Warning: Do not watch the following video if you just ate. Secure beverages a fair distance from your computer before watching. Clear any children out of the room whom you do not wish to hear you curse at the top of your lungs. If you have extremely high blood pressure, skip the video entirely. – blog management
By Mike Rinder
Watching Dear Leader’s March 13 “tribute” to L. Ron Hubbard is to experience two plus hours of gag-inducing tragicomedy.
But it is also the latest evidence of what Mark McKinstry said in response to Marty’s posting Miscavige’s New Shock Squads.
“Then the applause would come and the AGREEMENT and with that the reality established, despite what the real scene was. You are left with the feeling that you are alone in your observation, the one who is going to bring the party down with the facts, and so, on it goes.
“I think that under this, a vacuum was left when LRH dropped his body. Miscavige stepped in to fill that vacuum/confusion. Most Scientologists who cling to the current organization want someone in authority to stand up, tell them how right it is going everywhere (except in the sector where they are), interpret world events and explain the tech for them. And, as you say, come in and make things go right in their area sometime in the future.
“And, the fact that it is wrapped in a high-tech glitzy presentation just adds to the credibility. Like going to a movie, you can suspend disbelief for two hours and let the outpoints wash over you.”
If you watched the video above, you will observe Dear Leader strutting onto stage where he sucks up the “Standing O” with no attempt to end it (this was a crime of magnitude back when he allowed others to participate in these International Events – Heber in particular was victimized for not curtailing applause for him when he walked on stage). The adoring crowds’ applause goes on for a minute and 19 seconds as Dear Leader positively revels in it. (And note, the picture of LRH you see after 20 seconds was added by the video editors afterwards –the audience didn’t see it). That is vomit-worthy. What happens next is tragic.
Dear Leader presents a “rolling thunder” (a term he coined to describe a series of stats one after the other without a breath, building to one final, crazed crescendo of cheering and applause when the last bursting graph busts out the top of the screen to fireworks and shooting stars) of Dan Shermanspeak ©® recounting the accomplishments of the life of LRH. They put everything they had into it to try to hype LRH, including over-the-top graphics and over-inflated and deceptive “stats.” That resulted in 38 seconds of applause – less than half what was lavished on Dear Leader. Exactly as he planned it.
That one statistic tells you everything you need to know about the state of the Church of Miscavology.
The rest of the event lives up to the opening sequence. Throughout it, Dear Leader’s strange cadence, emphasis and pronunciation has become a parody you might expect to hear on South Park representing a radical, comical politician desperately trying to be “interesting.” And when combined with Shermanspeak©® it is virtually a foreign language.
The event was a case study in propaganda by redefinition of terms. Following is what Dear Leader said:
What LRH most wanted for his birthday – the gift of expansion.
But in this day and age, the epitome of expansion, the very action definition and the substance of the word – that’s an Ideal Organization.
But as a first word, let me once again reiterate what an Ideal Org represents – for while you have seen some magnificent structures of late, and are about to see others that will bedazzle your eyes, the real beauty of an Ideal Org is far more than skin deep. After all, they are built on tech and policy, literally.
Meaning, you can read a policy, describing what an org should be, then gaze upon an Ideal Org and there it is. And specifically, that pivotal LRH description of what one builds towards with an ideal org, and of which he writes: “The end product is not just an ideal org but a new civilization already on its way” To exactly that end, Ideal Orgs are designed to replicate across entire continents and so bring on all LRH tech everywhere and hence so make planetary clearing a reality.
As for our headway to date, ideal orgs presently equate to better than 1.3 million square feet, but even so, there’s another way to do the math: because the fact is, our 25 ideal orgs to date already introduce more new people to Dianetics and Scientology than all other orgs combined. So yes, where stands an Ideal Org, there lies our future. And while I could tell you about our next million square feet of ideal orgs now on the horizon and presently under construction, well all you really need to foresee the future are the Ideal Orgs I am about to present.
Let’s break this gobbledygook down.
