said hello. It was a pleasure then and it’s a pleasure now. I’m very happy to know that you’re out of that hell hole.
Hy you are correct when you said:
“Arranging for one person to loan another person the money for buying several Basics packages just to “bridge” the money until that person got their money and paid them back.
This is a practice forbidden by policy, I believe HCO PL “Handling of Refunds and Bounced Checks” Finance series 3-1R, I think. ”
Here is part of an earlier comment on the workable finance system:
“Services are often sold to family groups with one member paying for some or all of them. This is not uncommon and is perfectly legitimate.
“But beyond that, org personnel may not solicit payments from staff or public on behalf of others.
“Occasionally a student or pc in the org offers payment for a friend. That’s fine. But orgs may not solicit or suggest it. Not ever.
“Advance collections are obtained by industrious collection from ‘hot prospects’ and other potential customers.
“The essence of it is selling the service, collecting the money from the customer and getting the service delivered. (Unused prepayments are subject to refund.)”
excerpts from HCO PL 17 FEBRUARY 1971-IRA
REVISED AND REISSUED 27 OCTOBER 1982
HANDLING OF BOUNCED CHECKS AND REFUNDS
IMPORTANT: In this second reference “solicit” is the key word. In this way you have the best of both worlds. Happy public can donate over and above the cost of services to their heart’s content but only on their own determinism, NEVER under duress. And so public aren’t scared away from the org – it’s an island of sanity. They can’t even solicit for your friend’s Bridge, much less for the IAS. Where is non-refundable money mentioned anywhere? Reging is limited to services and materials only and for the 1st and 2nd dynamic ONLY.
-end of excerpt
Anyways, great writeup Hy. Many will benefit because you decided to be an additional terminal out here. You captured how hard it is to do the right thing in that climate of confusion and fear which is the modern SO where the only thing fostered is self doubt. I know for a fact after lots of conversations while at the CLO that the apathy of the crew comes about by knowing the pervasiveness of evil and how there “seems” to be no way to turn it around; it’s not so much un-hattedness.
DM is forcing the SO and staff to ARCx public away from the bridge, resulting in nervous breakdowns and cave-in on post.
The answer is found in HCO PL OT Orgs and my translation in this case would be FIGHT BACK LOUDLY to rouse Scientology from its apathy with persistence and solutions.
We have onlines public and staff out of apathy and up into fear and 1.5. They dimly sense some sort of cavalry is coming. Putting in more order with persistence results in more seeing we aren’t messing around and that we’re the winning side. Thanks Hy!
It’s marvelous to see your name in Marty’s site!!!
Your info on the “Basics scene” fills in some sordid details that I suspected were going on.
My take on it is that the for profit upper stratta of the Church of $ was using this copyright ploy to market the materials to take funds from the non profit part of the devious structure and transfer it to the for profit ASI and Bridge etc.
Since all that was copyrighted were the changes that were made in the materials it was really a scam of scams with “self dealing” likely in the form of huge bonuses and commissions slipped in there is my opinion.
For specifics on “self dealing” read The IRS Closing Agreement on thiss link page “(look at the IRS Closing document on link page only of the site
All this was done while pauperizing the sections below of the structure that were supposed to be “servicing “the public.
Anyway I recall your story some years ago when the European public would complain about the exchange rate when the dollar was high. When asked about it you would do the math on it and then overtly stated that they were in fact paying more than what they thought it cost them in the currency fluctuations.
That was unheard of coming from the mouth of a registrar.
Hy – an epic story! And what a loved Being you are judging from these comments! Here’s a apt tune to celebrate your independence 🙂
😆 Bwahahahahaha 😆
Wow, Hy. I’m so impressed by your write up. Thanks for this. And WELCOME!!!!!
Hi 40 year veteran.
Having been in Scientology that long you must be of the philosophic type.
Having your integrity in is a must for types like us. It is such an important game and so exciting also.
When you come out into the open and make your statement it is exhilerating!!
Yes dm, one of your phoney gold pillars just fell over…
is really great to see you here with the Indipendents. I liked you as a DofP and as a Reg. You were very straight forward and honest. Sorry for Paola, I hope she gets out soon!
All the best for your future. I am sure we will meet again soon.
Hey OSA BOTS, how do you like that?? Pretty cool huh?
Why not you next, you would have some awesome stories and someone would even help you get re-started…
Thank you for announcing your Independence. There will be a wave of additional announcements soon…………..
Finally, people can get LRH Tech without being harassed and having money and time extorted from us. Remember “It’s never time or money”. Yeah, right………….
Hello, Hy! I remember you from my SFO days. Gosh what a great org that was – and it is always great to hear well of my SFO friends!
I will definitely contact Marty and get your email so we can stay in comm.
Glad to hear from you!
Thanks for your kind words. Would love to meet you one day too.
Hi Mary Jo (and Tony!!),
Actually, the “medical handling” bit was sort of an acceptable truth. I did have some physical conditions at the time…now much less so.
Anyway, good to be in touch again. Miss you guys.
I got divorced in 2006 so, no, my wife did not come with me. I look forward to getting toegther with you and Mary Jo in the not too distant future.
I’m glad you feel any ARCx’s we had were “petty”. I always liked you and wanted to see you make it. I guess now you can.
I will get your contact info from Marty. I hate mysteries. Look forward to being in touch.
When I was last at FSO Paul Miller was still very much alive and well and still on post as a reg. Unlikely that that has changed.
Some staff were sent to the RPF as a “head on a pike” when things sometimes got way out of control, but I doubt Paul would be one of them.
I will contact you via Marty. You’re right I am curious who is out there. Seems I’m almost as much in shock as you guys are. It’s like we have all been in the same room and didn’t know it until someone turned the lights on.
I look forward to finding out who you are.
Unbeknownst to you I’ve seen most of your videos. It was nice to have a familiar face from which to hear the things I needed to hear about.
I know what you went through and I experienced the other side of the coin when you left and Harold was recalled to Flag as I was still on the inside then. Amazing what a shift of viewpoint does to one’s understanding of the same events.
What one does is to breathe fresh air and stop being in fear all the time.
It is actually easy. In fact, even though I am almost 60 years old, I felt like I was 23 again and just starting out in life with all the adventurous spirit I had then. It was actually fun (and dangerously scary which made it more fun) to have the challenge of rebuilding myself and my life from scratch.
Quite invigorating actually when there are no artificial restraints and there isn’t someone there who is going to tell you you’re in trouble if you screw something up. You just go out and do it until you get it right.
I hope you stop “lurking” in the shadows and come out into the light soon. Remember Book I and Lake Tanganyika. Shadows cannot imprison you, only you can do that.
“I told him that it was public paying for services that was supposed to finance Scientology and that these other donations were no where to be found in LRH policy”
Good work. Also, all the “4rd dynamic” solicitation is forbidden, not just not mentioned, by LRH. There’s many policies on this including HCO PL Changing Workable Finance Systems, but here’s another one:
“So we always make it the first condition of a group to make its own way and be prosperous on its own efforts.
“The key to such prosperity is exchange.
“One exchanges something valuable for something valuable.
“Processing and training are valuable. Done well, they are priceless.
In many ways an exchange can occur. Currently it is done with money.
“In our case processing and training are the substances we exchange for the materials of survival.
“To exchange something, one must find or create a demand.
He must then supply the demand in EXCHANGE for the things the group needs.”
from HCO PL 3 DECEMBER 1971
I have to say, your own post inspired me in many ways to write mine as I did. I learned a lot from yours about things I didn’t fully know about.
I always felt it was hypocritical that at FSO we professed to deliver standard tech to our PC’s, but in the back room we threw the book out the window and did things we would NEVER want the public to find out about. Now that I’m out, I am slightly amazed at how staff can live with themselves knowing they live a double life of hypocrisy. I don’t know how I did it myself, except I never really got into it much and always felt bad about it.
Here’s to the freedom that we all deserve and that people like you are making possible by speaking up!
yes, for a while I never knew what happened to you and then I guess saw something you posted and then I knew.
I remember a staff meeting where I think you had either just finished the Class IX course or maybe it was Class XII. Anyway, you gave a talk that I found very stirring. I admired you very much. I’m not sure how your story went but I assume it was something along the lines of trying to apply the tech as you understood it and being handled (mishandled) in ethics for not doing it the way you were being ordered to. Or something like that.
Glad to be on the same team again.
Glad to be in touch with you. I know you had some strange cycles. Glad that’s over for you.
Dear A 40 Yr Scientologist,
I’m glad I have helped you. I wish I knew who you are so I could properly thank you for all your kind words. Maybe in due time.
