Labyrinth or Liberty?



My name is Joanna Cook, I am 25 years old. I grew up in Scientology, claimed it as my own when I was 16, joined the Sea Org shortly thereafter, found out I was unqualified, and worked from 16-24 trying to find my identity now that I could not be in the Sea Org. I volunteered with The Way To Happiness, the Volunteer Ministers, Criminon, a few OT Committees (OTCs), and finally worked for three years as a volunteer for Latin America or LATAM (defined as Mexico, Central America and South America) side-by-side with my mom, Mary Jo Leavitt [the LATAM IC], as her co-Stats IC, PR IC and, for one and a half years as the Compliance Reports IC, whereupon we (and the 9 OTCs across LATAM) worked in tandem to achieve the first – and as I understand it, only – “continent” in the world to complete the entire program! Because we didn’t make the OTCs fit the program, but rather validated what they were already doing right that fulfilled the purpose of the program, we obtained awesome, magical expansion and joy across the entire zone. It was the most beautiful experience I had ever had; I loved every person I worked with, and this ideal world promised in events seemed actually possible. But right at that high point, everything changed, and I went from being the most gung-ho person I knew (and one of the most gung-ho public as recognized by a huge stack of commendations) to a public utterly disaffected with Management.

So what the heck happened? Apparently, the OSA line to others is that my mom suddenly sprung a weird something-something and turned into a Suppressive Person (an “SP”, in the same class as Hitler) and corrupted me, too, which is so ridiculous that I was grateful for the people that disconnected from us, because they proved to have never been friends in the first place. Never mind that the Cont. Justice Chief told me my mother was not declared when I asked about it, yet I’ve been rumor-declared for failing to disconnect from my mom on a rumor. (That’s another story for another time.)

Actually, I had been disaffected momentarily here and there since 16, with my experiences in the EPF and various inconsistencies (between what things should have been and what they actually were) during my volunteering experiences. But every time I either wrote it up or brushed it off and assigned myself conditions, tried to figure out what I was failing to take responsibility for, etc. I thought maybe they were isolated incidences. I was also off for a year after some bad auditing, Clear-not-Clear, etc. But I “got over” all that.

In a nutshell, the straw that broke the camel’s back was my volunteer work with LATAM, because it proved these were not isolated incidences; I discovered that the people I was working with and loved got crushed because they refused to fundraise and simply wanted to disseminate, and this happened across an entire continent causing our zone to go from Power to Non-Existence in the space of a few months. After two years of trying to fix it internally, it just got worse. I was completely devastated that no one in Management actually gave a hoot about the people; they only wanted the money and the buildings. A series of situations (all covered in the reports of Mary Jo Leavitt) brought me to the conclusion that this was not the organization I signed up for, and I quit.

(note: those reports can be found at: )

It was painful, because it momentarily divorced me from a huge part of my identity and for a while I wasn’t sure how to exist without it, and yet it was totally awesome, because I was finally free from a very suppressive situation.

After my mom submitted her Knowledge Report online, the DSA that “visited” her showed us a reference that stated if anyone attacked Management, they were attackers of Scientology, since Scientology and Management were the same thing. Well, in that case, the same is true on the flip side – anything Management does that draws ill will or bad repute to itself also brings ill will and bad repute to Scientology. Yet when we bring these points up, we’re spreading enemy line.

And that’s one of the issues Management/Scientology is attacked for, publicly – inconsistency. They preach universal human rights and yet their staff doesn’t get to eat or sleep until they make their quota? They are the leaders in knowledge about the human spirit but they can’t make up their mind as to what the state of Clear is or not? How come people are broke or desperate or in any way imperfect if they have all the tools to solve every problem known to mankind?

The cruel part is that Scientology, as the organization stands now, is like living in a snow globe world. It’s supposed to be perfect, but it isn’t, and the world outside is supposed to be within our reach but it isn’t.

The “ideal scene” is always beyond reach, belonging to someone outside ourselves, and nothing we can do allows us to grasp it, even for a moment. We capture fragments, promises, of it, like snowflakes that melt in our hand.

The Church has these snow globe events that promise a utopian world if only everyone had Scientology, yet we have to give up our right to our own life in order to “Clear The Planet”. Has anyone ever given a concise and definite definition to what that means? I’ve had staff intimate it means we cross the threshold of theta versus entheta on a planet-wide scale, so that it means people’s entheta gets converted Poof! with a wave of awesome theta overtaking everything. And this is achieved solely through the IAS and library campaigns (not the actual Scientology services, but promises of future services) carried on the backs of broke parishioners. So basically, it means that Clearing the Planet is making sure everyone has an abundance of theta except us, yes? Wait. Huh?

Yet we must continue forward, because the fate of the entire sector of the universe rests on each one of our shoulders. If we fail now, we’ve doomed the entire race of humans, and all thetans everywhere (even though we don’t exist in space or time) now and forever, to the worst kind of misery imaginable. Our children will grow up in a cruel, bitter world devoid of any succor, so instead they should join the Sea Org and given to a life of “service”. But it’s okay, because they’re salvaging the universe.

And yet we can’t progress on the Bridge; instead of the glorious golden contraption leading us out of darkness to the rich and bountiful place of Total Freedom, we have a strange tangle of wooden planks and rope that becomes a labyrinth halfway across the chasm with a recurring return to this place called Clear. If we manage to escape out of the labyrinth, we’re struck by lightning before we can take the next step across, and if we survive that, we discover the world at the end is another snow globe – a place that is promised, supposed to be perfect, yet just out of our reach – that will only happen if the ones who finally escaped the labyrinth can convince everyone else to cross the chasm.

And no matter how much we take a sledge hammer to the glass of our snow globe, bang our heads against it, consult auditors and ethics officers and even chaplains to understand why the glass won’t crack, it’s indestructible. That world that is supposed to be ours can never be ours, and it’s all our own individual fault we can’t attain it, and because of our individual failure, we’ve screwed it up for everyone else. It’s premeditated, and designed to drive people insane. And yet it’s called Scientology.

People are in quite a conundrum. Here they are, in the middle of a chasm, and the world they’re trying to leave behind was awful – it had fears, insecurities, needless doubts and pain and hopelessness, and yet the price to attain the perfect world free of all that is creating a constant state of those things. Then, they’ve got their whole family or their children or someone they love entangled in this mess and they can’t move back without them, yet they can’t move forward, and they’re stuck in this labyrinth that is slowly eating them alive or sapping them of sanity, and the fact that they feel anything negative at all is entirely their fault, or the fault of strange beings or past incidences or otherworldly phenomena that can only be solved by moving forward.

Yet anytime they think it might be possible to actually move forward, there’s punishment in the shadows of their hope, and after a while they instinctively will hold themselves back from hoping, or from trying, and that again is cause for punishment.

In essence, the game where everyone wins is now the hell where everyone loses. Even the snow globe ideal orgs, in their perfect buildings with the perfect renovations, are built on musical chairs (swiping staff from other places), extortion, in locations that are unwise, or for orgs that were financially struggling to begin with, or based in countries under tyranny… they are supposed to be perfect, but something about them just isn’t. And people who are aware, who are supposed to be the public we seek, will know it, and instinctively they’ll stay away. Meanwhile, the org itself will be destroyed because the multiple policies protecting it have been utterly violated, and its destruction will be the fault of the public and the staff who were supposed to make it go right.

This organization that calls itself Scientology has made a premeditated effort to lock each dynamic into Scientology, at the exclusion of any other entity. For instance, the 8th dynamic is apparently only understood when you have a total grasp of the 7th, which you can’t fully understand until you’ve reached the top of the Bridge. The 6th dynamic (which is constantly at war with us) can only be conquered through Scientology. The 5th can only be salvaged from nuclear war if we Clear the Planet. We’re supposed to Clear the Planet even though “Wogs” can’t or won’t read (like they used to, they need video explanations now or they won’t get it), can’t understand basic ideas without studying 18 volumes and numerous lectures, are drug addicts, 1.1, and generally not to be trusted. Seriously, they are rather pitiful creatures when compared to us Homo Novises. They have case that sprouts off, they compare Scientology to all these other awful and weird practices, and psychiatrists everywhere have convinced them they need psychiatric drugs when all they need is Dianetics. (Plus O/Ws, Sec-Checking, donations, attendance at events, Evil purpose checks, oh we’re not supposed to mention that; Dianetics solves everything, per our patter when we do the stress tests.) And groups! My gosh, imagine trying to find a decent group outside of Scientology. What with all the people below 2.0 and faulty/inefficient technology, and ignorance on how to run a business or get along with others… so it’s better finding work and friends amongst people who understand, and can do proper admin scales, conditions, etc. Then there’s the family, which of course can only be whole and happy if Scientology is being applied. We have marriage counseling, life repair for the wayward kiddies, ethics officers standing by, and staff positions available so no one has to go to college to get a worthwhile job. Not that anyone would want to waste time with college anyway. Any friends, relatives, etc. not Scientologists are advised to become Scientologists as soon as possible. And as for the first dynamic, well, that’s not important in the scheme of things, is it? Necessity level demands we do what is the greatest good for the greatest number of dynamics, and only by consistently acting along those lines and acting as a 3.5+ on the Tone Scale can one ever have any real happiness at all.

Naturally, the greatest good for the greatest number of dynamics means what is best for the largest number of nameless faces that will benefit by our campaigns to Clear the Planet. Savings, what’s that? What’s the point in holding out for a rainy day when the fate of the world is in our hands right now? My Golly, don’t you know we’re already too late? The Big Man has his finger on the Big Red Button in this very instant, and the psyches are all but ready to take over government and all the schools, and only the IAS and the library campaign can save the day. You don’t see the connection, you say? Off with your head! I mean, over to Ethics for you.