Of course, everything he says ignores clear LRH policy about org buildings (cited here before, but the most basic bears repeating: PL 23 SEPT 70 QUARTERS, POLICY REGARDING, HISTORICAL where LRH lays out the POLICIES and RULES on the subject which include: “VIABILITY of the org is the first and foremost consideration.” “Quarters must be close to ample and cheap student and pc housing, restaurants and transport.” “Image is a secondary consideration.” “Renovations are destructive if extensive.”)
Yet, with that in mind, he brashly claims that he is “following policy,” and proceeds with his sleight of hand, redefining an “Ideal Org” as an “Ideal Building”. Accept that, and everything falls neatly into place. Here is how he does it:
Gain agreement with a truth: LRH wanted expansion (let’s not mention St. Hill size and the Universe Corps and staff going OT which is what the LRH ED is really about).
Sleaze in something that sounds sort of right: Ideal Orgs are the “epitome of expansion, the very action definition and the substance of the word.” Except he is NOT referring to an org, he is referring to a building. Listen carefully and he actually says it: An Ideal Org is a “magnificent structure”. And another Freudian slip: His new palaces will “bedazzle” you. The definition of that word is: “to cause someone to lose clear vision, especially from intense light; to confuse or disarm by dazzling.”
Add another correct sounding bit: Ideal Orgs “are built on tech and policy” – and then give “proof” of that because you can “gaze upon” one and see it (presumably because you can see the MEST: course rooms and auditing rooms… wow).
Throw in an LRH quote so it sounds really “On Source” — the end product of an Ideal Org is “a new civilization already on its way” (presuming an actual org rather than a building).
Therefore, it’s obvious, more Ideal Orgs (Buildings) will make Planetary Clearing a reality.
And thus, abracadabra, hey presto and shazzam! – the proof of our incredible headway towards planetary clearing is that ideal orgs presently equate to better than 1.3 million square feet. !! (Tip for Dear Leader: invest in old airplane hangars or maybe some abandoned car plants in Detroit – your square footage stat will go out through the ROOF).
But here’s the kicker. Even Dear Leader knows he has to give SOME sort of stat beyond the square feet to prove the “incredible expansion” of Scientology and the “massive forward advance” towards planetary clearing.
One might expect “Number of New Clears” – it is progress towards planetary clearing right Dave? Or how about “Number of Grad V auditors made” (that could audit people to Clear?). OK, maybe that’s a bit much. How about we take it back a notch and just go for total Well Done Auditing Hours? Student Completions? Anything related to delivery of Dianetics and Scientology? How about a NUMBER of anything? You know, like the good old days: “This year we delivered X number of courses, hours, completions, whatevers.”
Well, no such luck. It seems the best he could come up with to prove the MASSIVE international headway for planetary clearing was: “ our 25 ideal orgs to date already introduce more new people to Dianetics and Scientology than all other orgs combined.” OMG Dave, that is monumental. Presumably you didn’t give the number because it would be seriously embarrassing. Those 25 orgs “introduce” more people than the other 150 combined. But do they “introduce” 250 a week between them or 2500? No matter Dave, because the fact is that you have exposed the horrible truth your two or three fancy building per event can’t cover up: Scientology orgs are failing miserably. The average org (ie 150 around the world) produce just 1/8th as much as the “Ideal Orgs”. Now, in anyone’s mind that is small and failing when they are 1/8th of those empty Ideal Orgs (see next posting mentioned below).
Dave, you have to be worried: How long before someone leaks the ACTUAL stats of these wondrous Idle Orgs? Buffalo? Dallas? Malmo? Berlin? Madrid? Steven’s Creek? Seattle? Nashville? In the Vampire Empire, these are the most closely guarded secrets since the formula for Coca-Cola. Why? Shouldn’t you be proud of how you are clearing the planet with your Idle Orgs and be announcing it to the world? You’re not shy about promoting your accomplishments. And even tout the most amazing stats — 8,000 orgs, missions and groups (yet I see the church claiming NO connection to an Applied Scholastics school in Melbourne — but bet that one is counted — probably more than once — in your 8,000).
Next installment, the smoke and mirrors of the “Birthday Game Winners” presentation.