The only thing that kept me sane over the years was doing what I thought LRH wanted me to do on a given post. Sometimes I had to do it in a way that was only real to me that what I was doing was right. I did help people because well…that was why I was there. What other reason could there be to put up with the environment and the conditions unless it was something you really believed in.
I will always remember, just before I re-joined the S.O. in 1985, a client of mine took me to lunch as a send off knowing I was leaving. She asked me what I was going to do. I told her. Fully. She was a “wog” but amazingly enough her response was “I wish I had something like that that I believed in so strongly that I wanted to dedicate my life to it.” Not a bad perception. I think most decent people just want to help others. Look at some of the most heart warming movies you’ve ever seen. If you look closely they are about help.It must be a pretty universal common denominator.
Let’s just keep doing that in whatever we do. It’s really the only “pay” that’s worth anything.
Isn’t that so amazing and sort of strange, but not really? I, too, while “in”
had quite a few “medical conditions” that would pop up—However, all (but one that helped me get out, due to SO much weird-o-ness on it) seemed to blow off, once I escaped out and find true freedom. I wish you great peace and happiness this Holidays!
What a warm, warm, warm welcome from so many Independents! Their favorite D of P and Reg.
After I read your debrief and as I read the warmest welcomes from ALL Independents here, one thing comes to mind:
The Sea Org represented by you… as given in your write up about the life you gave to it. The Sea Org not as a structure that SO is dead but the Sea Org as a function as LRH intended and DID make it out of people like you.
Having served for 9 years the 4th dynamic as Sea Org myself and recognizing in 2000 that my job (as Sea Org) was to be OUT and PUTTING ETHICS IN, I salute you brother and comrade and welcome you back into the battle on a completely NEW field. And this time there is no LRH as a physical being around. It’s just US now, but we are many and stronger than before.
So, today with your appearance and declaration of Independence here we have moved MUCH higher UP. I felt that as I was reading all the comments of each Independent here. That was 4.0 and above.
My hat is off to the Sea Org and its people, like you, who after having dedicated their whole life to it don’t give a damn about some guy there called DM suppressing everybody but can destroy the whole thing because it’s a LIE and can start re-creating (=recruiting, re-crescere), making grow again) the whole thing.
DM, yes you can hold onto to those rods tonight, you are gonna need them.
I am very proud I served in that Organization with people like you to forward the aims of Scientology the way LRH intended and envisioned it and you are a hell of an Administrator as you could apply 100% what the old man said, no matter who said differently.
Let’s carry on the process and let me know if you are getting hatted on iPhones too as I am doing some projects with the iPhone, hahaha! So, brother I salute you and welcome you warmly here in the Independent Scientology Field and this Forum.
Cheryl Rohnhaar, last I knew was still quite ill. I don’t really have any specifics except I saw her a couple of times when I was going to the Dr and she was going somewhere like that as well. She was pretty seriously ill. I couldn’t swear to it but I believe whatever it was was terminal.
The normal staff do not have any contact with those that are in that state. It is all kept very hush-hush. Sorry I can’t tell you more. She was a great lady that I first met when I was a D of P in 1986 and she was the Deputy Senior C/S. I went into a bit of a spin due to lack of sleep and other factors and she personally came to see me and pulled me out of it. She used to refer to LRH as “the Boss”. Great lady.
Don’t worry. I ain’t goin’ nowhere. I’m here.
I’m so happy my videos helped—that’s why I make them 🙂 (*When I first left, I called Stacy back to say: “I am NOT going to make ANY videos, picket or speak out”)–but as you can see, things change. Actually, it was ALL the families I spoke with, who had lost their kids, and loved ones, that got me to start.
Amazing that you heard the other side, re my exit, and Harold.
I’d love to hear it sometime when you’re ready–if ever. I pretty much know the drill, as I have seen their endless lies about “she left her husband” for 10 years, as well as many others. They’ve been pretty consistent with me, to their loss, and many people’s joy.
Welcome home 🙂 I love you Hy…you always were a good man, now you can do what you came to do: Help, without the stops and bad control you suffered through. This should be a great holiday for you! 🙂
I have been in comm with Carol so I know who you are now.
You give me much too much credit to think that a little post from me is going to affect DM in any big way. He wields total control over everyone in the Church. It will, to borrow from LRH, take a “shoulder to shoulder” effort from a lot of people to change anything. What Marty, Mike, Steve, Amy and Jeff (to name a few) have done with their broadly disseminated video interviews is to foment a “peaceful reformation” that will eventually replace the current scene. No one needs to “put a stake” in anyone’s heart. Shooting themselves in the foot is a phrase that comes to mind and will more likely be the reason for any upheaval that will occur.
I mean come on, with the amount of criminality that I alone saw, and I saw only a fraction of it (and only wrote about a fraction of THAT) they are bound to make the ultimate mistake themselves one day soon and bring about more harm to themselves than anything I could ever do. Plus, I even feel it is a shame that they cannot be brought around. Can you imagine if all that energy and power were used for good? We’d be on our way to a civilized society.
Unfortunately I’m not holding my breath waiting for that to happen.
I will admit that I guess I owed it to other unsuspecting people to let them know what was going on. There’s more to say and over time I will say it, but for now if I and you and all of us can just start to wake people up, we will be moving in the right direction.
I better stop now or I’ll be using phrases like “keep the faith baby” and date myself a bit.
Glad to be in touch with you.
Thank you for your writeup Hy. I have been so dismayed by what I read on this and other blogs as to how the SO staff have been so very very badly treated and ordered about in such a climate of hostility and aggression. It is downright painful to read it – I can only imagine how painful it was to live it.
I too am hoping that Steve Kemper will show up on this blog one of these days. He was my reg for many, many years and I loved him dearly for his honesty and care. It was completely dismaying to walk in one day and find him gone and no one would tell me anything. That hurt too. And it made me EXTREMELY suspicious when coupled with the obvious outpoints I was seeing coming from “command intention.”
Truly wonderful to see such a warm welcome! Here’s a little video for you,
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to ALL 🙂
My memory was a cut rate factory rebuild and came with no warrantee at all.
I do recall instances similar to the one you describe, but not this one exactly. I don’t want you to feel that it had no significance for me or anything, and I’m sure as soon as I learn your name it will all come flooding back to me.
Also, unfortunatley, your situation wasn’t all that unique. Both as D of P and reg I ran into this more than you care to imagine.
Oneperson that I recall was going to be told that he could do training or L’s but not Solo NOTS. And I was supposed to be the one to tell him. No way. So I routed myself to Qual as I saw no valid reason to deny him this service. He never knew anything about it. I saw the cramming officer and asked him what HCOB’s and HCOPL’s on the subject of eligibility did I not know about. He gave me a wry smile and said “You know all the references. There aren’t any others.” So, as I couldn’t stand to see this happen, and even though I had the normal post randomity of a NOTS D of P flying around as usual, I wrote a very detailed CSW to Senior C/S FSO, Jon Eastment at the time, showing point by point and reference by reference why I felt this was an arbitrary and not covered in any policy. Realize, the order to tell him he wasn’t eligible had come from the Deputy Senior C/S already AND the folder had already been reviewed by Senior C/S Int who wrote the program that was being operated on and used as the basis for him not being eligible.
Well, I wrote this l-o-n-g CSW. Realize, I had been in the SO less than a year and had no tech training to speak of. But I had fire in my eye and I guess I didn’t know that this was “not the way things were done”.
Well no one was more surprised than me when the folder came back and all that was written on it, by the Senior C/S, was “APPROVED” on my CSW.
This alone was a lesson in integrity that kept me going for many years. It didn’t matter really who you were or your position or anything. It only mattered if you were right and if you cared enough to see that the right thing was done.
So, I apologize for not recalling teh specifics of your own instance, but unfortunately it is all to similar to others that I ran into over the years.
If I was of help, I am glad of that.
Of course I remember you. I also remember the total create you put into your post with all your great artwork and games you played with the Solo auditors. I was sorry to see you leave for, I think it was CMU, but was proud to know you when I saw ads that came out that I found out you had written for Scientology dissemination.
I have also been reading your posts for many months and have seen the few video interviews I could find that you did since you left.
Great to be in touch.
As a personal test of your memory, do you remember a particular illustration you did for Richard Reiss that had an item in it callled “Valerie II”. That was one of my all time favorites and I laughed every time I saw it in his office.
It’s wonderful that you’re out. Congratulations Mr. Brave Man. I have to stay under the blanket for a while longer. We know each other — think “Moishe”
This is just the BEST CHRISTMAS EVER!!!!!!!