So one day you’ve had enough, and decide you want to walk away, but you can’t. You have no choice. Exactly, it’s called Blackmail. If you leave, you lose your family, your work, your group, your only chance at salvation, your reputation, you’ve probably already lost your house, but worst of all, you lose your identity. This is who you are, now, and it’s everything you are, so it has to be okay. Things will work out. Ron promised it would in his When You Need Reassurance. So if we just hold out a little longer…

And one by one the things that were important, that made everything worthwhile, fade away, and we free-fall in our chasm, trapped in a fractured snow globe world that’s left us so we can’t reach at all; there’s nothing left to reach for. It’s the ultimate betrayal in the name of help, the one thing this wasn’t supposed to be, not this time. Some people could shatter upon this realization, and close themselves up into a tiny little box way deep inside themselves, and pretend that just because they’re still breathing it means they’re still alive; or they can go into a fit of rage; or they figure they can commit suicide; or they can walk away. Sometimes we go through shades of all these stages.

But the amazing thing is that there is a beautiful world out here waiting for us, and it isn’t separated by titanium bulletproof glass. Identities that are our own, dreams, goals, friendship, family, joy, teammanship, help, exquisite moments, are all possible and graspable and they can be yours. No scarcity. No strings attached.

It’s an interesting journey reclaiming life after it’s been molded into a shadow of what life can be, and after the shackles of what can or should exist are broken and cast aside. There’s a whole world full of awesome and friendly people, of fascinating philosophies and ideas, of life and nature experiences to be had, welcoming you with open arms — yet these things were only supposed to exist in the confines of Scientology… it has to be experienced to be believed.

For me, it makes the painful parts worth it, because at least – at last – the pain becomes transient, and the lying doesn’t have to be a necessary part of living, and prosperity, joy, unfettered existence, becomes real.

I can keep what for me is good about the philosophy, and use it as I want to, and when I want to, and my life is finally mine to live.

I want others to enjoy the gains I’ve had, and I can finally say that without the little voice in the back of my head saying, “Gains, sure, but would I want anyone to have the experience that I’ve had? No!” Being half-in and half-out is awful; I lived that for 18 months. True, I had less to lose than many still “in”: I never accepted the derogatory term “wog” and had lots of friends and family not in Scientology; my family all called it quits individually; I had no boyfriend, children, relatives in the S.O.; my job was secure; and even though things were hard for a while and there were growing pains after leaving, I would do it all again. All the painful experiences over the past year, summed up, still doesn’t come close to one week of being in that organization, not able to communicate openly, fruitlessly trying to fix things, ramming against that snow globe glass, trying to understand what was wrong with me that I couldn’t grasp. That was true pain.

I want all my friends, and my comrades, to be free of that. You deserve a beautiful, rich, full life. I hope you can hold it in your hands, and know that everyone you love can hold it, too.

Joanna Cook

181 responses to “Labyrinth or Liberty?

  1. martyrathbun09

    Now people can better understand why Mosey and I are especially fond of Joanna. What an extraordinary young woman.

  2. Joanna,

    You are beatiful and I love ya!!

  3. What a beautiful, brilliant, inspiring account of your story!
    You are the very embodiment of Gandhi’s classic saying, “My life IS my message.”



  4. Joanna, your words are achingly beautiful. The world outside the snow globe is that much better off now for having you in it. Welcome!


  5. Very powerful story. Thank you for sharing.

  6. Wow….wish I could put it in a bottle and sell it. I would call it “Vitamin I” for Integrity. 🙂

    Yes, for a group that is “supposed” to be creating a safe environment so that they can run out the “4D Engram”, they sure appear to be doing the exact OPPOSITE. Creating a huge 4D Engram…..

    Congratulations on your freedom!

  7. Dear Joanna,

    What a beautiful article. I have been out now for almost 2 years, yay! Reading your article brought me back through that experience and validated me and my decision, thank you so much for doing that. I would love it if every person still in the church could read it.

    love, g

  8. Wow! What a story. I can so understand what you are saying. And what a beautiful way of putting it. Thank you for sharing. You know. I can feel your gung ho through to my bones. And you know what. We will actually make it. Its just part of the process. LRH knew it would happen; he predicted that the church would be usurped. But the subject is free and it is on us now to use. Thetans of the world unite! Thank you for being a thethan.

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  10. Joanna what a story Thank you for sharing You sound a fine lady indeed.

  11. Poetry…

    May the world rest easy on your shoulders.


  12. Wow. Just “wow.” Welcome to true freedom.

  13. Joanna, did you just say you are 25. I predict a very successful life for you, considering where you’re at at 25.

    One incident that was a turning point for me was that the org had committed gross out-tech. I asked (in D of P interviews) for an R-factor from the CS to that effect. I was offered ARCX sessions galore – in other words I was supposed to take responsibility for their mistakes as if it was all in my head. Excuse me, is responsibility now a one-way-street? Finally after 12 years I was offered the R-factor I asked for. By then I had moved on and said that it was 11 year, 11 months and 30 days too late.

    What you went through with Clear/not Clear and your mother being dragged through the mud (and there was nothing you could do about it) was 100x worse. How you survived that with the positive attitude you have now is beyond me. You’re an amazing person.

  14. AnonymousPortugal

    Non-Scientologists often say that Scientologists who grew up in the Sea org are uneducated.

    Joanna isn’t uneducated at all. Hard to believe that Joanna is just 25 years old and can express herself like a university professor for literature. Or even better.

    LRH Study tech apparently does work despite that DM sucks.

  15. Wow. That about sums it all up right there!
    Joanna, your story is going to be a HUGE Acknowledgement, Affirmation, Breath of Fresh Air… for so many people.
    Congratulations to you for where you now ARE and where you are GOING.
    Very well done!

  16. martyrathbun09

    She didn’t grow up the Sea Org either.

  17. Alex Braverman


    Thank you for sharing your reality with the world. You so eloquently wrote what so many people need to read in order for their very lives to be freed from the trap of the evil snow globe.

    May you have lifetimes of happiness with your newfound freedom. May you prosper and attain great achievements with your wisdom, and may you always know the love of family and friends that understand YOU!

    Joanna, it is quite apparent from reading this that you are someone special. As time permits please write more of your insights, it is very important that the world within the snow globe has something to look for when their experiences and realizations tell them that something is just not right.

    In closing; Welcome to the real world! – where everyday is spent learning, loving and laughing. It is now yours, forevermore.

    And with that; Congratulations on your revelations! You have cast aside the chains that have bound – and have called them for what they were.


  18. Joanna,

    You have a beautiful way of expressing yourself, very passionate. I love it and what you communicated. You brought up so many important points but the one that stuck with me most was that LATAM was flourishing but got squashed because they wouldn’t fundraise and just wanted to disseminate Scientology.

    I hope everyone who has comm lines to those in LATAM are working furiously to let them know they can have what they want in the Independent field.

    I hope many people, especially the younger generation read what you have written.

  19. Really good grasp of the scene!
    Have a wonderful life, Joanna! And achieve what one spiritually can! 🙂

  20. Joanna – Beautiful. The truth. Love you – Amy

  21. Joanna,
    You have found quite a poise and integrity. You have grown into an amazing young woman and I have no doubt that you will continue to do so. I have always been proud to call you my friend.
    John Aaron

  22. Joanna,

    You are a very special person. Thank you for the truth. Love ya!

  23. Joanna

    WOWWW – You must write a book!!!!

  24. Beautiful, Joanna! Pure theta!

  25. Joanna,

    Delighted you are out, Keep storming the ramparts of life.


  26. Theo Sismanides

    Joanna, what a beautiful writing. I was so much into it, what you are saying about the 5th dynamic and the illiteracy, about the people on this Earth and the inefficient technology and what life is today and you bringing the light there once more, ONE MORE, who sees it like we do and we are together again. Nothing, nothing can separate theta, not even the strongest engrams because we are not of this world. You made my pain go, you gave me the right indication when you said to work with people who know and because they know they respect life and the dynamics and do the least harm to them. Thank you for stepping out and for making my pain less tonight with your beautiful, wise and powerful way to communicate. We will work together again, that’s for sure. And it’s gonna be better then. Thank you.

  27. DFB aka Dfb99

    Yeah, I totally get all of that. A lot of it I could have written.
    I’m still kind of struggling with it.
    IMO there is nothing worse you can do than take something that delivered what Scientoogy promised and alter and destroy it, thereby denying spiritual freedom to all who are attracted to it and trapping them in a “snowglobe”.

  28. Aw heck girl, now look at what you did. You went and made me cry. This must be what my girlfriend means when she says I’m just a big old softie inside 🙂

    I might post again later and say something coherent, but right now I need to work through some of that “help became betrayal” stuff. The environment is right for it tonight – a soft Joburg spring rain is falling, a cool breeze wafts in the door and out the window. Tomorrow the roses will be a blaze of colour, the moonflowers will open and all the dust will be gone from the Joburg air.

    This is all good, because that world outside my back door is real, it’s not inside a snow globe and I can reach out and touch it. So please excuse me while I go and do exactly that for a short while – touch the real world and just simply enjoy it and the small pleasures of talking to the people in it.


  29. Joanna. Wonderful. Thankyou. Your description is perfect, poetic and powerful. This IS Golden Scientology in the Age of Miscavige!

  30. Joanna, so nice to meet ya! 🙂
    Wow is about all I can say right now. So beautifully written, the truth. The more you accomplish, the harder it hits you, I think, when you whack smack into that glass wall and from what I’ve seen here, things have deteriorated drastically since 2000.
    I’m sooooooo glad you made it out with your sanity in tact. Hugssssss too!