Just to be totally fair, it wasn’t all black, and in earlier years things were much closer to what LRH envisioned. There are always some staff who are going to violate policy and unfortunately when they get into a position of authority, this then affects many others.
It is really only in recent years that things were as I described. Maybe I was a bit blind and it was there to some degree for a much longer period of time, but in the end for sure it was as I described.
Just to borrow a phrase Marty has used himself, I was no “Little Lord Fauntleroy” all the time myself. I did make mistakes and I did commit overts. But in the cases where it had any detrimental effect on the public, their cases or their well-being, most of the time I ended up setting things straight in the end.
What I couldn’t take was that I was being asked to continue to be part of a group that I was ashamed to be associated with. I think there are many staff who actually feel as I did and one day we will see them here too.
Hello Hy! Thank you for your thorough write up and for your dedication to LRH and real Scientology! I had tears in my eyes from all the wonderful theta beings reconnecting up. Just in a win that all of you are here and as we are all immortal – will always be.
Oi, Hy Levy, Mazzeltov.
Dear Dave LaCroix,
I think possibly you have overstated my importance.
I don’t mind having a bulls eye on me. I think they have only blanks in their “guns” so I’m not particualrly concerned about this.
I don’t actually feel I was betraying anyone. Maybe this sounds strange to you. Those that were the perpetrators or those who condoned and/or forwarded what they knew was wrong need the bright light of truth trained on them.
Those who were also bothered by what they saw but didn’t have the strength to stand up to it, well I feel am doing them a service by speaking up. As an S.O. member your information line is so controlled that you do not have any idea of what is really going on….even right in your area. For whatever reason, I could see through things and see them for what they were that other staff just didn’t see.
At staff meeting, when a staff member was being “roasted” in front of the whole crew (a torture justified as being based on LRH’s “Flaps and Handlings” section of the HCO PL on Staff Meetings which I guarantee is nowhere in writing as such) I was nauseated to see what occurred. Not everyone saw it the way I did. I guess they were a bit relieved that it wasn’t them up there. Me, when I had to go up and tell my tale of woe of a flap I had, well I just told it straight, suffered through it and I didn’t get too much of a hard time. Maybe it was because I was overall well liked and maybe it was because I didn’t try to fight it but just went through it and was glad when it was over.
In any case, I have always been a bit of a scrapper and this seemed like a good time to get into the ring.
I think others are in the same boat and we will see them soon.
La Chaim! (For gentiles this means “To Life” whihc happens to be my Hebrew name…Chaim).
La Chaim ;), Nice to see you declare your Independance at a Time DM declares victory over those pesky Anons in an Internal Church Magazine.
Yes Hy, I’m afraid you are right. Cheryl’s had been ill for years. I love her dearly she helped me a great deal during very tough times for me.
On a lighter note – I spoke with my ex-husband this evening and asked if he remembered you. Indeed he did. I asked if he knew you as a reg or DofP — he said reg. He said he liked you so much he always gave you money.
Not something he says lightly. Getting money out of him was either through coercion or just cuz he wanted to buy more auditing. He was never a fan of the gun to the head regging …
You obviously didn’t subscribe to that either.
Again – glad you are out!!
Well done. I’d love to communicate more with you via e-mail. Marty can give you the address.
Hy, your post will most definitely effect DM………in a huge way. The last thing he wants to see is somebody who has left get a huge welcome from people who are out. It’s all about ARC, something he knows nothing about. The ARC, the welcomes, the happy people who are doing well and last but not least, the application of standard tech, that is the stake in his blackened heart. We don’t have to do it to him. He’s doing it all by himself and to himself.
ps. Very glad to hear from you too.
I’m a public from the Midwest and have known Hy since the mid-70’s, shortly after he got in the SO. The way we describe someone like him: “Hy is good people.”
That’s a high compliment where I come from. He’s off the top on the decency scale. Glad you are doing well.
Doubt you remember me; maybe my name, maybe not. But I think I was either the internship supervisor or in Dept 1 when you joined the FSO.
The buzzword when you joined was “a guy with all 3 L’s joined staff” And of course “Hy Levy joined staff!!!”
Bless you Hy, for hanging in there all those years. Quite a story. You are strong for having such conviction — but stronger still, for drawing the line when you recognized the betrayal of your dreams.
You know, there is always a staff member or 3 or 4 who are the ones that maintain their integrity during tumultuous times. They are the guys who other staff say “Man, you really need someone to help you out with that — go see so and so — he’ll straighten it out and won’t quit until it is”. You were one of those guys. They are far and few between, but they are the ones who really hold the place together — the unsung heroes.
And there ya go, that’s you. (This also, incidentally, defines most of the Independents as I’m sure you know).
Linda McCarthy aks Spanky, aka Darla
Super cool, Hy and CD!
I love that! 🙂
Thank you for being YOU !! You made this beautiful day more beautiful!
You should be aware that you will soon be getting a phone call from a dirtbag named DAVID LEBEAU (sp?) . I’m pretty sure he isn’t one who experienced your comptence, care and loyalty while on staff but I am pretty sure you are on his “things to do” list. He is a DAVID MISCAVIGE Private Investigator who loves sucking as much money from CSI coffers into his own pockets ( and I’m pretty sure into a few G-Strings at Gay bars in Texas, Florida and other places his midget majesty has flown him to) for which you worked hard at stuffing!
I look forward to hearing more from you?
BTW, where you still at FSO in July 2009 when I and many others stopes by to say HELLO FLAG??
Thanks again Hy!!
HY!!! Oh…my God! I almost fell out of my chair when I saw your face appear on my screen! And then..tears welled up in my eyes when I read your story. Hy…you and I have been around a lot of blocks together…esp. when you were my D of P . Sherry Many Katz. Remember when you “forbid” Judy Heuelsman, Genevra Shaw and Me to show up at FSO at the same time?? LOL. We gave you some of that salt and pepper hair. You WERE the best D of P in the Solo Nots HGC…no doubt about it.
Hy..I’m just so happy to see you here, to know that you are doing well. You are a wonderful person and I wish you the very very best in your new life
Take good care,
Hello Hy Levy,
I remember your name from the staff meetings at the FSO. As you have worked until 2009 at the FSO, can you tell me if Christian Winter, the German FSO bookstore officer from the early nineties, is still a staff member at the FSO?
With regards to the weekly GI of the FSO, how was the average weekly gross income from 1993 until 2009? I know that it was around $ 1,400,000 – 1,500,000 in 1992. And it had already gone down since the days of Ron Norton as CO FSO. Did the trend continue through the nineties?
Welcome out Hy!
You were one of the (few) decent people to deal with at Flag. Well done on making things go right since!
You were D of P at the Sandcastle and I was summoned and ordered to Flag to be sec checked on a bogus KR. (under threat of declare)
$50,000 was ripped off of me to pay for this GROSS auditing, done over the top of my 6 months of HELL at INT (never repaired)
They gave me my 13th Jo’berg. That’s right, I had previously had 12 Jobergs, and another 30 some hours at Sandcastle rates was ripped off to get through my 13th Joberg Sec Check.
I refused to write a success story and blew to stay at the Marriott at Tampa Airport to destimulate before catching a plane. I expected they would check flights out, so hid at the Marriot for almost 48 hours before catching a plan back to Los Angeles. The year was 1991.
I was considered an “Ethics Particle.”
I could see how very very much off the rails FSO had become.
I never EVER returned.
It was very saddening as I was one of the Class XIIs, LRH trained on the Flagship Apollo that contributed greatly to revenue, VSD and keeping the ship afloat (only6 Class XIIs at the time) so that LRH could continue his research and be safe.
I experienced and witnessed and saw the deterioration and money fixation at the Flag Land Base even in 1991 and it was ugly .
It’s all about the Dollar and STATS
It continues to get progressively worse, ripping off $$$ for no exchange “Ideal orgs, IAS, Bogus Library campaigns, etc. etc. ”
I could mentally do the comparisons to the Original Flag on the Apollo and what FSO had evolved into even back in 1991. On the ship no one approached a Public for any money ever than the Apollo HGC service.
Your write up confirms so many reports of enforced SLEEP DEPRIVATION to make QUOTAS and the relentless phone calls for $$$$
for the basics.
They debited my account and sent me boxes and boxes of the stuff unauthorized purchases using credit from my account. I shipped the back
“RETURN to SENDER” writing “UNAUTHORISED PURCHASE” on the boxes and the UPS guy told me, that at the HUB, it had been noticed and on record what HUGE amounts of
RETURN to SENDER was being sent back to C of S in Clearwater.
I explained how it was completely unauthorized.
In the world we live in it is called THEFT.
Welcome Hy, thanks much for your detailed write up which is so well received.
Best wishes and Bright Blessings !
Hey Hy, Hi!
Excellent on your coming forth and adding your abundant power to the real Scientology group; the Indies of Scientology.
You are a celebrity and an OL, use your power to help get rid of the suppression in Scientology. .
Great writeup of a bird’s eye view of the insanity behind the DoP and reg lines in the selling of the Basics is enlightening and so important. Thanks so much and best wishes, Hy.
Publicity and “wierd attention” from the church over my not being there any more is not anything that is needed and wanted in this part of the universe.
L. Ron Hubbard said something once about what to do when something very enturbulating comes onto one’s lines. He said to just cut communication with it. Scientology is one of those enturbulating things, at least for me.
Let’s see, you are 60 years old, or almost? My sister is an absolute *FOX* and she is always looking for an ethical date, so you see, if you wanted to really feel 23 again, you are off to a good start!
When I come out of the shadows *Perhaps*, perhaps, because she is a private person, but likes to laugh a lot.
“We have onlines public and staff out of apathy and up into fear and 1.5.” What I meant to say is I believe people are coming uptone from apathy. I was thinking of John Allender or that other dude from the video when I wrote it. Sorry if I confused anyone.
You face is very familiar. I applaude you for speaking your mind and taking a stand. I keep seeing similarities between the CofM and current government. For instance, this WikiLeaks situation. Ron Paul made a good comment re: not shooting the messenger and the fact that when truth becomes treason then watch out! The more people talk about the craziness in the church in contrast to the sanity of pure LRH, the better off everyone will be. You are instrumental in exposing the worm in the apple so to speak. Thank you.
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(Just a little tired and worn-down Aussie “humour” from one of your former SN Auditors!)
I can’t tell you how happy I am to read that you’re outta there and free of them. My best wishes for a wonderful future. 🙂
Cheers mate, Panda.
Thanks very much for the story & it’s very awesome that you kept in your personal integrity! I’m sure we’ve seen each other at Flag at various times, though we’ve never talked or known each other. Really great to see your declaration of independence and recent real account at the “Mecca.”
I am not very tech trained but it seems odd that a Class 0 would be posted on a NOTS D of P post. Perhaps there is nothing out tech about it, but still it seems odd. I admire you for sticking to it and still making it go right, the insanity of DM’s circus notwithstanding.
Good of you to join the independent field. I look forward to hearing more of your wins.
WELL HY, BY NOW YOU SHOULD BE AMAZED TO SEE HOW MANY OF US ARE HERE AND DOING WELL AND HAPPY… AND WE ALL WELCOMED YOU WITH OPEN ARMS, YOU HAVE A GROUP NOW A TRUE GROUP…WOULD LOVE TO KNOW WHERE ARE YOU LIVING, AND THAT WAY MAYBE CONNECT….. OTHERWISE I’M SURE THAT ON OUR NEXT INDEPENDENTS EVENT I WILL SEE YOU, YOU CAN COUNT WITH A BIG HUG AND KISS…. THANKS AGAIN FOR YOUR COURAGE…
Can I get an Amen to that brudder!!!!
That story about the TRD was the same ….er…phenomenon I experienced i.e. the reports that I wrote on all the out tech and off policy were being “handled” as BPR lines.
That’ll by pass charge for sure!
Love the line about HSM saying something like if he didn’t know about it then it must wrong.
The guys is truly a walking oxymoron with emphasis on the last two syllables
That is a know nothing know it all.
If hubris was a commodity he’d be set for life and wouldn’t have to torture us with his unwelcome presence.
Anyway I hope you are as happy as we are on the outside looking.
Again welcome aboard!
Actually, You did a very good job of communicating that you had accomplished much good during your SO tenure, and that you were proud if it, rightfully so!
Often times what a person doesn’t say speaks volumes! It’s not just “reading between the lines” but reading ” outside” the lines. You dedicated 24 years to your church and keep returning to continue helping others. Clearly you had a great rapport with the public and other staff. That probably makes it harder to leave. This was just a write up of why you left. There is probably more on why you stayed.
This is phenomenal and wonderful news! You were always very kind and very real. Thank you for your story. It’s a long one! But then so is 24 years!
It was worth the read! I am glad you spoke of the over-the-top full blown insanity. As public you always saw the PR front but knew there was craziness beneath the calm. Staff were looking pretty haggard around what was the end for me. Thank you for the truth, particularly about the Basics frenzie and for not feeding that monster any more! So amazing that you had the will power to put up with 18 mos. of routing out properly. I’m very curious about some of your fellows that were on the scene in recent times. If you can email me perhaps I can be specific. You didn’t know me well as I was, I guess, run of the mill public. But you may know my name. You are probably being bombarded with requests to get in touch! But…if you can that would be great.
You write well and hopefully, you will continue writing!
I am so happy for you that you are back in your profession and thriving! What freedom. You deserve it! They all do. Hopefully you’ve opened the door a crack so others can get out!
Who is John Gault?
Well from my perspective, it looks like YOU is John Gault!
The “Brain Drain” that is occurring now in the C of S is creating a whirlpool – drawing independent minded Scientologists into it’s ever more powerful vortex.
I like the theme of individual liberty that Ayn Rand advocated in the book “Atlas Shrugged”. To me it is an effective allegory of what is happening in the C of S right now. Individuals are objective, extroverted and realistic. Collectivists are subjective, introspective, and abstract.
The C of S – via David Miscavige has inculcated a collective slavery in it’s parishioners. And as my friend KA so aptly points out, “Slavery” (8-8008) is “being positioned in another’s space and time” –LRH.
As many can attest, being positioned in Miscavige’s space and time is no picnic. Especially if you are a “good slave” and go along with the program. But as all who have hung in there for the long-haul like you and many others did, the end result is that you either break free or become (as another under-the-radar buddy of mine) says, “a theta rock”.
Thank you for coming out and proclaiming the truth. The solidity and stupidity of all of those “theta rocks” in the virtual “Rock Quarry” that the C of S has become will surely dissolve in the whirlpool of universal solvent which is Independent Scientology.
So, Hy – here’s to you.
It is very helpful getting all this data from you to help as-is the charge connected to this group engram.
Being at Flag I would see the Sea Org members doing very odd things. Hounding people for basics, constant regging, lack of sleep and them doping off in session and the MAAs doping off during interviews,etc. I wrote this stuff up to no avail. I too would be called in for a Dof P to be ganged up on by a couple of SO members from the HGC to sell me basics, sometimes even my current auditor.
All the things that you describe are very believable.
The overall view for me is that there is a madman at the helm. Only a madman would not only allow but encourage this type of behavior at the highest levels of Scientology.
I salute you for doing your best to out-create it as a lot of us did, though maybe not as earnestly as yourself. I salute you for having the courage to change directions and now do something effective to really get down to basic-basic.
We here are making history. I truly believe that.
Now is the time to step up and deliver an effective blow to the tyrant!
Long live Scientology, the true Scientology!
Yeah, I know, Tony.
I just needed something from John Gault to post for HY.
The main theme of the speech was RATIONALITY. So I went with it.
Thank you for your huge validation of what I did. I guess I felt that it was my responsibility to use my lines and influence to do for the public what they couldn’t do for themselves. It’s like since I was entrusted with these comm lines I had to use them to the benefit of the people I worked with.
For me that was the most rewarding part. I’m glad to know it was effective.
Yes, for a short time I was Holly’s communicator. But shortly after I was posted she was sent to Flag for training and her post was covered by Bob and Loy Young. They were wild to have as seniors and I have many crazy stories I could tell about that time. Like when Bob got it into his head one night at midnight to go down to San Pedro and order the then Captain of the Excalibur, Riggs Eckleberry, to start the engines and take the ship out when the crew were already fast asleep. He did it as a lark just to see how the crew did. Pretty crazy.
Happy to be back in comm.
O.M.G.!!! HY! I’m so happy for you that you got out! You weren’t my reg (except for maybe once) but I saw you every time. I liked you then and felt you were sincere and had personal integrity.
Welcome and so glad you are here!!!
I don’t read here often Hy, but for some reason your story drew me in. I thought it was incredibly well written and I appreciate the behind the scenes view of the basics evolution at Flag. (It’s pretty much what I expected). I can relate to much of your story, and as a staff member I am much like yourself. I too took pride in doing my best, trying to stay focused on delivering what was promised in spite of all the noise and distractions and pressure to do otherwise, and in the end the criminal exchange in return for for my contribution simply reached a point of being intolerable. I’m glad your story has a happy ending and you have now regained the freedom which should have been yours all along. I think we go through many layers of recovery after we get out from under the yoke of the organization and I wish you well as you go forward. Perhaps your journey into Scientology was very much about finding your own spirituality. Now it’s onto the next level. I wish you all the best.