  31. I can only echo the comments above; Joanna, you are a remarkable young lady if I may say so. Integrity, looks, eloquence, a wonderful family….where did it all go wrong? (George Best fans will get that joke)

  32. Impartial English Girl

    That’s a very brave and moving post. Good luck to you Joanna – you sound like a lovely person with lots of sense; I hope you have many wonderful years ahead of you. xx

  33. Dearest Joanna. And they said you were unqualified for the Sea Org? Seems to me if the Sea Org was made of people like you with true integrity the CoS would not be in the mess it is in now.
    Oh wait….anyone with integrity gets declared and ends up on this Board.
    Never mind!


  34. Joanna, beautifully expressed. Thank you. You have a beautiful future ahead of you. Love Carol

  35. Yes, my sister is an exceptional writer. 😀

    Shortly after leaving (almost exactly a year ago), my sister and I took a trip to New York. Saw all the sights, etc. It was an amazing breath of fresh air: looking at the amazing architecture, seeing the incredible mix of different cultures, watching plays on Broadway, etc…

    Experiencing so many brilliant and amazing parts of life that were designed, constructed, and built by NON-SCIENTOLOGISTS. May seem like a silly realization to have – but it hit me. It made me realize how much “life” I had been missing on, passing on traveling opportunities like this to be on course, go to the org, etc.

    At any rate, we regret nothing. It’s incredibly satisfying to live life freely, have friends without any strings attached, and experience everything life has to offer.

    I hope that anybody who grew up with me or my sister, if they happen to see this, contacts us. I have refrained from contacting old childhood friends because I know they do not desire the communication. They have been told a “story”, and it’s up to them if they want to ask us what happened. I will always leave the door open–the term “disconnection” is not in my vocabulary.

  36. Very well written Joanna.

    I had a cognition while reading your piece that the contradictions that exist in the Church of Scientology today are enough to create a nasty GPM!

    The organization has become what it has opposed.

    I guess you could now call it the Church of Psychiatry.

  37. Joanna,

    Thank you very much for having the courage to pIublicly express yourself.
    I fell a sens of hugeeeeeeeeeeeee dellusion and deception through your poetic way of expressing! I’m always concern for children in scientology , as they have been mindcontrolled and given beleifs to beleive – a bridge to nowhere to become their quest for freedom and hapiness and make to them this outside world fearfull and full of sp’s… A child raise in scientology have no other stable data to rely on…nothing…the person has to find her out- alone – and confront fear – sometimes – wothout any family left – all eaten by Church of scientology and their cult mind!

    If I am not wrong and you feel deeply this dellusion – I wish you just a bit of hope to find another scale of awareness and comfort within yourself – the true awareness – this space is untouch and it comes from your own knowledge as a spiritual being! You dont’t have to buy it nor to be geven it – you own it.

    Please, be happy, you are a great person and make these years a tremendous amount of life experience that you will cary on to serve you – as you would never- in you futur life -accept any guru, master or commander or order.
    You can decide yourself for your own life, own ethics, own freedom – You have much more awareness than lots of people – and yopur are a sain and intelligent person. Please keep relying on your own judgement without need of any acknowledgement from others! Be your only advisor.

    I assure you, that the fact that you probably have been told that you are denying yourself your bridge and your total freedom is a Snow Globe – it relies on fear..your freedom has nothing to do with going up a bridge draw on a poster…your freedom already exist within yoursel, within this space where your mental is quiet , between to greath, calm, without any fear that the church is implanting into peopls’s mind! Be happy and find your space of freedom that you are already found the route!

    Good luck – may this be the beginning of a real true new adventure – that will make it now possible to feel blessed with live, confidence, and happiness!

  38. Joanna,
    you describe the madness as it is.

    It reads like a script for a tv sitcom.

    Or like a GPM line plot.

    Great that you conquered that ugly stuff 🙂

  39. You can credit Joanna’s own native intelligence and profound curiosity, as well as her amazing mother’s efforts and creativity, for that education! Right, Joanna? : )


  40. Joanna, Beautiful dissertation of the true reality of the Scientology Church we used to know and love. My hat is off to you, one so young in body and yet so old in spirit. Here’s an excerpt from LRH from Knowledge is Truth: “There’s the knowledge itself. And if anything was clean and pure and applicable in its raw state, Scientology is, just as Dianetics is. I can only caution you against applying this badly. I can only let my imagination show you some of the things that might occur if some of the basic elements were not watched carefully. But I can’t blind you to the fact(and have no intentions to do so) that it exists as a body of knowledge. I dug it up and there it is. And your own conscience, your own beingness, is really your only guide to your use and application of it/ It exists as it is. And then it exists also as I interpret it.’
    ‘Now when I slant it, you will find my slants form up just like this. One, play it on the good side, Use it reasonably to get Man over the humps. Use it to straighten out the dynamics. Try not to aggrandize(to make greater in importance, power, rank, etc) yourself, because you know it. Try not to profit widely by it and be very humble about giving it to people. I’m telling you where opinion stops and truth starts. The knowledge itself is truth. As I talk to you about it and as I try to teach you about it, you will find that it is slanted in the direction which I have mentioned it to you.” – LRH
    Joanna, you have the gift of knowing and being able to observe correctly exactly what is in front of you. Probably because you come from good stock! hahaha But really you are totally correct that you are not qualified to degrade yourself with involvement in the present Sea Org. The Sea Org that LRH founded in the late 60s became a goodwill activity and an efficient administrative arm of Scientology. Very unlike that entity that calls itself the “Sea Org” today. The Sea Org is supposed to be that organization which operates at a high level of confront and standard. Very different from the example we see today. Its purpose was to get ethics in on the planet and eventually the universe. How can it accomplish this purpose when there is a court jester masquerading as the supreme commander of the Sea Org and the Church of Scientology.
    Per Flag Order(the LRH policy of the Sea Org) 508, the Sea Org operates with a fleet of ships dedicated to this purpose around the world. Being mobile and separate from the pull of land is an absolute necessity to accomplish its plans, missions and purpose: to get ethics in.
    How can we expect a landlubber who is masquerading as a Captain who has never been at sea and who would slobber all over himself after the first 24 hours, much less never be able to go aloft and work the rigging.
    We all know that the Dwarf is just a pawn in the grand scheme of things and one day when he thinks all is safe and that he can just sneak away, someone who is knowing like yourself, Marty, Mike, Mary-Jo and many others will be there to receive him and put him in his proper place and condition.
    Hey we can say bunches of bad things about DM and what he deserves for the atrocities he has committed since his inception in the early 80s. But then we would be failing to apply Standard LRH. It is our job as Scientologists to make sure that we Standardly apply the Danger Condition to the S.O. and get ethics in if they are not going to. We have to start at the top and work our way down. We can always have DM apply the conditions while he’s in jail as part of his indictment. And then do the same with the other frauds who have masqueraded as Sea Org members. The “OSA”, the “IAS” regges who are unknowingly committing fraud every day in the guise of “clearing the planet. These guys are accomplices of a criminal “executive” and they are just as guilty for not coming clean before this. It’s no wonder they slink around dragging their overts and withholds into every reg cycle looking like they have mice hanging out of their mouths and they think no one can see it. Well, most can’t and don’t all the way to the poor house.
    Joanna, you are one of the true new warriors, as Karen #1 would say and you are to be admired. But this is only TR2 1/2. Don’t stop there, keep going, as we know you will.

  41. Scott Campbell


    Now that’s the kind of wide-ranging, comprehensive and freewheeling rant I can really appreciate! WOW.

    To me, it points up the dangers of isolating oneself into an insular group that only serves itself. The fact that you spotted this disconnect between the propaganda and the reality speaks volumes to your intelligence and ability to confront.

    Thank you for looking at the C of S from an exterior viewpoint and reporting what you see! It has really helped me.


  42. Joanna, what a BRILLIANT piece of work. Thank you for sharing that with us.

  43. Bravo Joanne.
    What a super essay.
    It is particularly moving for me that they do not always win when they try to interfere with parent/child relationship.

    I wondered what the outcome was on your mother.
    Many Bright Blessings !

  44. Joanna,


  45. “I guess you could now call it the Church of Psychiatry.”


  46. Joanna

    Yes, yes, yes and yes. You have hit so many important points, and you paint the entire picture in masterful strokes. No matter what our individual experiences have been in scientology and no matter where we find ourselves now, we have all felt what you beautifully describe here.

    Your image of the snow globe is so apt – I remember gazing into one as a small child, fascinated by the perfect miniature world within and pretending I was inside it, the eternal snow whirling and falling around me, never melting, never dirty… But it’s such an artificial and lifeless world in there. And MUCH too small for the likes of us, eh, Joanna?

    This is a beautiful and moving piece, Joanna. Please keep writing!

    love and kisses


  47. Joanna
    The fact that you weren’t qualified for DMs brand of the Sea Organization is no real loss eh?
    I will be proud to stand beside you as a fellow Sea Org Member and raise a salute to Ron when we have finished freeing our friends from that beautiful but deadly glass prison.
    Love and hugs to you and your family.
    Mary Jo – you must be so proud. If my daughter had authored something like this I would be crying buckets 😉

  48. Theo Sismanides

    Hahaha, that made me laugh. thanks

  49. Beautiful! You are some story-teller! (That’s admiration–a story doesn’t have to be fabricated to be worthy of telling in a poetic/literate way.)
    My regards, M6

  50. Joanna, thanks for that wonderful contribution.
    Your “snow globe” depiction is accurate, powerful and helpful.
    It will have a long shelf life in the tool box of truisms needed to wake up a lot of folks.
    Best wishes to you and your family.

  51. And Splog, you’ve got a nice way of putting the picture there too. I can smell the roses! M6

  52. Gawd…me too!

  53. I can call it any damn thing I want CD.

    Besides one of the stated goals of Psychiatry is to make the individual more tractable by manipulation and control.

    A goal that was obviously portrayed in institutional psychiatry’s participation in Mk Ultra.

    Also in their more recent support of “enhanced interrogation techniques” more suitably known as torture.

    It is also obvious that you lack an understanding of what the GPM consists of which are synthetic personalities that the individual once opposed yet eventually goes into the valance of due to their effort to resist.

    But anyway CD I’d just like to say f*ck you very much for your invalidation and evaluation and I hope that you accept it in the spirit it was given.

  54. Joanna; You should become a writer.

    This is one hell of a piece.

    It captures it beautifully – a classic.

    And; Miss you 🙂

    Let’s talk again some day in the not too distant future.

  55. Seconded.

    Heh heh snowglobe

  56. Now THAT is interesting…

  57. Greg,
    It was really awesome to meet Joanna and you recently. Joanna’s article really floored me with it’s insight and precision. I knew you two were very bright and nice people from our conversations. You guys are a totally great family! MJ rocks and did a great job with her kids.

  58. Joanna,

    I think that this article will help a lot of fence-sitters!

    You write in such a way that anyone can duplicate without having to have extensive tech knowledge or management structure training.

    Boy is that an honest, in-depth look. Wow! Really…… Wow!

    I was in for twenty years. I’ve been out for fifteen months. During that short amount of freedom from the grasp of Miscavige, I’ve experienced/observed practically everything you describe so very, very well here.

    I’d like to think that LRH’s target for a cleared planet was sincere, originally.
    I can guarantee that as it’s used today, it’s a total trap. A failed purpose for one and all to be held over our heads as leverage for our time and our money.

    All together now…….”I see DM in an orange prison uniform in present time!”

    Thanks Joanna!

  59. A joy to read. A truly heartfelt and eloquent rendering of experiences within that group. I beleive this is one of the best posts like this I have read.

    Joanna, you have a marvelous gift of expression.

  60. I came to this type of understanding about 25 years ago. I beleive the very things which are necessary – to keep people in Scientology are the problem. Unfortunately they have to exist and are written into the fabric of the church. The data of life understanding and problem solving should be taken and used wuthout the ‘must-have’ on the people who are brought through the door – give it and let the person go away and improve life. I also found that this philosophy has been in existence for aeons. My cousin knows much of it and has studied other wisdoms. Read the essays of Elbert Hubbard and the Tone Scale and organixational policy is defined – he was a famoun=s ‘guru’ with thoudands of follosers in his day (available on

  61. I’m OG, from the Sysadmin side of the a.r.s. rmgroup attack in the early nineties, and a grand total of two people on this planet have ever asked why I was in this struggle. I gave each a different answer.

    The first was Keith Henson, early in my involvement. I told him that I saw Corporate Scientology behaving like the proverbial bull in the china shop, attacking a mode of communications barely out of the incubator, a mode of communications that held the promise to truly revolutionize Humanity – and that stuck me as fundamentally wrong.

    The second was a gentleman who I cannot name. The day before, I had made the trip to Gold to meet some other OG and see the place with my own two eyes. That evening, while visiting with Ida Camburn, we got word that a brawl had broken out in the street in Clearwater when Bob Minton was jumped on the sidewalk. It was mentioned that Graham Berry was plannng to picket Blue the next day, and I considered the possibility that emotions may still be heated. I decided on the way home to take a camcorder and keep it on Graham, if not to deter another incident, to at least document it.

    And I didn’t have an answer for that gentleman at the time. Only after much reflection did I realize that, for whatever reason, I felt a personal obligation to do what I could to clean up the mess that is CST/RTC/et all.

    Now, more than a decade later, I realize that what needed to change was people (and *that* only took eight years after slipping through the drainplug of my own snowglobe, so to speak). And today I see that change (for the better) gaining traction and poised to sweep anyone and everyone left inside that will allow themselves to be brought to Reason and Reasonableness.

    VWD, dear, you’ve made my day. 🙂

    I will wrap with this: I worked up a red and black agitprop of Neda during the events in Iran a year and a half ago, put it out there, and really never heard anything about it again. Then, while watching an HBO documentary on the matter a few months ago, I caught a glimpse of it – it stood out starkly in that sea of green, and it conveyed that sense of confront that I was seeking. It made it through the noise and tyrants, and landed squarely in the hands of the people after all.

    Never allow yourself to believe that you aren’t making a difference.

  62. Wow! That was some piercing, powerful prose. Joanna, this post will have an important impact in at least two ways. First, your words will inspire others who are just coming to realize they are in the labyrinth, and wondering what to do. Your story may make it easier for them or it may not, but it will motivate them and that’s what counts.

    Second, most of us posting on this blog have gone through our own version of escaping from the Snow Globe. The eloquent expression of your experience resonates with each of us, and in my case at least, brings into focus some thoughts and feelings that I had not fully articulated.

    You have a gift, and one that should be shared with the world.

  63. Dominic, I’ve been trying to remember which LRH Congress it was where he predicted the church would be usurped. It may have been the State of Man, but not sure. Do you have the exact reference? If so, could you post it here please.

  64. Dear Joanna,

    Your articulation of your perception and viewpoint of the existing Church of Scientology will go down through the annals of history as a high point. I consider this writing to be a monumental enunciation of emancipation.

    Thank you for forwarding your thoughts with certainty and such clarity.
    It’s good people like you who actually make this a better world and that means, of course, better universes.

    Thanks for all you’ve done and continue to do. You are a stellar example of a real Scientologist. You create understanding. And understanding is based on truth. And, by the way, I love your metaphors.

    ML, Tom Gallagher

  65. Thank you for writing this, Joanna. So well said and exactly so. I just wish I knew how to get your story to those still inside the snow globe.

  66. So eloquent … so theta …

    Yes Joanna, yes yes yes … You can keep what for you is good about the philosophy, and use it as you want to, and when you want to, and your life is finally yours to live 🙂

  67. I can’t remember when I read anything as beautifully written as that. Joanna – you ought to write! ou have an incredible gift!

  68. Floating Needle

    “I want others to enjoy the gains I’ve had, and I can finally say that without the little voice in the back of my head saying, “Gains, sure, but would I want anyone to have the experience that I’ve had? No!”

    That pretty much sums up the current situation!

    Nice writing style Joanna! Thank you for sharing.

  69. Agreed. But, why was she not eligible to join the Sea Org but qualified for everything else?

  70. Hi Joanna, I must commend you on your vivid description of what Scientology should be and instead what is has been twisted into by the hypnotic trance the group has subjected itself to.

    I would like to share with you an excerpt from an article by a pioneer Independent Scientologist named Steve Bisbey written 1984.
    This article in my view shows as we free ourselves from the DM Machine Web of Deceit that we must continue to train and become auditors to ensure out personal freedom and be able to help in the best we we can

    This excerpt below is from

    The 2nd PDF listed in the Reconnection section of this great site from original Independents

    Start of Quote
    “The Pcs and Pre OTs on Org lines are not themselves in a position to get goodcase gain – unless they are angels in which case they wouldn’t need it.
    Why? Case Data has been used in Ethics and Justice actions and been disseminated abroad despite LRH Policy to the contrary. Threats of denial of the bridge have been used have been usedto control people.
    These things would tend to make a Pc or Pre OT withhold. If only his connections or opinions.

    To the degree a Pc or Pre OT is withholding he he will not get case gain. (Ref the Basic Auditing Series and many other LRH issues.)
    “That person who has most evaluated for the individual is that person whose
    viewpoint the individual is liable to have. We used to call this valence shifting.

    We can still call it that but it’s actually an enforcement of viewpoint.” LRH
    (The Tech Dictionary definition of Evaluation No. 4 is ‘The shifting of viewpoints or’ the effort to do so.”)

    ”When a person is out of valence he does not easily As-is his bank.” HCOB 2 Aug 69.

    Thus even when he gets into session in the Org a Pc or Pre OT made withholdy, and slightly out of valence, now has a reduced chance of making the full gains available in auditing.

    We have none of the above disadvantages in the field. A Pc or Pre OT can be himself, he can get off O\Ws without being vilified or gossipped about, he is not evaluated for, his bridge is not used to control him, he is not manhandled in Ethics if he complains, and all of LRH’s Tech including Ethics and Justice is used, as it was intended, to improve conditions to the best of our ability.

    Some of the comments above may be construed as an attack on the Org, they are not intended to be.
    The only legitimate target for any attack is the RTC who were and are 3rd partying the Org and the field.
    We are only concerned with delivering LRH technology, the handling of RTC we leave to others.

    Love, Steve Bisbey. In 1984″
    End of Quote

    I wanted to give credit to the author and also share what I consider is a very precious viewpoint .

  71. Tony DePhillips

    Hi Joanna,
    I haven’t read your whole article yet, but I love what I have read. You clearly express the madness about the “ORGS” and how convoluted the whole trap is. Thanks you for what you have done in the past and thanks now for maintaining your integrity and standing up for what is right.

  72. Joanna, congrats for breaking out of DMs insidious trap!

    What a precise and rich description of the suppressive actions employed by Co$ in pursuit of its evil purposes. When reading through your experience, I’m reminded more and more of the system from 1984, and even that book begin to pale in comparison.

    DM wants unaware, other determined slaves as followers, but your rendition of the situation is such a beautiful piece of truth and heightened awareness that it by itself surely will catalyze other breaks!

  73. martyrathbun09

    In the future please be more careful with punctuation so it is clear whom you are quoting throughout, where one starts and ends off. Don’t want to have to bounce something you put so much work into.

  74. I have a question, but it’s a little off-topic:

    When LRH wrote “‘Being reasonable’ is the chief offender” in HCO PL 18 May 1970 Data Series 7 Familiarity, my impression is that his meaning and intent in using the phrase “being reasonable” in 1970 was what, in contemporary parlance, would be called “Being an enabler”.

    Am I on target?