I was blown away by your video. Thanks for the many kind words. It’s good to see you again.
How about another clue. I’m drawing a blank on “Moishe”.
Great to be in touch. I’ll contact Marty and get your email!
I liked your words Scott, better than those of John Gaults.
Of course I remember…and the order still stands…except re-word it to “forbidden to show up together anywhere!!”. Just kidding. You guys WERE wild and I couldn’t handle all 3 of you at once. But I love you all and look forward to when we can see each other again.
Thanks for your heartfelt wishes for my future.
Christian Winter was still staff at FSO when I left. Not sure of his post.
FSO GI went to stably above $ 2,000,000 for some years. Before I went off post in 2009 however, it was not so good. In addition at various times, due to HUGE amounts of book debits being done (which later were controlled very closely) the spendable income was in dire straights at times. This is because, when books are sold, whether for new cash paid in or by debits, the amount of money they sold for had to be deposited in the HCO book account. When debits got to be in the hundreds of thousands in a given week, this meant the new GI made by selling services had to go to the Book Account. You can imagine the strain this put on the FP.
That’s what I can tell you.
I remember you quite fondly. I tried to reach you over the years when you “disappeared”. Now I know where you went.
Good to hear from you.
In all my studies I found no requirement that the D of P be tech trained. I do recall LRH mentioning early on that the D of P should not be auditing but running the HGC. This implied that at one time the D of P was a trained auditor and LRH didn’t want him doing the auditing but getting his auditors to audit. But I saw no reference that required a D of P to have auditor certs. It certainly would be useful, but not mandatory.
It did require an OK to operate an E meter and definitely good TR’s and comm cycle, but that would be it.
No out tech there that I know of.
Real simple isn’t it?
Tony me brotha’
Notice that I replied to you before your reply posted.
I got it on the prime comm line.
Thanks for sharing that Karen. I hope some on-lines church public read this.
13 Joburgs? Those Flag C/Ses must be total idiots, or they just hated you, or they were ordered to violate their integrity. Granted, I really enjoyed grade 2 and my Joburg. I consider it a closed cycle, and I would not accept a squirrel C/S for another one.
Summoned to Flag under threat of declare? Like LRH said, if everyone bared his chest to cannonballs, the threat of war would cease. Imagine if nobody was scared of OSA, or of communicating with their declared friends? The power of OSA would disappear. Actually, OSA staff would really benefit from heavy MEST work, auditing and extensive confessionals.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. People like you, the dedicated Sea Org members and staff, who simply wanted to help mankind, and worked tirelessly to do that, are some of the best people in the world. I’m glad we have you in our midst now and that you are happy and doing well.
Paul Miller. That big fat guy! I met him. He asked me one day to go over to Pic Kwik on the corner by Court Street near the FH and get him a “Big Gulp”, which is a GIGANTIC cup of soda with ice in it and a straw, about a 64 oz. drink. He couldn’t wait to get it. I was going to ask him “Hey, are you really going to drink all of that?”, but I guessed if he gave me the money and asked me to get it, then that is EXACTLY what he intended to do.
Thanks for your desire to really help while on staff.
Thanks to DM for being soo “unreasonable” and pushing so many good people out. He’ll soon have only a handful of cowed and ill being following his every “command intention” to get him to his destination. Which is???
Duly noted. Theta line is much faster.
This thread reminded me of an incident at Flag.
I told them in one of my interviews that it seemed to me that Flag did not know how to handle OT’s. I always thught from reading LRH that we were trying to create independent thetans who could handle horsepower and sometimes blew their stacks over stupidity and would get ethics protection from headquarters (Flag) because we were the ones making things happen. After being slapped around a few times (figuritivly) I felt that they couldn’t really handle powerful thetans. As if to prove my point they did roll-back on me to find out where this enemy line came from. I asked them if others had said it and they said ” Oh yes!!”. Well, I told them that I generated this myself and I couldn’t remember anyone else telling me that.
I am sure that it was generated by several people because it was true and wasn’t an enemy line.
Thank you for the welcome. I am honored to be counted as a member of a group which includes such giants as yourself and those who make this blog a living force in the fight for real freedom. Glad to be in.
Thank you for your post! You gave me a brilliant idea as Black Adder’s sidekick would say, When I am ready to come out I will start answering those 727 caller id numbers instead of just not being home and do what you did. “No I don’t want to donate to something that is clearly violating LRH policy! Yes the one where LRH says, you don’t have to have before you can do and where he talks about criminal exchange and where he said to shoot the senior that trys to get you focus on MEST and where etc etc. ” I shall have all the policies at hand that are being violated. When the calls dry up because I’ve been blacklisted I’ll come out. It might be inspirational to the staff person to be talking to a member who is “in good standing” yet is not afraid to say what is true! The fifth column was very effective in the last world war and has value as an activity.
Thank you for taking the time to write this lengthy account. Sounds like you are doing great applying LRH in your “new life.” OTs should be taking positions of responsibility, respect, success in their communities and lives, and they can and will if not hounded and drained! That’s not “1st dynamic” – it is what LRH expects us to do! (Sorry, I can’t remember the name of the PL reference on this).
I have one additional 3rd/4th Dynamic comment: OMITTED CONTROLLER FUNCTION. This is another consequence of collapsing the “Office of the Controller” (ref. HCO PL of this title, which established the old Guardian’s Office as an autonomous unit to oversee financial and legal regularities among along with other functions).
In most corporations the Board of Directors would be responsible for such gross financial irregularities, but the genesis of this insanity seems to be the “Chairman of the Board” himself. There is no real controller anymore. Ludicrous, but predictable.
Hy, your speaking out is making waves, and that boat does need rocking!
🙂 I’m sooooooooooo happy you enjoyed it. I’m very proud of you, Hy!
Great job getting out, and even better…speaking out. Thanks to Marty,
Mike and all here who are helping create a safe place for people who want
to use the tech, but not put up with ALL the hassles of the phony “church”.
I’m SO happy you’re here~!
I had that *exact* response to seeing Hy’s name and face, and then
reading his story. Oh! You and I have some funny stories from back then,
too. What a great Christmas/Holidays for ALL 🙂 Love you!
To *anyone* still “in” and lurking, are you getting what we mean when we
say “come on out….the water is just fine”? THIS CHRISTMAS *IS* THE TIME! Take it, grab your bag and walk across the street. Call a loved one to come get you, or if in LA, call me. If you’re fit—just start walkin 🙂
You don’t “owe” anyone anything. The greatest shock for me when I finally escaped out was finding out just how many wonderful people were OUT, and that was 10 years ago!!! Merry Christmas to all 🙂
Hello Hy! I was a solo nots pc and was regged by you many times with my 2D I left before you did and was suprised and happy to see you on this board!! Keep letting everyone know! DM will go down eventually.
I guess we will all end up out here!
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LRH also said something about confronting and what happens to you when you hide, always afraid of being found out. That you’re here at all is thanks to many people simply confronting. The only reason Davey has any power at all, and all the power he has, is people not confronting. He goes coconuts anytime confront goes up and locks come off because that’s the only thing really hitting his totalitarian domination. Because a large group is afraid of being disconnected, he can threaten them into non confront. But he’d loose all power instantly the moment everybody would say: Davey boy, you’re an SP and I don’t play anymore. He could then disconnect everybody from the Church but that would leave everybody completely free to communicate to everybody else. It’s only the fear of the shades of Tanganyika that keeps fish confined and that happens to be the very mechanism of how the bank is constructed and perpetuated. The very things you’re afraid of, keep you from reaching and thus make you effect. Raising confront is a scary thing but ask anyone on this blog who has done so if it pays off or what makes a free being. You may want to do it on the right gradient though as too much too soon could get somewhat explosive.
Was and is I am certain a diabetic. His order to you to go to Pic Kwic for the slurp, is a symptom of what a diabetic goes through.
No pun intended, that was my first impression of him too. Maybe someone else here can confirm he is a diabetic.
I heard from a friend about a VERY weird cycle where money from the account was UNAUTHORIZEDLY taken to deliver the new ACCs.
Christian Winter did that by end of September 2010. So up to then, he still was there for sure.
I used to hate that line. “Never time or money.” Just your own personal out-ethics for why you can’tpay us. Sick.
Yes indeed. A very simply laid out finance system.
Yeah, 13 JOBURGS!!
That degree of absurdity is hard to take. Geez Karen, you have way more forebearance than I’ll ever attain.