  75. Baby Jo…I jumped when I saw your beautiful face on my screen, looking out with that gorgeous smile and that slightly devilish humor behind it I know so well.

    An eloquently written essay on your experience you’ve presented here, expressed in a way that is distinctly “our Joanna”. Yup, a writer you definitely are.

    My heart sings to know that you have finally come back to the magnificent you of YOU. Only the best of life is ahead of you darlin’

    Love you to pieces,

  76. Dear Joanna,
    Thank you for taking me so brilliantly through your journey.
    I’ve not heard it put in quite the same way previously.
    I found it particularly interesting when you referred to the current church of “premeditation” in their destruction of Scientology.
    As the majority of posters have already expressed, you are one talented writer. I think you could write your own ticket in that field and any others that you might want to explore. I look forward to more of your writings in the future.
    Marsha Pearlman Sorensen

  77. What a beautiful uplifting letter. I’m on the way to being “declared” because I won’t disconnect from my grandaughter and daughter. Am seventy years old and loving being home now and not feel responsible for the whole planet.

  78. Joanne, that was a very insightful and touching post. In addition to possessing an extensive and “colorful” history as a 32-year Scientology veteran (including a number of years as a staff member holding various Tech and Qual posts including Snr. C/S), I am a university trained scientist and own my own consulting business. Even with my experiential background and education, I don’t think I could come close to the way you described the current state of church management or captured the essence of the gut-wrenching existential crisis that fully indoctrinated Scientologists must endure when they finally swallow Morpheus’s red pill.

    Perhaps it’s partially a paternal reaction since I have daughters your age, but I feel personally proud of what you have accomplished, the way you handled the situation while keeping your personal integrity and enthusiasm intact, your insight, and your obvious ability to touch and inspire others; hell, you even got a crusty, beaten down (but dashingly handsome 😉 old cynic like ME to post!

  79. So, who is that marta with a small “m”? I’d like to get to know you. Email me:

  80. Very nicely said, Joanna. Impressed I am, with your writing!

  81. Kathy Braceland

    Joanna, you sweetheart you. This is beautiful…all heart and soul. Wow. I am so lucky and thankful to have you in my life. I love you to pieces!!!!

  82. Dear Sam, I am beyond proud!! Joanna has been writing since she was 11 and I am Number One Fan of hers, in many ways! I am also so happy each one of my kids has clarity of mind and heart and has taken this difficult experience full circle to a win, to a place where they feel peace. It was so hard to be a parent that raised kids in this culture and environment with all the best intentions to only later realize we were in a trap — yet each one had to figure it out independently. I am blessed to have two very bright and big-hearted beings as my children, and we have always been a team. That has proven to be the most key element in how we have experienced and lived the different challenges, joys, difficulties and sorrows along the way. I owe so much to my kids– Having them in my life is the reason for many good things I have become, have done and continue to do, and have.
    Mary Jo

  83. Thanks for a wonderful and amazing post.

  84. Joanna, beautifully written, beautifully stated. You have a way with words. What a moving statement of the conundrums and contradictions that any Scientologist faces when trying to leave the Church. Keep writing, my friend.

  85. Indeed, wow! I thought I was going to lose my sanity just reading about it!

    I think you must have cpatured the essence of the experience there. Well done.

    Thank you, and, yes, good to meet you. I’m sure glad you’re on our side!

  86. You know what I love about this place? We all love each other, but then slap each other silly occasionally. Ahh, life!

  87. AnonymousPortugal

    Are you saying that study tech doesn’t work, Lunamoth?
    It worked for me. I make nice cash by applying LRH study tech. Took me and others a lot longer grasping difficult subjects without study tech.

  88. RJ, a suggestion which I hope you find helpful. You may find more support in the wider community for your views about psychiatrists if you give specifics and support your contentions with evidence.

    eg. “Besides one of the stated goals of Psychiatry is to make the individual more tractable by manipulation and control.”

    Psychiatry is a field of knowledge and medical practice. A field of knowledge and medical practice doesn’t have goals. People have goals. So, instead of using the generality “Psychiatry”, I suggest you list the names of psychiatrists who have that stated goal. I concede that the list would have to be a very long one if you were to avoid generalising about a whole profession based on the views of a few, so you it would be even more effective if you could list the names of organisations comprised of psychiatrists which have that stated goal to make the individual more tractable by manipulation and control.

    Of course, links to evidence of these statements would be necessary too.

  89. Good for you, Edie. You’ve got your priorities straight. Keep enjoying life!

  90. Joanna, your friends are blessed to have you in their lives. I hope they realise it. If you share your heart with them even a fraction as beautifully as you did here, they will be helped to see that life outside the snow globe is indeed wonderful and not to be feared. ❤

  91. I wish I could write to everyone tonight, but I’ll have to offer a blanket heartfelt Thank You to everyone who has written me. I appreciate so much your support, kindness, and beautiful way of expression. Anyone reading this can get an idea of the community that awaits them — imagine that four “best friends” shun you, and fifty strangers welcome you with open arms, in appreciation of exactly who you are. I hope others can feel the way I feel sharing my experiences and receiving this kind of reception. >Hug< to each one. (And I am a professional writer, I must admit, and a professional editor, but I had help from my mom and Ivan, thanks to them.) I sure want to write more, in general and on this subject, in the future. Love, Joanna

  92. Thank you so much Marty! I sincerely appreciate you holding open this forum so we can share our experiences. I am excited for people who will take advantage of it for the future. Lots of love, Joanna

  93. Good question. I never asked. 🙂 I had a beautiful realization a few months ago that even if I had had a time machine, I wouldn’t have changed a single moment of my experiences, because every step was necessary for the next part in my journey, and it all led me to where I am today, which is an awesome place to be, and I’ve met so many great people through my volunteer efforts, and since coming out, that it was exactly as it needed to be. As my brother later mentioned, I regret nothing. I regretted a lot for over a decade, but as my motto goes – everything that happens to me turns out to be the best thing that ever happened, even if it takes years for me to figure out how. I’m just glad I finally saw how it all came together and now life holds a lot of promise, so I’m pretty happy (though not all the time, that would be boring.) 🙂

  94. Eddie – that is a good synonym. More precisely, being “reasonable” means explaining away things that are wrong or evil because “he had a bad childhood,” or “well, we always have trouble when the moon is full.” The product of reasonableness is that the person becomes an enabler for the person doing wrong.

  95. ΘTater/GaryLerner

    Joanna, I am wonderfully amazed at how so very well you communicate.

    Your truth really rings for all of us and thank you for being YOU!

    An ARTIST with words! 🙂

    Love and ARC,

    P.S. Joanna for President!!! 😉 (you just never know… 🙂 )

  96. Redneck Janette From Detriot

    This is very well written, I enjoyed your viewpoint very much! It is true, there are so many wonderful, honest, caring and helpful people in this world. That’s part of what makes current Scientology a cult, it’s a mind F*%! and we all bought into it to a greater or lesser degree. We kind of sheltered ourselves from the “real world” and thought we had all the answers. The kids being raised in Scn, and being taught to believe in certain things or think a certain is what really pisses me off. I never was fully “In” myself, the last 20 years I’ve had one foot in and one foot out because of all the outpoints I witnessed, so I never ever pushed Scn on my kid, fine do a couple courses here and there but believe what you want and when the reg’s started coming after her, well they were in for a rude awakening, cause they were not going to talk to her at all!! There are too many kids and now early adults that just do not know how to think for themselves, they have turned into robots and no desire to do or be anything other than a staff member or sea org member and their parents just praise them up .. it’s very sad!
    Thanks for posting, I enjoyed the read!

  97. Well stated, Lunamoth! You got it! 🙂

    (Thanks, Marty, for clearing that up.)

  98. Extremely well written, Joanna. You captured the conundrum very, very well. How could a group dedicated to freeing beings become the exact opposite? I found myself smiling at how well you put this together. Wow. You nailed it.

    I could not help thinking that you were born about the time I graduated the BC and I was your age at the time. Your entire life was post my highest accomplishment in the Church. I don’t know what that means, except to say that you and I grew up in two different churches. At the time you were born, the stake was being driven into the Church’s heart. To me, that you did so well with the subject shows your innate strength, the strength of your family, and the strength of the subject. You were able to pull off some amazing stuff despite the intentions and actions of the poisoned leadership. I am glad you wrote this, and I look forward to meeting you some day.

  99. Joanna, hope you don’t grow tired of yet another fan mail.

    The way you communicate your experience and sharp observations inevitably reminds me of the definition of ART as in “Quality of Communication”. Wonderfully stated. Truly gifted. BUT, you don’t just express something skillfully, you actually have something of value to say and you do it so well that it resonates in the reader, paints a vivid picture in all the colors of life, from the muddy dark to the bright sparkle.

    I, for one, can attest to what your mom said in a reply above. Us parents learn and gain and grow because of you wonderful kids (who we still love to call “kids” even though we well know you no longer are). You have stuck with us through so much thick and thin in what we once believed to be the best possible way out before we realized it was a very dark dead-end alley.

    So much ability and beauty unfolds in front of our very eyes that it can make us weep – with sadness or joy – and for every “kid” stepping outside that snow glass world it has so carefully been lead into, I believe the joy and proudness felt by the real parents does resonate with every parent similarly situated. It certainly does with me.

    Wishing you lots of real snow flakes.

    Love, Samuel

  100. Bravo Joanna,
    Wonderful post!
    Is there a way for me to contact you personally?

  101. Thanks, Joanna, for highlighting a very important perspective, with humor, eloquence and a clear head.

    I never stop marveling at the irony of Scientology as “The Bridge to Total Freedom,” when the truth is that those entangled in the Church become less free and more controlled the further up the bridge they go. And Scientology has made an art out of using freedom of religion and the International Declaration of Human Rights as shields to hide behind. When the reality is that nothing there is free and human rights are at the bottom of a very long list of priorities, with money, real estate, and good PR taking the top spots.