I got ONE Joburg and that was way plenty. I’m amazed at the tenacity to life of the beings I know here. Just in awe.
Thanks! I’ll do my best to help accomplish that.
Thanks. I’ve asked Marty for your email. I will definitely get in touch.
Why would David Lebow contact me? What would be the purpose?
No, I wasn’t there in July 2009 as I had Just left towards the end of June, but I did read about that get-together on Marty’s blog some time later.
You will definietly be hearing more from me as my post only scratched the surface.
I read something apropos to this idea of ‘can’t handle high-powered thetans’ on the 2nd ACC/Rehab of the Human Spirit series.
“How do you make an Operating Thetan better in his operation? And the more you could learn about that, you see, why, the happier one and all would be—within the certain limits that, of course, if you turn loose too many good, functioning Operating Thetans in a society in a universe which is entirely conditioned to religion, you have an almost immediate opportunity for slavery on the part of one and all— almost immediate.
“The whole machine is rigged, in this universe, in the direction of religion, superstition and so on. Well, it gets a certain distance, you see, and then unscrupulous, very uncleared, extremely fouled-up characters can come along, and unless you can produce quite a few—quite a few—Operating Thetans fairly easily, you just have no business triggering this figure-seven trap that is already set to trigger, called religion.”Plan of Auditing, 20 Nov 53.
This point, that the buttons that exist in R6, ‘trigger’ is operative in the scene you describe. Especially with DM, considering that an SP is overwhelmed in R6.
Truly capable, rehabbed, and operating thetans in any field can trigger all sorts of buttons. They get vilified, santified and crucified.
Now, with Scientology and trained OTs plying their trades, we’ve got a good shot at dealing with those buttons.
Here’s to you Tony. You scary ass OT!!!
There appears to b e quite a number of active, in-COS scientologists as your FB friends.
I would guess that they don’t know you have left, but would love to see you use the opportunity to let them all know the truth about what it is that they are supporting.
Happy as a clam to see that you are out!
Exellent point on the Controller.
The reference on the first point is an HCOB, 10 June 60, WHAT WE EXPECT OF A SCIENTOLOGIST.
“A Scientologist is the being three feet behind society’s head. And society runs on eight dynamics, not in a sick room. Some of us, of course, would become professional practitioners. But a professional Scientologist is one who expertly uses Scientology on any area or level of the society.”
Spanky (aka Linda),
I often found myself in the position of being the one who had to handle something because no one else did or could. I just felt it was my job, even if it didn’t directly relate to my post at the time. I loved my public so how could I turn my back on them if they needed help? I wasn’t afraid of anyone gtting pissed at me as I knew I was doing the right thing when I did.
I remember one time, back in around ’86 or ’87 I had a pc on lines who was not doing well on a specific step on OT V. This was before the New NOTS R/D’s came out in 1991 with all the hatting material (indoc packs then made available as part of each auditing step on OT V). Auditors were allowed to show them only certain references. This pre-OT was very confused about how or why a certain step was to be done.
Having read the NOTS packs cover to cover I knew the exact LRH datum she was missing, but as it wasn’t in the material to be shown to the public, and you couldn’t give verbal tech, it was a mess.
So I CSW’d to the C/S to show her this reference. I was given OK to show her only the part that specifically addressed what she needed to understand. So I took her into the interview with a NOTS pack, blocked off the rest of the page and showed her the reference I felt she needed to see. She read it, her eyes welled up with tears and she cried for joy at the release she got from just this one datum. That solved the entire problem and she flew through the rest of her auditing.
I guess I was too ignorant to understand why certain things were only done a certain way so I had no back off in suggesting new things that to me were the solution. Being a “breaker of rules” was something I enjoyed immensely.
I think I have an idea. Are you from Mexico and did I work with your brother a lot (as an FSM) when I came on post as a reg?
If so, boy am I glad to find you!
I too found much pleasure in the adventure of starting a new life. I was not at all intimidated by the scary parts because they were so much better than the boxed in suppression inside the church.
My experience with the church felt very much like an injured dove who was picked up, cared for and given a place of badly needed refuge only to be deceived when I was finally able to fly again. Instead of releasing me out into the world, they put me in a cage and clipped my wings. But one day, I learned to fly again and when I saw an opportunity to escape, I did and never looked back. With each step I took, my space grew bigger. It was scary and exciting at the same time!
I feel sorry for Christian but I admire him. He was the only FSO terminal that was able to keep his TR’s in for some time when I started telling him about Davey’s suppressive acts. All others that called to sell me something went either ballistic and hung up or told me that they’d report me to ethics and hung up or hung up. The problem with Christian is that he is not committing overts by selling LRH materials and thus he’ll last a long time no matter how screwed up things get.
OSA is craving for massive confessionals as the surest way to pull them in is forcing them onto others.
LOL, great picture!!
Money is not the motivation but slamming in anchor points is. Money and stats are simply justifications to commit overts and prevent anyone from speaking up. It’s the perfect excuse why you have to deprive sleep, set huge targets, fire 80% of the good staff, declare all good auditors, steal money, etc. The goal of a Rockslammer is to knock out Scientology and Scientologists because he’s terrified of OT’s as they can find out.
I appreciate your humility but I don’t think I understated your impact.
People that haven’t worked on the GI lines may not grasp how much the professional FSM’s influence the GI of the Church…especially at the FSO and upper Orgs.
The Daphna’s, and Mitch Televi’s, and Barry Klien’s, and Ty Dillards, and Steve Bezio’s and, god help us, Wendy & Joanne’s … on and on and on…will all become aware of your public disavowal soon, as well as the public you’ve helped directly, and these guys are VERY influential to thousands of the money’d brethren. And THAT is where the erosion will be accelerated.
So again, Thank You my friend. It’s a good day to be an Indie knowing you’re on board!
Diabetic? It can happen. A neighbor of mine was fine until last year. About 11 months ago he suddenly became diabetic and lost about 75 pounds what seemed like overnight! It can happen at any moment apparently to a person if their genetics are just so.
I have always felt a special kinship to good registrars having been one myself. A lot of what you communicated was very real to me even as a Class V reg.
I was fortunate enough to have cognited before the Basics debacle but did see the lead up to this with the Congresses. I was amazed at how quickly this enforced “have” de-evolved the orgboard of every org and mission around literally collapsing the network, nuclear bomb style, creating the biggest 3D engram since the 80’s mission holder meeting.
Reading you account of the gross financial irregulations occurring on parishoner accounts reminded me of story in the news about one of Madoff’s investors returning all money earned as a result of Madoff’s ponzi scheme. I couldn’t help thinking that DM (through his orders on Basics and IAS quotas) made Madoff look like a cub scout when it came to Ponzi schemes.
With so much force hitting the public, the charge has been astronomical.
Your story addresses so many areas of heavy charge that reading it alone has great value to any Scientologists. The fact that you have many comm lines makes this post an important one. I do agree that it takes a shoulder to shoulder effort but you have to admit that the correct opinion leader greases any communication line. I could imagine how quickly the flock would flee if the key opinion leaders each went public before the end of this year…it would be a counter force that would dissolve DM’s reign of terror INSTANTLY!
You and I have never met. I was out before your time.
While reading your story, I couldn’t help but marvel at how much personal power you had to draw on to maintain your own space and sanity. I realize that you weren’t always able to hold the line but you always came back to it. I admire you immensely. Welcome home.
For 37 years, until I found this blog, I couldn’t understand why many staff members who were giving their all, fiercely loyal and valuable, were being falsely declared and discarded. (myself and then husband included) I had huge and at times, overwhelming, charge on that. After reading everything I could, mainly this blog and some books, I realized that those of us that have been discarded in this way ARE valuable, able, loyal beings. That is precisely why we were and are attacked. It is not that our best efforts were and will never be enough. Trying to make sense out of an insane persons actions will only make you insane. If this helps anyone who might read this, I am glad. It has literally been a life changing cog for me.
Marsha Pearlman Sorensen
Yeh, those cut-rate factory rebuilds, so damn unreliable. Well, it’s understandable that while my incident was just the one for me but a long line of incidents for you and I’m sure you didn’t have me filed alphabetically or by date. But it was twenty-two years ago, 1988 to be exact!
I had a B of I, then a petition to the CS, then a petition to Sr. C/S FSO, then a petition to Sr. CS Int, then a petition to IJC, then another petition to the Sr. C/S again, more bribes, more waiting, ha, I just plain wore ’em out. Plus the exact LRH references I was operating on didn’t hurt my case any.
You were on the Reg post when I finished OT VII a year later. I went home after I was approved and audited full time for the whole year straight, finished and went to do VIII.