    If we are to truly be free, it is important to be wary of anyone (or any organization) promising freedom, but delivering shackles instead. Anyone considering joining such an organization or anyone considering leaving one, should ask the following questions:

    1) If a belief system, religion, or life philosophy can’t hold up to questions, debate, dissent, or differences of opinion, how could it possibly be strong enough to base your life upon? Furthermore, why would you want to base your life upon a system that requires the use of lies and deceptive tactics to remain viable?

    2) Why would a legitimate organization need to create an environment of fear, where upon leaving one is threatened not only with losing friends, family, and the life known before, but with losing any hope of a productive and happy life, along with any hope for an eternity?

    3) In a world that is so complicated, isn’t it illogical to think that there is only one right answer, a single path to achieving the best out of life? Doesn’t it make more sense that there is more than one way to achieve happiness, fulfillment and satisfaction?

    I know I’m preaching to the converted here, so to speak, but I feel that sometimes the most obvious things need to be repeated plainly.

  102. Eddie,

    Yeah, that’s pretty much on target. An enabler has to do some mental contortions first. They need some distorted conclusions they can use to justify what they are enabling.

    All these folks that give up their life savings and integrity because “DM said so” are “being reasonable”. A protestor who protested because they genuinely felt something was badly wrong in the Lisa saga, and won’t stand for it, is not “being reasonable”. A defining characteristic for me is that to be reasonable you have to cave in, go into agreement with something, and make some crazy leaps of logic to do it.

  103. Wonderful declaration Janne and a true piece of art… You are talented!!

    Thank you!!

  104. There’s quite a difference in slapping each other and slapping an avowed paid pharma bot with the sole purpose of stopping and invalidating anyone and anything disagreeing with psychiatry or their chemical population control agenda.

  105. Jettero Heller

    Joanna, you reach my “candle in the wind” making it a “roaring fire”.
    Thanks for helping LRH and your priceless contribute to achieve the Scn Goals.
    How do I give back to you alla that AMOUNT of theta…..:
    You may count on me and mine armies.

  106. Joanna – what a beautiful balance of emotion, metaphor and fact. It communicates perfectly what so many of us have felt but have been unable or unwilling to articulate.

    The “must have – can’t have” that you describe being pushed through the dynamics – enforced by unjust, punishing “ethics” (not “ethics” at all, only [in]justice) – has become entirely repulsive to a sane mind.

    It is truly amazing how those many “buttons” (clear the planet, etc.) create a literal straitjacket that can hold by use of the individual’s own noble intentions. A hold that is strengthened, firstly, by painting any other intention as ignoble, and, secondly, by using “ethics” (extortion and blackmail) to weaken the resolve of the individual.

    The real power, though, has been to keep each person individuated from the others by making it an overt to discuss the many outpoints that can be sensed, if not outwardly seen. Add to that the fear that even if you think you have the confidence of someone – and raise an outpoint – you may find yourself betrayed (KR’d) by that “friend”. The result? A perfect Reverse Scientology “no-communication” formula.

    The power of the “church” has been to supress and sunder comm lines, keeping the individual weak, unsure, and in line. By keeping communications cut another “reality” can be enforced; the snow globe becomes “truth”.

    Your communication, your beautiful message, will be passed around. It will help some to see that realities have been enforced on them and will give some the strength to realize they can leave the snow globe. Some, a few. But each time that happens another crack is created in the wall of that snowglobe and it will become weaker and easier to leave.

    Thanks so much for sharing your story!

  107. I second this, it would be very interesting to hear something like this.

    David Mayo did say in one of his “sunday talks” at the AAC that LRH told Mayo there “might be a conflict of interests” between the people who work for stats and the people who are preserving the tech. He said LRH might have predicted how things would turn out, but it was just a possibility.

  108. I prefer to see psychiatry as a subject and a profession that has various kinds of objectives – many wrong-headed and contra-survival from a Scientological point of view – but which is practiced by some people who are trying to help their patients. I am assessing this on the basis of insufficient data perhaps, but I once had a good impression of a psychiatrist I met socially, and my favorite living essayist, Theodore Dalrymple, used to work as a prison psychiatrist. Here are two online collections of his essays:

    On the whole, despite many years as a Scientologist, I don’t really buy into the wholesale condemnation and demonification of psychiatry.

  109. Thank you so much for this article. A few points were really revealing to me: Betrayal in the name of help (a bit of lump in my throat when I read it) and the fact of the reversal of the dynamics. If you look at it from the 8th going down and how it is not working and totaqlly unachievable makes you want to crawl in a hole with a beer and hold it for a few hours.

    It makes me think of the bait and switch of the credit card companies. What is in your wallet? Nice glossy commercials makes you want to run over and get a card with a low or ZERO interest rate until you miss your first payment by 1 day and your interest is now 29.9% for life.

    The parallel betwen CC companies and SCN is not far off. They are not your friends. They are there to help you and give you just enough sugar to trap you and keep you in but the real intentions behind them is to get you, trap you and keep you paying for life.

    If you have a $10,000 bill unpaid in 6 months they will settle for $2500 and write off the rest. If you are in the SO and have a freeloader bill of $125,000 they will kindly let you go if you can find $36,700 cash.

    I still recall being released from my CLO in Canada years back when I came up with cash within 24 hours. My 6 months of routing out came to total halt when I came up with money to pay off my future freloader bill cash right now and I was out the door in minutes.

    Credit cards is a consumer product so heavily advertised that you go down to the bank begging on your knees to get. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE allow me to get a Mastercard so I can go into debt! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE I need it because then I NEED NEED NEED to pay the IAS and save the planet.

    Final result: Debt debt debt incurred, Church gets richer, you get poorer. They get richer,you go bankrupt.

    There is no real help in Scientology now. You might as well pick up New Slant on Life with a cup of coffee and read it quietly at home and start using it. Because LRH is talking to you not anyone else.

    Read dont listen. And stay away from CC companies. Cash is king in my world.

  110. Joanna, very well stated! I do understand. Thanks for sharing this with us.
    Love, Kirsi

  111. Superbly written and wonderful imagery 🙂

    ‘..we have a strange tangle of wooden planks and rope that becomes a labyrinth halfway across the chasm..’
    Had me picturing Indiana Jones and the temple of DM. (couldn’t resist the last bit)

  112. Joanna,
    Talented writing with a great mind and person behind it!
    Encore! Encore!

  113. Gary Morehead aka "Jackson"

    Joanna and Mary Jo,

    Beautiful…. Beautiful… BEAUTIFUL!

    “On the day in which we can fully trust each other, there will be peace on earth!”

    I for one and enjoying the peace I see in your family!!

    — Jackson

  114. Mary Jo~YOU deserve a big ole HUG!
    Like I tell my kids…remember, you’re representing your mama, girls. 😉
    You must be an awesome mother, Mary Jo!

  115. Joanna,
    Beautifully written. Ivan told me what a wonderful young woman you are, and I see that you are very special indeed. Your clarity of mind and perspective are truly illuminating, and throughout the text your gentle and compassionate nature just shines through. You are a true credit to your mom, she must be so very proud of you. I wish you much happiness in your continued journey outside of the fractured snow globe.

  116. Luna, I second that wholeheartedly!!! Credit to where credit belongs!

    Joana, Chapeau, I tip my hat! Powerfully put and so true, so true!

  117. “But anyway CD I’d just like to say f*ck you very much for your invalidation and evaluation and I hope that you accept it in the spirit it was given.”

    merely a difference in opinion my best RJ. 😉 or “viewpoint if you will.


    Psychiatry is too wide a subject to be incorporated whole into the CO$

  118. You need to destimulate, decompress or chill. Caliwog calls me a Church Scientologist and you call me a Pharmabot.

    When do I get a say in the matter who is me ? Do you really measure the Individual or are you just here to promote your favorit GPM topic?

    Sureley the thruth lies somewhere in the middle,

    ML. CD 😉

  119. Wow, Joanna: You write so eloquently! Your words and intentions shine brightly and I believe your heartfelt story will make a lot of fence-sitters THINK, you know? Love the snowglobe analogy, as well! Soooo glad you have escaped out of the bonds and trap of $cn!! May you discover joys, success and true happiness in your life! 🙂 Michelle

  120. martyrathbun09

    Caliwog is an OSA operative.

  121. The subject of Psychiatry may be disguised as a medical science but is per definition a field of classification of mental and behavioral symptoms. It is based on opinion and has no scientific evidence nor cure for a single mental illness and admits it. Governments ww have used psychiatric techniques for mind and population control which is very well documented. At the moment the chemical onslaught brought upon the world through psychiatric labels is peaking (thanks Davey). America has a quarter of its population on anti-depressiva and anti-psychotics, amphetamine derivates designed to permanently damage brain structure and nervous tissue (comm systems).

    However, there are many good psychs that seek to cure their patients. There is a whole new approach to the problems of behavior. Dr. Pelsser f.i. has been publishing for a decade scientific research in which she cures 70% of her ADHD kids using a diet, while 90% of her kids make remarkable improvements, every time. Ironically the good psychs don’t push pills, don’t use shock and don’t cut brains; the only accepted treatments in psychiatry as written. The good psychs stray from the subject and look into alternatives for real cures. They do find them like f.i. Dr. Mosher but the subject has not been rewritten to include any of them. To the contrary, it’s being rewritten to include more symptoms and more drug treatments. Treating symptoms is its total MO which makes it a defeatist ideology which has nothing to do with science, medicine nor cure, only with power, greed and suppression. It’s out of control and like Davey can’t bring itself to embrace other Dynamics. That its influence is being reduced as we speak is not due to the subject itself but to some Governments opening their eyes, rejecting its OP’s and demanding alternative solutions.

  122. Marty , I would like to give you my apology as I had 2 word docs and one was edited but the cut and paste action I did was from the 2nd unedited doc so I screwed up by not verifying it .I will be double checking it in future.
    I appreciate with all my heart that you posted it anyway with all you have going on around you.
    I work in the financial sector in an area that helps to unwind this mortgage crisis we are in and yesterday was one of those being broadsided by nasty surprises .My occupation gives me some reality on what you are dealing with daily yet maintain your composure so admirably.
    Thank very much for being there.

  123. Impartial English Girl

    I get it… 😉 Alas – so did George… xx

  124. Well he is giving me hell on WWP and I was suprised he was the onley one on there refering too me posting 2760 times on your Blog Marty. Do you think they made me my own personal folder ? Oh my.

  125. here’s 2 refs:
    LRH QUOTE: ”And the government, apparently, is just trying to take over administrative control of the Church and run it into Receivership, and then suck all the Tech under its wing, drop the Shades of Night over it, and use it for the “very select few”. (from PDC TAPE 21, 1950’s)

    LRH QUOTE: “… the United States government and the efforts of that government since 1955, stepped up since 1963, to seize Scientology rather than forbid or stop it …” (from HCO PL 14 Jun 65 Issue III “Politics, Freedom from”)

  126. Joanna,
    Hugs to you! I was thrilled to see your face beaming at me this morning! Excellent writing; you do have a way with words! I am so glad to know you. With the passions you have for making this world a better place, I have no doubt that no force in the ‘verse can stop you!

  127. Ascard, What the Hell are you talking about, please clarify.

    “the bank perpetrates the bad and knocks out the good”

  128. Just fricking WOW…

    You said it ALL…

  129. Be a sec check question for every posting. Hope you have a big wad.


  130. Fully Acknowledged. I do want all alternatives tried before pills come on the scene. Sadley it is in America Pills first last and forever. By the way The kid is not cured bentirely because it needs to keep to the diet wich is a huge bummer for a kid. Its a bit of a trade off but nevertheless the way to go in the majority of cases I concure. Nice maybe the Independant Scientologists can hook up with this dutch Doctor in time. But I don’t want the other extreme either. In some cases pills are benefitial.

    I will not go into the whole brain thing. But I will say this It is Gradïents. Some cases are more persisant than others.

  131. Heather,

    I made the distinction between psychiatry and institutional psychiatry a distinction that noted psychiatrist Dr. Thomas Szasz and founder of the Anti-Psychiatry movement makes himself.

    Scientology has traditionally never had any quarrel with independent psychiatrists. In fact there was an LRHED directed towards reaching out to these psychiatrists.

    Of course this all changed with the current holy jihad against psychiatry in general and even psychoanalysis which if you listen to the lecture ‘The History of Dianetics and Scientology’ is the basis for Dianetics.

    Anyway you want documented proof of the complicity of institutional psychiatry with the Mk Ultra project then you have to go no farther than Dr. Donald Ewen Cameron who was head of the APA at the time:

    This is also covered in John Marks seminal book The Search for the Machurian Candidate which you can read on line here:

    which contains the usual suspects of American Universities’ Psychiatric Departments and Institutions that were receiving funding from CIA through their cut out ‘The Human Ecology Fund’.

    The following links from namebase should connect the dots for you and give you access to various dox:

    However if that is insufficient then here is a listing of all Mk Ultra Dox that have been declassified since:

    Regarding institutional psychiatry’s involvement in torture. All you have to do is look through CIA’s Interrogation Manual to see the direct relationship:

    However if that doesn’t suffice then there is JAMA’s own report of physicians and psychiatrists involved in “enhanced interrogation techniques” under the Bush administration using their legal contortionist John Yoo to justify what blatantly amounts to torture:

    That should be sufficient but if not there is someone I know who knows someone who has about 138 banker’s boxes full of documents that have been released by CIA through FOIA regarding post Mk Ultra projects dealing with mind control.

  132. …”since Scientology and Management were the same thing. ”
    That’s a sick joke, they are like night and day. I guess we are not allowed to be sane. We are not allowed to differentiate similarities, differences, and identities.
    These persons are so robotic now, I wonder they are not aware of their own dynamics, (total confusion), which would make it impossible for them to see other’s dynamics. Therefore unable to see hats. Therefore unable to see the harm they inflict on others. Therefore completely irresponsible.

  133. Thank you Tara~ 🙂 ~ I hope to meet you and your girls someday!
    And thank you Jackson, that great beaming smile of yours came right through!!

  134. MJ
    I’m sure you realize how very much I duplicate exactly what you are saying. It was the most wonderful surprise to realize what incredible theta beings I had somehow attracted to be part of my life. It remains the biggest joy in my life as I am sure it is in yours.

  135. Good quotes.

    Well obviously they’ve succeeded in doing just that Mary Lee.

    Which why I’ve always called (IRS) deputy Miscavige their “Golden Boy”.

    Put’s a whole new spin on the “Golden Age of Admin” doesn’t it?

  136. Not smart to have you say who you are because cats often change color and the truth doesn’t lie in the middle. You crash with OSA because you’re defending Big Pharma and here you crash with me for the same reason. Didn’t you get a lifetime of free supply; weren’t you the one stating that Americans love their pills; didn’t you say that sales must be up; didn’t you object to the comparison of Davey’s Church with psychiatry, etc? All on this blog?

  137. Joanna,

    We’ve not met, but you are able to observe, differentiate, judge and decide at a level very few young people have reached. As you’ve said, it’s the intensity of your experiences thus far in life and in the Co$ that have led you to these abilities: “I wouldn’t have changed a single moment of my experiences, because every step was necessary for the next part in my journey, and it all led me to where I am today, which is an awesome place to be ….”

    Enjoy your life and keep observing, differentiating, judging and deciding. It only gets better!

    Just Me

  138. Surprised you acknowledged my favorite GPM topic. Even more surprised if you’d really wanted alternatives over pills that in some cases may be necessary (the real problem being that patients are not taken off the pills afterward as that is not economical). True that some kids may need to be careful with their food but they can always do an allergy rundown. But more true that some kids will develop their own personality which may not be the slavish obedience obtained through pills. Didn’t we just discuss the abundantly published chemical population control techniques of psychiatry, a subject that still prescribes pills while neglecting alternatives.

  139. I am not defending Big Pharma that is what you make of it. I am defending the right of the individual to have the best medical care.

    And you are EXACTLY parroting back the kind of things I expect from an Extremist. You can not understand the jokes it seems.

    Oh yes I said all that and UI alsoo have a Big Yakizu full of coughmedicine I bath in.

    Put that in the folder you are reading from LOL

  140. Well I for one object to your comparison of Davey’s Church with psychiatry. It’s a silly comparison that serves no useful purpose that I can see. So if you have a beef with CD, take it outside or offline please.

    If you can convince him to get into a “duke it out” match with you, great stuff. But please do it someplace I don’t have to watch.

  141. (Most control is with withholding information as the is in the 400,000 documents leaked on WikiLeaks)

    Yes but I have the feeling you want to ban all pills everywhere . And that isn’t happening on my watch.

    I have SEEN kids prosper with my own eyes, flourish even when prescribed ritalin. Alsoo have seen kids been taking of of it again because it was not working out. Well here in the Netherlands that does happen.

    The proffesion is set up in the states in a way it must lead to exes pill pushing But not all doctors in the US do that , to think that all do that is a generalization.

  142. Thank you Heather G very much.

  143. Yes, Sam querida, yes! We are blessed!

  144. Thank you Sinar. You are such a sweet and generous person!
    When I read Greg’s post I was so moved… what a great gift to be aware of what the experience had been and how it was changing for something better, and then anticipating more joys to come. We can’t give anyone this ability, it has to be individually experienced! But what we can do is share our own journey and in doing so it may resonate in others, and perhaps then they can move to experience the next level of their own path. And I think there is much value in sharing that painful slice of life, it should not be killed in a false anticipation that it won’t make a positive difference in the lives of others.
    Stable datum for me- being ourselves and vulnerable and open hearted is the winning game. No lies and cruelty from others can affect that.

  145. Hi Gandiguy,

    Yes, sure, anyone is free to contact me at

    (This also goes for old friends who disconnected. I echo my brother’s sentiments that my door is always open.)


  146. Hello amigos!
    I am in awe of the incredible outpouring of theta hugs, ” real snowflakes” 🙂 and sunshine rays coming from everyone, and so grateful for your personal communications. I wish I could thank you personally, and I look forward to meeting you all one day. This has been a very healing process for me, and I thank you sincerely for your help in this. Feel free to share my story with anyone you think it may help. Sending you each a big >hug<. Love, Joanna

  147. Wow! What an extrodinary post. Thank you.

  148. Joanna, just got back from a mini-trip and am travel weary, but didn’t want to miss the opportunity to validate you on such a very well written article, it will resonate with many. VWD on communicating this, thank you and love you, you’re truly a special observant being! I say to DM trying to get rid of the old timers, he’s got the New Timers to watch out for as well!

  149. Just a clarification if it hasn’t been done already and if it has another statement of it can’t hurt.
    Scientology is the study of knowing how to know. It includes any and every bit of data anywhere that furthers this understanding. it is not a person. It is not David Miscavige and it was not LRH. It was the materials codified and developed by LRH that happened to further this understanding. We admire and respect and honor LRH for having been the developer of the data. Anyone who applies the data and gets the understanding is a Scientology practitioner when he is applying it and getting that understanding. A person who uses the data and gets the understanding on a regular basis would be a Scientologist. Anyone who perverts the data and does not get the results of the understanding would be something else. From observations on these blogs it would seem that there are more actual Scientologists out of the Church than in!