For me, Flag started getting real whacky in the mid-90’s, what with the enforced squirrel definition of FN and the robot GAT drills. The 100 hours of auditing I received after that was not only unnecessary but just plain didn’t work anymore. It seemed like the auditors’ ability to actually audit had mysteriously evaporated and they were now just pull-string dolls.
A question for you, Hy, at Flag do any staff ever discuss any of the outpoints related to DM, like the FN stuff, beatings, abuse, etc? Or is he generally considered a hero? Just curious.
Thanks for responding Hy. I was on the Excal then and I knew both Bob and Riggs very well. I liked Bob and always got along with him but I know he could create some wild effects on people. I was Cramming Officer and/or Corrections Officer and while the crew was often doing docking drills and what-not, I would patrol and often intervene to make sure crew didn’t lose their fingers or otherwise come to harm during these evolutions. Nobody told me to do it but I just took it upon myself. It was my own self-elected stat and is called Preventive Dianetics. I remember Bob yelling at top lung capacity at the First Mate, Stan Flowers. It was overdone. Flowers would talk to me about ultra top security clearances with the government. He could go on ad-infinitum. He was a nice guy who was more ship/mest oriented than tech oriented. Probably programmed on some level to spy on the CofS. After that, Stan concocted a leave and I was “forced” to sec check him in an hour before he could go on leave. It was ridiculous. His needle was clean and he left and never came back. Would have needed long duration sec checking to get anything. In the theta universe, Bob might have had a right target. You would have known me as Vince. Again…we were roommates for a short spell and I remember you telling me about seeing Ray Bradbury on an old rerun of Groucho’s quiz show. I’m in New York now.
Yeah Hy, that’s EXACTLY what I’m talking about. And I know you have tons of these stories of unselfish service.
It’s almost like you’re most alive when disagreeing with the “agreed upon” constraints.
Constraints be damned. Let service rule – and you did and still do.
It seemed to me that whenever executives began to order sec checks or even interface on the subject they virtually all dramatized their own out-Grade II. Grade II was the most out-grade there was. And it was often re-inforced by out-Grade IV. It was also my observation that Grades were not very popular which is….of course….out Grades. When I got to the Apollo, the first thing I noticed was that Scientology was not all that popular amonsgt the crew. Many had to be “forced” in session and they didn’t study. LRH ordered them all to do the PRD and that lasted for a few weeks. This was largely staff generated so it is no wonder that things degenerated to what we have not at INT. People have a tendency to invest more in their banks than in true Freedom.
Thanks for the suggestion, but I think I’ll stick to my posting on this blog. Everyone will find out on e way or another. Also I don’t really use FB much anymore.
Incredible reference MOQ!!
You be scary too. In fact, mere mortals and OT’s both shiver in your presence. But then they realize how damn nice you are and chill out..
One particular mean-looking bulldog reg in the IAS at Flag during the late 80’s-early 90’s, I think her name was Jessica (?) would snarl, “You make me sick” after failing to get me to pay at the end of her ‘briefing’ where she made sure I understood that I was of the lowest form of putrid shoe-scrapings and personally responsible for the destruction of Scientology and the wiping out of all mankind for not having coughed up more dough so the IAS could save us all from the ominous battalions of SPs dead set on our destruction.
I later on found out that her husband, also in the Sea Org at Flag, allegedly used to physically beat her. Hmmm…although I’m completely opposed to any form of spousal abuse and not an advocate of physical violence…I must confess I was not all that unhappy for her.
Now that you mention it, I recall a number of awkward comm cycles with Mitch Talevi regarding his mission and the demand for Basics sales. His mission is quite small and the income is not very high many weeks. For them if a public debits a Basics package from account that means that, say $ 3000 has to be taken out of current GI and put into the HCO Book Account. If you only make $ 5000 in a given week, that destroys your income. He was very guarded in these comm cycles and didn’t really want to get into voicing any “disagreements”, but they were clearly there in his apologetic attitude when he said things that amounted to “Don’t get me wrong. I know how important the Basics are” even after he mildly complained about how it was affecting his mission detrimentally. So, maybe some of those top FSM’s are close to being ready to take a stand as well and you may have a point there regarding the impact my post might have in some quarters. Thanks for bringing that up.
Man, that ‘roll-back’ thing is a thought-control mechanism if I ever saw one. I never saw a bulletin on “roll-back” technique, did you? Seems like a covert method of invalidating one’s observations of outpoints, if it involved anything critical of DM or his ‘church’.
David Miscavige is a criminal punk type disorder. He himself has very little if any true knowledge with which to actually better the lives of those around him, and in lieu of that fact he is always “too busy”. Is he even an auditor, case supervisor or at least Product IV or V? But, yet he is always talking, talking, talking, talking with his mouth like as if people have nothing else better to do with their lives than perceive that he is an illiterate moron.
Go figure. He should listen a little more and talk less.
Thanks, and thanks for the reference! Seems to me there might be another as well, one that specifically mentions taking positions of community leadership and such, but this will do!
I heard that Davey’s ultimate objective is to recruit the Sultan of Brunei, who could easily pay $5 billion per year personally to the Church of Dave. He could then eliminate everyone else.
Rumor has it that he’s also going to eliminate all unnecessary materials and actions in Scientology, such as: the Bridge. This will stream-line his activities per the Expanded Non-Existence Formula, which he has misunderstood as meaning that everyone else should be non-existent.
Well, that’s his long, long term plan, anyway. His short term plan before he actually does eliminate all other beings in the universe and after he gets his prime client, is to purchase the copyrights to the word, “Survive”.
His Scientology materials of the future will consist of that one word, so printing will no longer be so arduous for him. He will rent the word to his parishioner for proprietary use and he will call it, “OT XV Streamlined”.
The Sultan of Brunei will die from suppression and Davey will inherit the Sultan’s 1,788 room gold-plated mansion and 5,000 cars, his true, hidden objective.
Hy, your write up was tremendous. I look forward to reading more. Question for you: What kind of person is Debbie Cook? How come she has not spoken out as you have?
So nicely written. Thank you!
I always thought she was a great person of high integrity. From my little knowledge in dealing with her husband, as of a year ago, much of their business was coming from on-line Scientologists so they couldn’t endanger those connections. At least it was something he mentioned. That may have something to do with it but that is only my own speculation.
I’m sorry we never met but you sound like a wonderful and caring being. I hope one day we can meet.
Are you in any way related to Izhar Pearlman? He’s the only Pearlman I know of who was declared at one time. I don’t know the specifics though.
I agree that there is truth in what you say regarding opinion leaders going public. Marty and the gang doing the videos they did helped me tremendously. Without that I would never have taken it on myself to do this.
Let’s hope that this will all soon come to an end so we can have a new beginning. Ron’s way.
I feel so silly having to play hide and seek when there are so many wonderfully courageous people like you already out there. Just a while longer.
Another clue? OK. You were not my D of P or my Reg but there were 10 years of smiles whenever we crossed paths at the Sand Castle. I probably wasn’t unique in this but I was unique in another way.
Its good to see you nice folks out of scientology…
those of us who preceeded you carry scars and wounds to the bone that we carry proudly…the marks of our integrity…and the trees of our transcendence gained in no other way.
we were being actively murdered in the time frame you were still learning.
So now, here today… we stand… many of us apart, as it should be.
I am a little confused by your comment. I can’t tell if you’re upset that I only came out now, and not when you did, so I didn’t get as hard a time as you got.
If I am misreading you completely, please accept my apology for any misduplication on my part.
If you are upset about that, I guess the only thing I would add is that we should keep our eye on the correct target. No need to say more.
OK. I give up. That really doesn’t tell me much.
Guess I’ll have to wait until we all know who you are.
I look forward to that.
Thanks for the reminiscing. Your first name does ring a bell but I can’t quite place it. Maybe we’ll meet up one day and can really swap old war stories.
Nice to know you again.
I read this post immediately and though it was long, I was carried through the whole story. It summoned different tone levels. I can really attest to seeing that squirrel regging first hand, not at Flag but on PAC base. I got calls at 1am from MAA’s, I had hours “reclaimed” from my PC folder to be converted to cash for Basics. And I agreed to that to get the person regging me to go to sleep for the night.
I’m glad you got out! Welcome!!
Mike, You say it so well in “close to Chinese Communist group justice tactics for my taste” .
I have always contended that the 1.5 band and below of the tone scale is operating procedure with church of money management where you have Communism 1.1 and Fascism 1.5 at best .
J. – I’ll give you some filler on this when we speak next.
Hy, I don’t know Izhar Pearlman. In fact I’m surprised there is another Pearlman in COS besides Murray, Exilda, Jeff, Crissie and myself.