  150. That’s a beautiful way of looking at life!

  151. So now it’s all a joke; cats change colors often indeed. Rest my case.

  152. I never compared Davey’s Church to psychiatry. That was someone’s (correct) observation of a valence shift. I have a beef with the invalidation of it.

  153. Joanna,
    A glorious and well written narrative. I love your snow globe metaphor and other imagery. I’m sure you have much to rant and rave about, but you were able to communicate superbly with an aesthetic wave that carried the entheta circumstances in conjunction with your epiphanies. Thank you, and I’m happy for you that you can take the good out of Scientology and discard the rest– the antithesis of Scientology!

  154. Wow! Joanna, what a team you & Mary-Jo must make!
    Beautiful write up! As I was reading several thoughts were going through my head. I was thinking of writing them in my response to your post but I would rapidly read my thought in the folowing paragraph, LOL. You’re very funny & so smart. You write with a lot of reality. What you said really indicated to me. Thank you! Big hugs to you & your family


  155. Banning all pills or even just opiates (no more insulin, no more morphine after operations, etc.) would be so idiotic and disastrous that only people like Davey would lobby for it. The generalization consists of regarding anyone who is against chemical population control is also against all medication. Any addict who gets his daily cocaine dose will change his behavior remarkably and flourish for a couple of hours. Any kid with an untreated underlying physical condition and not yet addicted may act up badly against a gradual cocaine release in his body.

  156. What makes you think the IAS reges are “unknowing” about what they are doing?

  157. Yes it would be idiotic to ban blindley all

    Who is talking about drugging children with cocaïne ? That is child abuse. but I think you are talking about teens getting in contact with “bad elements” in socïety.

    I am against something else I see happening and that is the population controling itself by obscuring and not confronting their own emotions turning themselfs willingly and knowingly into Zombies working their ass of to buy that bigger house and that bigger car ! Raly to Restore Sanity !

  158. Took me a while. Well Any person better stasy clear of those practices. It is contra what a mental health practicionar should be dabbling with. The Subject is not wrong but it is used for wrong purposes. You can choose to use it to built up peoples confidence or the reverse.

  159. I think you have an issue with taking things literally or can not see jokes when they are made.

    I can not believe that you believe Anons are paid 50 bucks to protests. And if you’ve been told that by a protestor than the joke is on you for believing it. It is actually a COS propaganda story. We just like to joke about that.

    Why be such a Sourpuss ;). *pokes you*

  160. I’m glad you agree that the problem is teens getting in contact with bad elements; the real bad ones not just get them hooked to cocaine but to a much more powerful drug.

  161. That is total crap.

    I took a trail of 30 days twice, 3 times a day 3 mg. I kept forgetrting to take it sommetimes. I found it a nuisance to remember when to take it. I did sleep better at night though, and could concentrate better on my work.

    I get more “high” from sniffing a beer than from taking ritalin.

    Didn’t see that one coming didn’t you.

  162. This is one of the best descriptions I have ever read. It matches what I felt when I lost my faith as a Christian in 1979. I was attending a Christian university and Christianity was supposed to have all of the answers for a lost and hurting world. Yet it too was a snow globe world in which pretend happiness was enforced on people. Our duty was to forsake all to preach the Gospel to as many people as possible before the Antichrist brought about a nuclear Armageddon and the violent end of the world. We could only trust other Christians, for the unsaved were all Sinners bound for destruction unless they accepted our message and God’s offer of salvation!

  163. You’re right, I didn’t see it coming and I feel sorry for you but at least I understand your jokes about a lifetime free supply for protesting. I also understand how Big Pharma is getting so much support on just about any blog and how modern trends are engineered. Thanks.

  164. RJ,

    I highlighted a statement you made about the present goal of “Psychiatry”:

    “Besides one of the stated goals of Psychiatry is to make the individual more tractable by manipulation and control.”

    and suggested that you provide evidence to support that contention.

    In response, you’ve cited events from the 40’s and 50’s. You’ve also cited a JAMA article about the complicity of some psychiatric and medical professionals in Bush-era torture. I can’t access the whole article. Is it supportive of their role or critical of it? The answer to that question makes quite a big difference, you see.

    In short, you have not provided any evidence to support your contention that “…one of the stated goals of Psychiatry is to make the individual more tractable by manipulation and control.”

  165. Also, what is “institutional psychiatry”? ie. WHO are institutional psychiatrists that you are tainting with this broad brush slur?

  166. J. Swift,

    Yes, there are so many ‘earlier similars’ to the betrayal and protest and isolation and suspicion surrounding what we now call religion.

    For those of us drawn to religious philosophies, I think it’s worth the trouble to appreciate the huge differences between a thinker’s initial ideas and what happens after others are drawn to the thinker and his or her ideas and to contemplate the processes that follow — of consideration, argumentation, identification and disagreement.

    The older I get, the less interested I am in complexities and the more interested I am in simplicity. What are the simplest philosophies? What is at the core of it? How easy are those philosophies to follow?

    The harder it is to understand and follow a belief, a religion, a philosphy, the less useful and the less true it seems to be. At the heart of useful belief systems is love. ARC. Duplication. Interested, not interesting. Looking, not believing. Serenity, not agitation. Appreciation, not criticism.

    Peace to us all this beautiful autumn morning,
    Just Me

  167. martyrathbun09

    Truth is simple, lies are complex.

  168. martyrathbun09

    Heather, what do you suppose the goal of putting upwards of half the population on drugs is? To make the populace more free and independent?

  169. Get real!


    You know what I mean by “institutional psychiatry”.

    If not you can find it defined here:

    You can also find it here:

    Both written by Psychiatrists to define Psychiatry as given in an institution and in most case funded by Government.

    Since when has calling a spade a spade been a “slur”?

  170. I absolutely loved this. It was so well worded! Isn’t it nice how truth “poofs” charge? It just nailed so much on the head, saying things I’d been trying to put into words myself over the last few months.
    At the same time, it makes me sick that we all dedicated so much to this group and lost so much in return!

  171. JAMA feels it violates their Hippocratic Oath which it does.

    They want to those involved in advising the Military and IC on torture techniques to be dragged in front of an ethics board.

    So you wouldn’t say that they are all that supportive of it.

    Also these experiments actually began under the Technical Services Section in the early 50’s and through the early ’60’s under their digraph “MK” and the cryptonym “ULTRA” until Earman the IG of CIA requested that they be discontinued when he discovered the program under DCI McCone.

    Only to be shifted under another code name “SEARCH” and was later transferred out of TSS later to become the Office of Technical Services which became TSD or Technical Services Division all under the Clandestine Services or CS AKA the Directorate of Plans later known as Operations and KNA the Clandestine Directorate and moved to the ORD or Office of Research and Development under the Directorate of Science and Technology.

    The same Directorate that was responsible for the Remote Viewing Program under the innocuous name of “Biofield Research”.

    Also many of the projects under ULTRA were transferred to an on going interagency and combined Military and Civilian program (which included ONI, ONR, G2, A2, CIA and possibly IC customers and participants in the FBI, BNDD FKA FBN later known as DEA and even NASA) known as ARTICHOKE.

    So it’s not just history and is continuing today under “non-lethal” weapons research which includes the former propaganda aspect known at one time as psywar or psyops and now known as “PM” or “Perception Management”.

    Something that Miscavige learned from Robert Gray formerly the Director of Hill and Knowlton which was actually more of an intel op than a PR firm.

  172. LOL, Cover hostility is a good friend of yours isn’t it 😉

  173. My tone level doesn’t really matter but ask just about anyone here how they feel for someone who can’t get auditing because of psych drugs. And whether or not you think my understanding of powerbroker ops was low or non existent, you did contribute to its increase, something this blog is dedicated to.

  174. That’s cool Joanna and sounds really great.
    My reason for asking was to determine the overt on the part of the Sea Org. Sometimes people are told they are qualified for the Sea Org when in actual fact they are not. And sometimes people are told they are not qualified for the Sea Org when in actual fact they are.

    Because LRH wrote certain policies on this for a true reason, either way one joins will never work out, unless one is qualified when one is and not qualified when one is not. Just to be more specific on it.

    But, OK for you, that you dig your life and are moving along. Me too.

  175. “someone who can’t get auditing because of psych drugs.”

    Lol at Church Scientologist.

  176. Actually “psyche drugs” are just like medical or street drugs.

    They can all be handled with a standard purif and a full Dianetic DRD per C/S Series 48 which includes TRs and full objectives.

    The hypocrisy of labeling some PCs “illegal” while embracing other actual illegal PCs like for example Greta Van Susteren or Adnan Khashoggi and his family for example is breath taking.

    I’ve audited cases that had taken Ritalin, Prozac, Thorazine, Lithium etc and never really had much difficultly except in rehabbing releases on Thorazine and Lithium because there aren’t really any unless you can call a feeling of deadness or woodeness a “release”.

    Hell if you put CD in front of me with an Emeter I’d audit him.

    Also his friend Boris as well.

    Spooks don’t scare me either 🙂

  177. Ritalin, Prozac, Thorazine, Lithium

    Ritalin is the od one out. It should work on the area in the frontal lobe of the brain that handles concentration. The other 3 are mood “stabilizerss”.
    Were it goes horribly wrong is when ritalin is used to subdue and alsoo used as a mood “stabilizer”
    It would be easier to make a clean cut by using an MRI machine to establish diagnosis . But of yet that is too expensive.
    We can keep chasing eachoters tails or encorperate this into the studies at Wisconsin University.

    I know less Prozac, Thorazine, Lithium would be needed as sympthom trearment when American Socïety and community sense would be grater along with feelings of belonging, selfworth, safety and a future perspective that looks bright or a chance self actualizasion.

  178. Labyrinth or Liberty?

    Joanna Cook. I,vebeen thinking about something fitting musically and this is it.

    with regards. CD

  179. However quik the lie, the truth will pas her by.

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