I hope we are able to meet one day too.
For goodness sakes Hy,
E-mail Marty.He’ll let you know. God forbid you don’t remember me.
Marty, it’s OK, tell him. but snuggle it in a blanket
Hy, I’m sorry for all the bullcrap you and all those wonderful people at the FSO and at Int and everywhere else have endured — the betrayal of LRH and his glorious technology. We never really knew each other that well, but at the infrequent but always welcome meetings you were always a shining thetan to me. Thank goodness you have seen the truth of what is going on and I know your voice will be a clarion call to others. I have to keep biting my tongue for a little while longer, but then, oh boy. but then…
Hy, thank you for sharing about Debbie Cook. I am disappointed in her for not coming out and speaking on Marty’s blog. My point of view is that Truth is senior to income considerations. Hy, you yourself re-entered the world of computers after many decades out and became successful with non-Scientology clients. Debbie Cook could do the same thing. Hy, you and others spoke out publicly because you realized that your silence served DM’s spirit-destroying greed machine. You put Truth ahead of your personal sense of security and faced the risks of speaking out. As a result of your actions as an OL, many people will gain the courage to leave CoS. I salute you for having the courage to speak out on Marty’s blog.
I hope to someday publicly salute Debbie Cook for speaking out. On the day that she speaks out many, many people will salute her and acknowledge her for doing what is required to help expose David Miscavige and the wretched inner circle of Degraded Beings that enable him to conduct his Reign of Terror.
Metaqual: You are an incredible spiritual being! I am amazed by your work.
Hy, if you were making 200 to 350 Gs a week regging at FSO, when you left, can you speak from your experience about who were the other large income making regs, and what where their ranges of weekly income, over their own careers that you firsthand can recall?
To me, as an old admin person, if I were asked WHY does Scientology STILL make so much money weekly, it is a LONG answer, and it mainly is an admin answer.
FSO income lines, the history of, would be a very important piece in Scientology history.
I have so many questions to ask, I’d love you to email me.
a) Do the FSO Regs use the INCOMM computer finance system, and how, in doing their jobs. (This will lead to a lot of questions itself. When I was the computer person for ASI, for instance, I wrote a program for the ASI regs that calculated for them info they could use in regging ASI’s public, and I wondered if at the FSO, had INCOMM done the same for you FSO regs, or if not, then HOW you used the finance and CF info to decide WHO to reg, etc, etc.)
I’d love for some ex top regs like yourself, to interview each other, like Marty and Mike are doing. Do some sit down short talks with each other about the reg business, the history, the details, the ups and downs, over the years, and fill out reg history of the FSO, on video.
Thanks SO MUCH for going public.
ex Sea Org (1975-2003) (FLB Dec 75 – Jun 83)
I can give you some info but think it would be boring numbers to most people. If you like you can email me and we can discuss it that way. Marty has my contact info.
Thanks for your kind words. I guess I’m just a fighter at heart and it was getting boring once I got above near-subsistence level financially.
I guess we all have a track and some parts of it weren’t very complimentary. We didn’t always speak out when we should have due to lack of courage and resolve. Maybe I really am finally doing my own set of “lower conditions” that never got handled doing Repair of Past Ethics Conditions. Actually, as I write this I am having a new realization about that and why I stayed “in” so long. I think I was trying to do then what I am actually doing now. Making a difference because I can. Suppression is not something new. But our handling of it can be.
I am not proud of allowing things I knew were wrong to occur within the Church and standing by doing nothing about them. I am working to change that now.
I’d better get down off my soap box now and get back to “work”.
I hear ya!!
I never saw any reference on roll-back, but that is how dm “rolls”. It must be covered in an “advice”.
Christian is indeed the nicest person that you can meet. It breaks my heart that he still there. He arrived at the FSO shortly after me – in 1990 or in 1991.
I remember that we regularly met on Thursdays on the roof of the Fort Harrison, when all the stats had been reported. We then simply talked freely about the past week, the production and the usual bullshit that was going in the organization.
I wonder what his state of mind is after being in this hell for 20 years.
He hasn’t called me for a long time so I don’t know what he thinks but he knows a lot. He had sold me the basics and congresses, actually sweet Nathalie did, but he collected the money. I had written a huge KR on Davey based on my own investigation and he was send to find out what else I knew. I’m sure he reported straight to Davey and for him it came down to SP’s messing up Davey’s work.
Sounds like we have a similar viewpointg about things. What’s life without a little excitement. The good kind I mean.
Here’s to a life filled with “dangerous” excitement that is fun!
I had forgotten that! I do remember that Richard had a young and shy French girl who was his Tech Page and her name was Valerie. You know, I still have dozens of those drawings I did for people at the FSO.
I’m really pleased that my website has been helpful, and video interviews.
I’m so glad you have discovered this new life where we’ve finally come full circle back to the rediscovery of personal integrity. It will be great to see you again.
So very nice of you to welcome me.
I remember the time you were at Flag and I feel badly about what happened. I also felt that way at the time as it seemed, although I didn’t know you and your track, that you were being given a hard time you didn’t deserve. I certainly rmemeber that you were not happy during that “auditing” and that alone was enough for me to know something was not right.
I really enjoyed talking to you today and hope we can stay in touch.
I hope things are going better for you now than they were then.
And many thanks for the warm welcome!
You’d be surprised.
For those of us who lived and died by the GI week after week, this kind of stuff wouldn’t be “boring” at all.
Living and dieing by the GI. An apt phrase. The LRH on that is that it is all the small actions of the staff added together that make up a big GI (can’t remember the name of the PL). If we had actually applied that for real, then when we had a rough GI week we would’ve done a full stat analysis and programmed out those areas that were not doing the proper actions to be gotten up to where they were. Then maybe we would have a lasting increase in GI.
I don’t really know the career totals for the reges. Let’s just say my income was average, and there were others who did more, especially Sonya, the #1 reg week after week (I only beat her a few times during my time on post).
As to the use of the INCOMM system, towards the end of my time on post the CF system was starting to be useful as a tool to locate who to reg. The use of CF, unfortunately was not always given the importance it should be. Growing an org by using CF is not an overnight activity. Yes it is the long term handling for any org. The problem is, when you have to make $ 10 G’s in the next 30 minutes, it isn’t always quite fast enough. And unfortunately that is how the reges were often run. Not always, but mostly. The GI was monitored very closely by the execs and when it didn’t move fast enough things were not so cheery.
In fact it was that method of managing the GI (on a minute by minute basis) along with the FSO’s use of “confirmed GI” (the only org I know of that uses this as an op basis) that fostered a lot of weird behavior. When I got an order to make 5 or 10 G’s in the next 5 minutes (not an exaggeration at times), where did they think I came up with it all of a sudden? While it is true that there were times when just by sheer intension I was able to really make money that quickly out of nowhere (and that DID happen), more often it was fabricated just to take the pressure off, figuring “I’ll make it later now that the pressure is off” and many times I would. But it was my solution to the intense demand for production at times. I am not proud of this, but I admit I did this. It is what made life hell when it was like that. Going around in fear that the money you confirmed wasn’t “coming in” and meanwhile withholding it from your seniors. Awful way to live. So even though I made huge amounts for the FSO, I only enjoyed it some of the time.
Hi Hy, I’m so very happy to hear from you. I’m glad you are well. I want you to know that despite the difficult times at the FSO I have great memories and I did learned a couple of good things from you which had an impact in my immediate life – I still use these today. Thank you. Cheers! Sergio (an ex Flag Chaplain)
Hey Sergio. It is great to hear from you. I hope things are going good for you.
I remember you very well. I also remember how well we worked together in handling various public.
I’m glad some things I did helped you. Thanks for being there.
Hello Sergio, good to see you here! THanks for making yourself known. I presume you are not in touch with Annie….
Hi Mike, I’m very happy to be here with all of you. I don’t know where Annie is. I wish I could see her.
Hi Marty, Things are great. Specially, reading your articles and watching your videos with MR regularly – keeps me sane and reminds me I’m not alone.
You may not remember me. I worked in the “computer project”. We generated the fully/partly paid lists while you were d of p.
I recall meeting you a few times and thinking that there was one hard working S O B and really admiring your attitude and strength.
Im glad that you are among the “indies” now.
32 Things Religion And The Bible Teach Us About Life These all pertain to “LIFE” – not a religious sector, belief or denomination.
All of these reflect about the spirituality of the India.
I found that this visualization worked best for me if I did it in
the dark, but you can try doing it with the lights on
and your eyes closed, or you can try wearing a sleep mask.